We've all seen it, you know, you're walking down the street
and you see a knock out of a woman, your eyes linger for a
brief but respectful moment. And then you notice the guy by her
side. And you have to ask yourself what she's with him.
Hello, I'm Caitlin V, your sex and relationship coach. And
today, we are going to talk about something that guys often
overlook when trying to figure out why they haven't landed the
one. Yet, whether you're just looking to casually date or you
are looking to lock down something for the long haul.
This is the one thing that could be the answer to why you're not
attracting the type of women that you want. And that thing,
my friends is mindset. You see, all women are different. We all
look for different things when it comes to finding a partner.
There are, however, some pretty universal qualities that all
women are drawn to. And today I'm going to reveal these seven
mindsets that attract women, like crazy. And I'm not just
talking about things that pique a momentary temporary interest.
I'm talking about perspectives that will benefit you in all
aspects of your life, and just happen to attract incredible,
special, amazing women along the way. So many things are at play
when it comes to gaining and keeping attraction. So make sure
to take a second and subscribe to this channel for my countless
tips and tricks to level up your sex and relationship life.
And you will want to stay until the end of the video because
each and every one of these is highly impactful when it comes
to magnetizing women. And each and every single one of them is
valid and important. And by the way, I'm going to explain each
of them as opposites because you will find yourself usually
occupying one or the other of these mindsets, and it helps me
to explain them and put them into context. Okay, without
further ado, mindset number one, abundance versus scarcity. These
terms were initially coined in the best selling book The Seven
Habits of Highly Effective People. And let me tell you, if
you're out there looking at the world from a mindset of
scarcity, there is another way. A better way at that having a
mindset rooted in scarcity means that you look at the whole world
as a big finite pie. That means when someone out there takes a
piece of that pie whether it's landing a new job or getting
with a woman of their dreams, it means there's one last piece to
go around for you. And let me tell you from the viewpoint of
dating, this comes off as insecure thirsty and more than a
little desperate. Now a person with an abundance mindset sees
the world as having limitless options and opportunities. This
person feels like everything is working out for them all the
time through the good and the bad. They don't get worried or
jealous when great things happen to the people around them
because guess what? They know that there's plenty of good to
go around. Not only do women find this incredibly sexy and
attractive and reassuring, it is so beneficial to your personal
growth and well being that if you take nothing else from this
video or this channel or me as your coach, taking an abundance
mindset will change your entire life. Alright, mindset number
two, Victor vs victim I want to be with a man who feels like the
entire world is out to get him sad, no woman ever look, I get
it shit happens. Sometimes it's hard to stay positive. But if
you want to lead a happier, more empowered life, I highly
recommend staying away from self victimization someone with the
mindset of a victim always feels like the world is out to get
them and that it usually really is succeeding at getting them
whereas people with the mindset of a victor accept tough
challenges from a position of strength and confidence. It
sucks when things don't go our way. But with the mindset of a
victor, you can see your struggles as an opportunity to
learn if you know that there's always a way out and that as
long as you're learning it means you're winning, that you have a
victim mindset mindset number three, growth versus fixed
growth. And I am not talking about the type that happens in
your pants. Men with a growth mindset are incredibly
attractive to women for a few reasons. First, they're focused
on self betterment. People with a growth mindset want to learn
more to achieve one to beat the best possible version of
themselves. Think about it. Being in a relationship with a
man who has a growth mindset is so appealing because he's
focused on the positive he's developing that translates to
how he's going to behave in the context of your romantic or
sexual relationship and On the flip side,
People who have a fixed mindset tend to be stubborn. They
approach life from the perspective of this is me, this
is how it's going to be tough luck, everybody. If you've ever
seen someone say something like, well, I just can't or I just
don't that someone who has a fixed mindset. I just can't
learn how to do this. Because I'm stuck where I am right now.
definitely do not want to jump all over that guy's deck, all
relationships take compromise. And when a woman encounters a
man with a fixed mindset, she's found a guy who is not going to
be compromising because he is not focused on getting better.
Number four, grateful versus resentful. There is a ridiculous
amount of research indicating that gratitude is incredibly
important for building and maintaining social and romantic
relationships. If you implement no other tool, except for just
gratitude, you are more likely to have a successful, romantic,
intimate, communicative and joyful, romantic relationship.
Try it out, it is the cheapest thing you can do to increase
your satisfaction in life. In the context of a romantic
partnership. A person with a grateful mindset is good at
noticing and appreciating all of the good traits in their
partner, they don't lose sight of all of the things that they
like about the person that they're with gratitudes less
appealing counterpart is resentment. And if you fall into
a resentful mindset, it means that you dwell on the negatives.
It's also a good predictor that your relationship is going to
end because your partner is eventually going to leave you or
they're in a horrible resentment codependency love triangle with
you where they hate you, but they will not leave which I do
not wish on my worst enemy. Now, I am not suggesting that you or
your partner, be Pollyanna and just see the world through rose
colored glasses, it is important to identify problems as they
come up. But women are looking for men who identify those
problems with a purpose of addressing them and working
through them and not just complaining about what a
horrible cook you are for the rest of your life. Gratitude is
not just attractive in romantic partnerships. It is attractive
in general, if you look at those people in your life, who tend to
have the most friends the most success, they're the center of
the party people are drawn to them like moths to a flame, I
can bet that they demonstrate a level of gratitude and they
share that with the people around them. All right, mindset.
Number five, compassionate versus selfish. I mean, this one
is a no brainer. Women want to be treated well. We want to be
with people who hold space for us who make us feel seen and
heard. And if we get the sense that someone lacks compassion or
fails to be able to empathize with perspectives that are
different from his own, that is a pretty immediate red flag. Now
on the opposite side of compassion is selfishness. If
you are coming from a selfish mindset, it means that you are
only focusing on yourself and how you feel at a given moment
in a given situation. What it really means is that you don't
actually have space to bring another person into the mix in a
meaningful ways. We all have times in our lives where it is
right. And it is necessary to be a little self centered. But
focusing on yourself in order to figure out what works for you is
also part of being in a healthy, fulfilling relationship. But
doing that in balance is what makes you an attractive partner.
mindset. Number six, open versus closed. If you have ever watched
in rom com, you have seen this play out.
The Lone, dissatisfied protagonist stuck in his ways,
going through life in a closed off.
along comes the amazing working sort of clumsy heroine and nine
times out of 10 she's played brazoria Dasha. Now, it's all
going well until things get real stuff continues to go wrong. And
eventually you can bet your ass that there will be a scene where
she's pleading with the guy. Why aren't you open up?
Well, women have seen these ROM coms, too. And we have learned
to suss out pretty quickly when we are dealing with the closed
off guy. And guess what? We are not Zooey Deschanel and we don't
have time for that shit. Women are looking for men with an open
mindset. And this doesn't just apply to relationships. When you
have an open mindset. It is present in all aspects of your
life. Open, people are adventurous, they're unafraid.
They welcome new challenges and they approach life with a sense
of excitement and vigor. The alternative to the open mindset
is, you guessed it closed. When we dig a little deeper, a closed
mindset is rooted in fear. People with closed mindsets are
afraid of change. They're afraid of trying new things. They're
afraid of taking risks. And studies have shown that people
with closed mindsets are less likely to get along with
different types of people. They're hesitant to explore new
activities. They tend to be less creative than their open
counterparts which
brings me to mindset numbers.
competent versus insecure. Last but not least, I bet you all saw
this coming from a mile away. This is huge. And in many ways
it is the combination of all of these other mindsets put
together, confidence people, we want confident men. And by the
way, if you're honest with yourself, don't you want to
confident woman to competence plays an enormous role in
attracting women. Confidence is all about being comfortable with
yourself. It's about trusting yourself and not being afraid to
put yourself out there. When you shift your mindset into a
confident state of mind. The world becomes your oyster. And
knowing that you, sir, are the shit. Confidence isn't about
being right all the time. It's not about always knowing what to
do. It's about valuing yourself and feeling comforted by the
fact that no matter what comes your way, you will figure it
out, possibly because you learn the six other mindsets that you
will apply to that situation. And guess what, when you have a
confident mindset, it radiates. Women can tell their little
spidey sense. That guy over there, he's confident I can just
tell. I'm gonna go talk to him. We do that ship. Confident men
know what they deserve, and it makes women want to give it to
them. competent men understand their boundaries. They know
their needs. They know how to assert themselves from a place
of self love and not from insecurity. They know that love
and attraction and fun and sex and pleasure are abundant. And
that makes them so much fun to be with. And women, we can tell
just as easily when you're coming from a place of
insecurity insecure guys struggle in relationships.
Because in order to create a healthy fulfilling bond with
someone you have to have one with, you guessed it yourself.
insecure people are often second guessing themselves and their
decisions. They don't know what they want. And they often engage
in codependent or even sabotaging behaviors in their
romantic relationships. And take this from someone who has dealt
with insecurity. Sometimes you can be super confident in one
area of your life, you show up to work and you're so confident
that you know what to do and how to do it. But as soon as you
leave work, and you're at the bar, making eyes of an
attractive lady, all of those insecurities show up and you
completely fall apart. So confidence and insecurity. It's
not a zero sum game. It's way more complicated than that.
Listen, I know you might be thinking right now.
I do not have these mindsets. How the hell am I ever going to
attract a worthwhile female partner, if you are sitting
there realizing that you're ready to shift gears that you
want to become your best, most authentic, most confident, most
capable, most open, most abundant man, I invite you to
apply for high performance male, my coaching program, it is where
I put all of my years of experience coaching men, helping
them to develop an innate sense of confidence and innate sense
of knowing who they are what they deserve in the world, and
turning that up to an 11 so that they can attract their ideal
female partner, whether or not they're already married to her.
In fact, highperformance male starts with a module on
confidence, because that is how important confidence is for men
living in today's world, navigating workplaces,
navigating romantic and sexual relationships, when you bring
confidence into the bedroom, and you bring confidence into the
boardroom. And you know, deep down to your core, that you
truly are the amazing, authentic expressed man that you were born
to be.
I mean, is there anything in life that's more powerful than
that? I don't think so. Remember, just like any habit,
you can shift your mindset you are not born with these
mindsets, you are not going to die with these mindsets unless
you choose to because now you know better. I am Caitlin V. And
let me lead by example by telling you how grateful I am to
you for watching, for subscribing, for tuning in
today. I love you so much. I believe in you so deeply. You
have thought this boom boom.