hey everyone and welcome to top think today we're going to learn about 12 ways to heal your broken
heart now let's begin number one reflective thinking how many times have you told yourself
don't think about your ex after a breakup everyone struggles to avoid these reflective thoughts you
try everything to get rid of these romantic moments and happy memories but they just keep
coming back no matter how hard you try the truth is the more you resist the worse it's going to get
it's all thanks to something called ironic process theory if I told you not to think about something
you're going to think about it that's just the way your brain works so when you tell yourself not to
think about your ex guess what happens your brain can't think about anything else you're trying so
hard to resist those memories that you're actually making them stronger as backwards as it sounds a
great way to heal a broken heart is to think about the person that broke it let yourself experience
those bittersweet memories stop trying to shove them down otherwise you'll spend months hung up
on your past relationship when you could be moving on number two fill your life with laughter when
you're feeling sad and overwhelmed laughter is the best medicine it boosts your mood it
brightens your day and it clears your head each time you laugh it's like therapy for your brain
so if you're hurting after a broken relationship fill your life with as much laughter as you can do
fun activities with your friends listen to your favorite comedians or just watch your pets be
their usual goofy selves a laugh may not seem like much right now but every time you crack
yourself up you take one step closer towards your normal happy self number three find your
independence after a relationship ends there's often a huge void in your life your ex took up
a lot of your time and energy so without them you might feel empty or aimless so naturally you try
to fill that void with anything you can whether it's hobbies friends or new romantic partners you
get desperate to make that emptiness disappear but hey you don't need anyone else to make you
happy you don't need anyone else to give your life direction you can do that all on your own
by rediscovering your independence you can heal your broken heart and rebuild your self-esteem
you'll get your confidence back you'll enjoy your passions more you'll gradually remember
what it means to love yourself and you'll grow stronger for it so after a breakup be as active
and independent as you can number four ditch social media when your hearts broken you might
feel like wasting the day away on social media it might distract you from thinking about your
ex or maybe you're doing the opposite you're trying to keep tabs on everything your ex is
doing either way spending that much time on social media is really unhealthy and it isn't helping you
heal your broken heart not only is it a waste of time but social media also digs you deeper
into that pit of anxiety and grief each time you see a picture or post from your ex it's going to
take you one step backwards it'll make you angry sad and frustrated all over again digging you into
an even deeper hole after a bad breakup get off social media for a while deactivate your accounts
or delete the apps off your phone it doesn't have to be forever but until you can get over your
breakup social media is never a good idea number five mutual understanding in times of grief one
of the best things you can do is to find someone else who understands your pain someone who's gone
through a similar experience just how challenging it can be while it's helpful to talk to friends
and family it might feel a little strange they're trying to help you but they don't really get it
and there's always a little bit of pity in their voice that just makes you feel worse that's why
it's incredibly helpful to talk to someone who truly gets what you're going through maybe they
just experienced a bad breakup of their own during that time they might have struggled to fill the
void or rediscover their independence now that you are in the same situation they can genuinely
empathize and give you the kind of advice that will help you move past your pain number six
discover your strengths few experiences are as emotionally draining as a breakup so when you're
feeling low it's crucial that you think about your strengths and concentrate on all the things that
you do well even though you don't feel like your usual self those strengths don't just disappear
whether you're crafty hyper social or just a good friend use these strengths to remember how tough
and capable you really are number 7 neutralize blame don't blame yourself don't blame your ex
don't blame the timing or the context there's a popular misconception that someone has to accept
blame when a relationship falls apart that it has to be someone's fault but it doesn't sometimes
relationships just end couples just fizzle out and break up so don't spend your time searching for
someone or something to pin your breakup on it's not healthy to nitpick everything that went wrong
with your relationship you'll replay those rough patches in your mind searching for some way to fix
them but you can't change the past no matter how hard you try so blaming yourself or your
ex won't do anyone any good number eight dispel self-judgement the worst thing you can do after
a breakup is judge yourself you might react in all kinds of ways you weren't expecting you might feel
overwhelmed by feelings you weren't ready for but that's okay grief strikes everyone differently and
you have very little control over what shape your grief takes so don't ridicule yourself for having
strong emotions after a breakup it's critical that you wholeheartedly accept yourself because
self judgment slows down the healing process it convinces you to stuff down those negative
feelings to pretend like you're not actually angry or sad that may seem like a good idea
in the moment but holding things in forces you to internalize that negativity so instead let
yourself really feel your feelings and remember that there's no right or wrong way to get over
a breakup everyone experiences a broken heart differently all you can do is accept yourself
and try your best to move forward number 9 plenty of plans after a breakup try to keep yourself as
busy as you can don't leave yourself tons of free time to sit around and do nothing because in those
lazy and isolated moments you'll fall back into old patterns you'll drift toward negative thoughts
and unhealthy habits with nothing there to uplift or entertain you your grief will take its toll so
make plenty of plans you might go out of your way to meet new people or hang out with new friends or
maybe you decide to work overtime at your job the key is to spend as little time feeling aimless as
possible after a breakup you never want to find yourself lying in bed and staring at your phone
in the middle of the day because that's when that negativity comes rushing back if you make plenty
of plans getting over your breakup will be a whole lot quicker and easier than you thought
number ten create distance a small but effective strategy for healing a broken heart is to create
distance I'm talking about both physical and technological distance that means you can't see
them in person you can't talk to them over the phone and you can't text them randomly late at
night even if you're just checking in because each time you make contact with your ex you're
extending the length of time that it takes for you to heal just think about your breakup like a
countdown each day that you avoid talking to your ex that countdown gets closer to zero but when you
make contact you're undoing all the progress that you made so create that distance and stick to it
block their number unfollow them on social media you can even go on a trip to a different state or
country if you have the time all of these tricks will help you make a clean break which is exactly
what you need to heal your broken heart number 11 exercise your body exercise isn't just good
for your physical health it can be a great way to work through the pain and frustration of a broken
heart as little as 15 minutes of exercise can completely turn your day around it can lift your
spirits it can clear your head and it can help you work that stress out of your system that's why in
the midst of a bad breakup regular exercise ensures that you stay healthy and keep your
head on straight number 12 imagine the future sometimes the only way to heal a broken heart
is to give yourself something to look forward to something that makes you excited about the future
as you think about moving on don't be afraid to let your mind wander let yourself fantasize about
new people new relationships and new lifestyles imagine what it'll be like when you've met someone
else and you're even happier than you were before because no matter how hopeless things
feel right now there's a world of opportunity waiting just around the corner hey thank you
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