- Charlotte was supposed to be in a sorority
at Smith College, but that's a historical women's college
that did not enroll in Greek life.
And that is every inaccuracy in the Sex and the City series.
- Nope, not nerdy.
Next. (pounding)
Hmm, yes?
- I can recite the entire
Lord of the Rings series in Sindarin.
- Oh, great, yes, you're good, step right in.
(pounding)
- Do you dare say you are a nerd?
- I do.
- And what have you prepared today?
Perhaps expertise on the elfstone of Glorfendale?
The wand make-up of every wizard at Hogwarts?
Box office statistics for Star Wars?
- It was supposed to bomb, you know.
- The graphics were revolutionary for the time.
- Really changed everything up.
- No.
Actually, I am here to present
original Beanie Baby birthdays.
For instance, today is March 23rd,
so that is Hope, the bear's birthday,
but it is also Coco, the cute little brown dog's birthday.
And then tomorrow, the 24th,
it is Cheddar the mouse's birthday!
Fairydust's birthday, that's a bear, too,
there are a ton of bears--
- Nope, not nerdy.
Next! - Really?
Why, what?
- Beanie Babies are stuffed animals,
and stuffed animals are not nerdy.
- Hear hear!
- Yeah, but you let that guy in with the Gremlin wiki.
I mean, Gremlin's are stuffed animals, right?
That's what they look like.
(gasping) - What?
- I never. - Ugh.
- C'mon, admit it, you have some weird attachment
to this word to the point where you exclude anything
that isn't male-centered interests.
- Excuse me! - I would never.
- Okay, fine.
Well, I am super nerdy about Barbies.
I can name every type of Skipper,
and I know all of their backstories.
- No no no no no no, you don't understand.
Barbies are simply not nerdy.
- Sorry, I just wanted to see if I'm cleared
to be an action figure nerd?
- Why of course! - Step right in.
(pounding)
- Action figures?
Barbies are action figures!
C'mon, just admit it, you have a bias
toward male-centered stuff!
- I would never!
And besides, Barbies could never be
as nerdy as action figures.
- Action figures represent beloved canon, worldly pursuits.
- There are a ton of Barbie movies, okay.
And she has like a thousand jobs and canon.
Tommy, her little brother, not her son, somehow.
Oh my God, and remember Midge?
No wedding ring.
I mean, scandal in the dream house, am I right?
- Pish posh! - No, no, no.
- A nerd interest is defined by the depth and quality
of the universe from which it comes,
the uselessness of the information.
- Thereby justifying the extra effort involved
in toiling over said information.
- And, the level of obsession that the viewer maintains.
- For example, we had a Game of Thrones nerd
here the other day.
- Ooh, he maintained a depth of knowledge
about an HBO universe with many characters
with extended backstories who went through
trials and tribulations.
- And a whole lotta sex.
- Uh, Sex in the City is an HBO universe
with many characters with extensive backgrounds
that go through trials and tribulations,
while having a whole lotta sex.
- But, there's no magical creatures, aha!
- If you don't think that Steve is a magical creature,
I feel sorry for you.
- Ooow, make her stop.
(buzzing)
- Fine, okay, I love My Little Pony.
And it has magic, and it has creatures and dragons
and endless backstory, and a whole universe of canon.
Is that nerdy enough?
- Hm, maybe if you're 45 and a man.
- But if you're 12 and a girl, no!
- Lame as hell (chuckling).