- What do each of the 16 personality types
find unattractive?
What's gonna keep them away?
What's gonna make 'em go, "Ew,"
but not in a good way.
Not like O-O-H, but more like E-W-W.
It's important to know
because if you're trying to attract someone to you
for whatever reason, they're you're crushed
or maybe you just wanna get to know them better as a friend,
you wanna make sure that you're not doing things
that will repel them or this video could be very helpful
if you're trying to get someone to not like you.
Man, I really wish Jimmy would leave me alone.
And I know he's this type, let me do this thing.
Enough dilly-dallying, my chunky monkeys.
Let's get into it.
Did Frank just call me a chunky monkey?
ESTPs usually have a good eye
for what is in or cool, K-E-W-L.
They understand trends, how to accessorize,
and in general, the fact that their appearance
is reflecting their social status.
So, something that can be really unattractive to ESTPs
is someone who makes them look less cool
or attractive by association.
Hey, that's that thing you say Frank.
Basically, don't cramp their style.
So if you show up to a party
as an ESTPs plus one wearing pajamas
while they're dressed to impress,
they'll disown you faster than you can say faux pas.
That's right, I'm throwing French terminology at you.
The energetic ESFP is always looking for the next adventure
and they can feel really dragged down by anything
that might stop those adventures,
like work, life, or responsibilities.
Not saying they're irresponsible,
just saying they don't wanna put responsibilities
first and foremost.
They're the type of person
that would rather jump out of a plane than do their taxes
with or without a parachute.
Frank, who does their taxes with a parachute?
Because of this, they tend to find individuals
who live for the nine to five grind
and never let loose to be buzzkills.
This isn't to say
that you can't be work focused or professional,
but if you never set aside time to have a good time
or even worse, if you criticize the ESFP
for wanting to have fun,
they'll be out the door before you can say, "TGIF."
Thank goodness, I'm watching Frank James.
Probably the most organized of the 16 types,
the ISTJ likes everything to be in order.
They're the type of people
who alphabetize their canned goods
and color code their socks.
As such, they're not gonna be attracted to individuals
who are carelessly messy or unorganized,
with an emphasis on carelessly.
Like if you're someone who can get a little messy
I mean like who doesn't, am I right?
But then, you clean it up, it won't be a problem.
But if you let things stay unorganized forever
or you're the type of person
who only cleans up once in a blue moon,
you're gonna find the ISTJs wanting to get away from you
with great speed.
ISFJs like their friendships and relationships
to be personal and even sentimental,
valuing the experiences and memories they create.
They're the type of people who take a million pictures
and save every ticket stab.
This leads them to be the type most likely to stop
and smell the roses.
To enjoy things, instead of just rushing through them.
As such, ISFJs are gonna feel less appreciated
by individuals who either try to rush them
through such moments or who don't respect
their appreciation for it.
You don't have to be sentimental like the ISFJ.
You just have to acknowledge
that it's okay for them to be that way.
'Cause if they feel like you're rushing them through life,
they're gonna peace out.
ESTJs love to give advice,
even if it isn't always the most appreciated
by everyone around them.
They're the type of people who always jump in
no matter what you're doing
and correct you if you're doing it wrong.
If you have a problem, an ESTJ likely has a solution for you
and that solution is generally gonna be straightforward
and by the books, the right way to do it.
They're not gonna lead you astray.
So, what is unattractive to ESTJs
is someone who consistently struggles
despite the ESTJ giving them the right way
to fix the problem, especially if you were
just like outright ignoring their advice.
To be attractive to ESTJs,
you need to be able to take advice and criticism
without feeling personally attacked.
And if you want extra points,
you want a little brownie points,
give them an even better solution
they didn't even know existed.
I mean when you can,
I don't expect you to come up with something every time.
At that point, you just come across like a know-it-all.
Known for their ambition and desire to achieve,
ENTJs find themselves pushing
for greater and greater heights.
They're the type of people who won't settle
for anything less than the championship, metaphorically.
While they might recognize that not everyone around them
is as competitive as they are,
they're still gonna be less attracted to individuals
who don't believe that they have the capability
to achieve their goals.
To ENTJs, no goal is out of reach with effort,
And one of their goals in life
is often (laughs) being able to speak correctly
and inspiring that same mental attitude in other people.
Yes, ENTJs are competitive
but they also want you to win as well.
So if someone is unable to adopt
at least some desire to grow or develop some go-getterness,
and ENTJ is not gonna wanna be around them for long.
ESFJs are like the party planners of the personality world.
They're always ensuring that everything runs smoothly
and that traditions are upheld.
They're the type of people who make sure
the cake is cut at the right time
and that everyone's having a good time.
I said time twice in a sentence and that kind of annoys me.
This leads ESFJs to find individuals
who consistently go against the grain,
especially if they do so without reason, unattractive.
While a rebel with a good cause might be okay
in the ESFJ's eyes, someone who causes problems
for the group with no good reason
is gonna quickly push an ESFJ away.
As the type most focused on the future of people,
ENFJs spend a lot of time trying to do good
in their friend circles and larger communities.
It is very common for them to stand up for the little guy
or to go out of their way to help someone in need.
As such, ENFJs are gonna feel less attracted
towards people who don't ever show a selfless side.
Like if you're the type of person to scoff
at a homeless person who's asking for some change
is not gonna be a good look with the ENFJ.
We can all be selfish from time to time.
But ENFJs like it when you at the very least acknowledge
those moments of selfishness
and then try to do a little bit better.
ISFPs live life through the lens of passion,
what motivates and inspires them.
They're always looking for the next thing
to ignite the flame within their hearts
and get them excited,
whether it's art, writing,
a personal obsession or interest,
or anything they feel strongly about.
What ISFPs find unattractive are those
who aren't able to appreciate the intensity
or importance of their passion.
It's like if an ISFP came to you with a painting they made
and they told you they poured their heart and soul into it
and you respond with, "Oh, that's cute,"
they will lose interest in you
faster than something that's real fast.
There's often a very clear line between good and bad
and right and wrong for INFPs
and they spend a lot of time refining
what they think is aligned with those values.
They're the type of people who will fight for their beliefs,
like they're a superhero in a movie.
So if you're the type of person who's morally flexible
and doesn't have any convictions
or if you happen to hold beliefs
that directly conflict with the INFPs,
don't expect them to be your partner in crime.
They will see you as a villain
and wanna keep their distance.
ISTPs are known for their hands on intelligence
and their ability to jump right into new tasks
and learn as they go.
To them, learning through action is easy
and it's their preferred way of gaining knowledge.
They're like MacGyver.
They can fix anything with a paperclip and a rubber band.
No one in my audience knows who MacGyver is.
ISTPs won't likely be attracted to individuals
who don't have any hands-on abilities
or at the very least, people who won't even try
to learn by doing.
It's like, what do you mean you can't change a tire?
Well, have you ever tried?
If your answer is no, especially if you're like
"And I don't ever wanna try,"
their patience for helping you is gonna evaporate.
The INTPs can be one of the harder types
to get closer to and attract.
INTPs aren't terribly concerned with social norms
and oftentimes, they're actually pushing back
against those norms just to test the boundary.
So, what INTPs find unattractive in others
is someone who expects them to act in specific ways
just because it's normal or socially acceptable.
INTPs wanna be their cerebral and eccentric selves
and constant pressure to act otherwise
is a quick way to push an INTP away.
Of all the types, the ENFP is probably the quickest
when it comes to how they approach
their interest and hobbies.
They're the type of people
who will pick up a new instrument, start a new business,
and write a book all in the same month.
This leads them to be a type
that doesn't necessarily feel
like they're on a particular path,
in the conventional sense.
Their path is where their heart takes them.
They're blazing their own path as they go.
Thus, they can find people who only have one focus in life
or even worse, people who try to force them
to only have one focus, bothersome.
They don't like one-trick ponies, people.
ENFPs, they're like wild birds.
They need to be able to be free and fly,
not locked in a cage, a cage of your lies.
I don't even know.
ENTPs like to take risks,
especially in the realm of creativity
like a new project, a startup business,
a new skill to learn.
All of these are right up the ENTP's alley.
This is especially noticeable to others
because ENTPs don't always stick
with their projects for too long.
'Cause to them, they don't wanna feel married
to every idea they have
and instead they see each of them
as a different toy in their sandbox.
Oh, I have one idea.
This is cool.
I can drop it and go to another one.
Oh, maybe I'll go back to this one later.
I don't know.
This leads ENTPs to be less interested
in people who are very risk averse
and especially people who won't even humor
their sometimes off the wall ideas.
Like you don't have to invest
in their new tech startup,
but just show a general interest in it
and give them some moral support along the way.
It just takes a little bit.
INTJs are notable for their long-term plans
and the often abstract goals associated with them.
They spend many hours thinking plans out in their mind,
but very little time formally mapping things out.
So when it comes time to share their insights
they have to go through a lot of work
to make those things make sense to others.
Introverted intuition,
man, it doesn't make a lot of sense to other people.
It's like it makes sense up here,
but then you when it comes out here
doesn't really make sense.
This makes INTJs less drawn
to people who aren't able to see the value
in their insights from the very early stages.
Say for example, an INTJ wants to start a business
that to most people would seem risky.
But behind the scenes, the INTJ
has an entire plan figured out,
with a backup plan if it falls through
and it's like this is ready to go.
To an INTJ, there's a level of trust that needs to be had
with these kinds of plans
that most people won't give them right away.
And the INTJ's patience for people
who won't give that trust is nonexistent.
To put it simply, they would rather say bye-bye to you
than to have to go through a ton of effort
to explain every bit of their ideas
and prove their validity to you.
INFJs like to dive into other people's minds
like a deep sea exploration.
There's something fascinating
when you can talk to someone else,
without feeling limited in what you can talk about
or how you express yourself.
As such, INFJs are less likely to like people
who are emotionally closed off
or won't at least meet them
in the middle of emotional expression.
Like, sure, I get it.
It's not always appropriate or even enjoyable
to have excessively deep conversations all the time.
But I'm just talking about like throwing the INFJ a bone.
All right, here's an example.
Imagine an INFJ is coming out of a movie theater
with someone else and is like,
"Dang, that movie was amazing.
I was on an emotional rollercoaster,
like when the people said that thing
and I was like crying.
What did you think?"
And then, the other person responds with,
"Yeah, I liked it."
"That's it?"
Probably won't be the type of person
that an INFJ will be attracted to in the long run.
Thanks for watching it.
Until next time, stay cool and attractive.
♪ They say a strangers come to town ♪
They call him Mr. Frank James.