- Welcome to Set List stand-up without a net
live at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival.
(audience cheers)
- Where some of the UK's favorite comedians
are coming on stage with no preparation whatsoever.
We'll tell 'em what they're gonna be talking about
in stand-up created in the moment and under pressure.
- Folks we have a very exciting treat comin' up right now.
First time Set List-er, ladies and gentleman.
(audience claps)
Will you welcome, the never-before-seen Set List
of Jason Manford.
(audience cheers)
- Hello.
(audience cheers loudly)
(Jason laughs)
Fuck me.
(audience laughs)
I'm sold out, what the fuck am I doing?
(audience laughs loudly)
Folks,
as a northern comic
I often spend my tour talkin' about
Greggs the baker and funny things me dad says.
(audience laughs)
Some nights ya just find yourself
just in a room of like-minded people
and you can just stretch your wings
a little bit, you know what I mean?
Talk about the stuff that's really on your mind.
And for me,
I just think, if there's one nation on this earth
who deserves a little island off the coast of Spain
that's got fuck all on it,
it's Canada (mumbles).
(audience laughs)
They have to live next to America.
Just give 'em somethin', give 'em somethin'.
Just let 'em have Gibraltar, everybody.
(audience laughs loudly)
No.
As part of my history degree,
I also
studied hieroglyphics and various other languages
that you've never seen or heard of.
Now you don't know what this says here,
but that is actually, the top bit is Gregg's the baker,
and the bottom is funny things me dad says.
(audience laughs loudly)
This is right up my street.
(audience laughs)
I often talk about me family on stage.
I don't like to talk about 'em all for various reasons.
Some of them don't make the Live at the Apollo cut.
(audience laughs)
People who paid a license fee
they want to hear about the (mumbles).
Yo, say the things that your Nana says,
oh my god, tell 'em and they laugh,
and then I go home and cry myself to sleep.
And then one day I remember goin' on to do me gig
and I got a little phone call.
I was nervous, you know it was
Live at the Apollo, I was nervous.
My uncle Franz (audience laughs loudly)
He rang and he said,
he said Jason!
Oh I won't do the accent any further.
(audience laughs)
Not!
But you've heard German people before.
Imagine what I'm sayin' next is in a German accent
and then just do the magic in your head, it don't matter.
He said Jason, are you nervous about
doing Live at the Apollo?
And I said I am uncle Franz.
And he said what's the audience like?
And I said yes, good lot, they're up for it lot.
He said are there any Jews in the audience?
And I said there's probably a couple.
He said don't make them laugh, he said.
(audience laughs)
He said if you could just specify
just the non-Jews in the audience that would be better.
And I said I can't really do that Franz,
to be honest I can't stand by that.
For me, I like to hit as big a demographic as I can
and that includes Jews, and to be fair,
if they bought the DVD, Nazis (mumbles)
right, you know what I mean? (audience laughs)
And he used to say to me,
he used to say.
A-B-P-T-D, and I never knew what it meant.
And I still don't.
(audience laughs)
(Jason laughs)
Is that it? Was that the last one?
(audience cheers loudly)
Well let's see what else there is, let's see.
(audience laughs)
There's nothing worse than being deaf I imagine.
Must be awful,
but if you were like a midget deaf person
(audience laughs loudly)
I mean who is catering for you, you know what I mean?
Like who is dealing with that?
So before I go, I would like to say
that I've launched a new website
microsignlanguage.com.
And if you know any midgets give 'em a,
well don't give 'em a ring.
(audience laughs)
Let 'em know that there's people who care.
That's all I wanna say.
Good night and God bless!
Thanks very much, thank you!
(guitar strumming)
(upbeat music)