[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
[Applause]
raise your hand if you can find the
country of Burma on a map all right well
if you can't it's a little bit of a
trick question
it's called Myanmar today so I find
myself in Burma now Myanmar at ten years
old and this is when my overseas
adventures began when my father was
stationed at the American Embassy there
and at a special event for foreign
dignitaries I was introduced to the
Russian diplomat and he immediately
wrapped me in a warm embrace of a
smothered in his white military uniform
and it was then that I received my very
first true Russian bear hug now this was
a period of time that you may remember
as the Cold War when Russians were the
evil other but a bear hug changed all
that for me my name is Jennifer Richmond
and today I work as an international
relations specialists since my time in
Myanmar I've lived in five countries and
I've worked in twenty others and I've
learned how to connect to people very
different from me for example in my
overseas work and travel
I was recently helping American clients
find foreign investors and that took me
to India during the neva T holiday
now during neva tea you danced for nine
nights and so I danced holding hands
with strangers who became friends who
became investors now as a Texan it's
pretty much assumed that I like iced tea
but my appreciation of tea started in a
faraway land and as I close my eyes
right now I can still feel the firm
touch of Japanese hands Tainan o be
around my waist to wear a kimono for a
traditional tea ceremony and then there
was a time that I received the blessings
of Ganesh the half man half elephant god
of wisdom from a Hindu priests touch on
my forehead at a temple in India our
differences abound but through
experiences like a common touch I
developed relations
ships that I continue to carry with me
today but we don't need to travel
overseas to have these experiences
another pop quiz for you how many
languages are spoken in American homes a
243 B 352 or C 497 according to the US
Census Bureau as of November 2015 there
are over 350 languages spoken in
American homes so if you guessed B you
got it
and Kenneth Pruitt a former director of
the US Census Bureau in a PBS interview
said we are on our way to becoming the
first country in history that is
literally made up of every part of the
world America is truly a nation of
differences while working for a global
intelligence firm understanding these
differences and how they led to conflict
was part of my job description and so I
kept my finger on the pulse a political
disruption around the globe
I was once even accused of helping start
a small-scale revolution in China called
the Jasmine Revolution yeah my son
thinks that's kind of cool I let him
know I didn't do it but he still
entertains the thought that maybe I
might be a James Bond kind of a mom and
he even wrote us a letter letting us
know that he too had become a secret
agent
it's so easy to focus on our differences
and see them as obstacles but finding
the common threads and our differences
is what I see as the foundation for the
great American multicultural experiment
it's how we weave ourselves together
into one nation it is the United in the
United States of America and today I
find myself troubled by our growing
differences in political views and I
started to wonder could my experiences
overseas make a difference here at home
these divisions really hit home for me
when I saw my son struggling to navigate
our families different political
ideologies and sadly I don't think I'm
alone here I don't think I'm the only
one who's had a Cold War break out among
their family and among their friends so
let's pause for a second and ask
ourselves how did we get here according
to a 2018 Rasmussen Reports survey of a
thousand American voters about a third
think another civil war is likely Wow
digest that for a second and part of our
growing division stems from geographical
differences a 2014 Pew study showed that
we are self sorting into more liberal
urban areas and more conservative rural
and suburban areas now let's add the
digital neighborhoods we inhabit
according to a 2019 hidden tribes report
social media reinforces our existing
opinions and worldviews elevating the
loudest voices in limiting genuine
interpersonal interaction to those who
may think differently we live near
like-minded people we spend our time
online with other like-minded people
well maybe no wonder we're out of touch
connecting with those who think
differently speak differently and vote
differently and despite being uber
connected it turns out were probably
lonelier according to a 2019 American
Psychological Association study serious
distress and suicidal outcomes increased
71% among those aged 18 to 25 between
2008 and 2017 this is not okay with me
and I don't think I need a
pop quiz - no it's not okay with you
either so what do we do about this loss
of connection to people in general and
especially people different from us my
experiences have shown that indeed we
you and me can take steps to build
relationships heal divisions and maybe
even save lives when my son was in third
grade we came up with one solution we
started a penpal exchange with his
school in a school in Vietnam he
couldn't believe that his Vietnamese
penpal liked pizza pizza it was such a
small connection but its impact was huge
it's time we reboot how we connect and
that is as simple as a few heartfelt
words in a letter really you might be
asking really can it be as simple as a
note about pizza really I think it can
in a world of dizzying technology
something so analog so basic may be
exactly what we need to reboot and
reconnect to our common humanity let me
share with you how I reboot for me it
kind of starts like a journal and there
are numerous studies showing the
benefits in journaling in fact James
Pennebaker
a psychologist at the University of
Texas and a 1988 American Psychological
Association study found that personal
journaling was not only a stress
management tool but it also strengthened
immune cells among other health benefits
so words from the heart really can heal
both mentally and physically do you want
to know who else Journal here's a short
list of a few notables Albert Einstein
Marie Curie John F Kennedy I to be Wells
Chris Martin and of course Anne Frank
add yourself to this list and think
about taking it one step further imagine
what could happen if you turn your
journal entries into letters or notes
you get the benefits of journaling for
yourself and maybe you touch someone
else now I want to ask you to remember
back to the last time you received a
handwritten letter
note and remember how it made you feel I
recently conducted us poll on social
media which I know super scientific of
me and in this poll I asked my
connections when is the last time they
received a handwritten letter or note
out of 45 people different ages
ethnicities and so on forty percent so
it had been over five years since they'd
received a handwritten letter or a note
and that's not really that surprising a
2018 study by the US Post Office showed
that household correspondences have
declined 61% between 2001 and 2016 but
back to my poll of the 60% that said it
had been within five years since they'd
received a handwritten letter note many
commented that it was a holiday card
thank-you card a letter from church or a
letter from a grandparent and when I
then asked that they like receiving
letters or notes or you know whatever
take it or leave it
everyone expressed their appreciation of
the written word without exception it's
time to reboot how we connect and each
of us can write a few words in this
connection when we share our inner
thoughts our truth our vulnerability
could be the social balm that heals our
divisions with a common touch letters
connect across distance and difference
between cities and countries and between
hearts and minds it really is kind of
magic and in handwritten form you can
actually hold on to these thoughts
physically touch them and save them for
reflection and often they become
memories that we reimagine and passed
down the family tree my family still has
the uncle the letters my great-uncle
wrote while flying overseas during World
War two unlike his plane that was lost
over the Atlantic Ocean
his words remained forever with us but
you're busy I get it right
so start simple start with a note and
then you don't have to worry about
getting a cramp in your hand as you work
back up your handwriting muscles I like
to keep a pack of note cards handy and
sometimes they just serve as a personal
journal and get tucked into a book for
me to revisit later and by the way notes
make great
bookmarks and other times they get
tucked into an envelope addressed and
affixed with a stamp now I have to
confess most of my notes are digital I
do try to write one handwritten note a
week and if I think about it one note a
week and that's 52 opportunities to
touch someone in the year even one a
month and that's 12 opportunities in a
year 24 or two years and so on the time
it takes is just but a few moments but
the impact is timeless now if you need
more inspiration to write a 2014 study
by the association of psychological
sciences shows that writing by hand
results in better performance on
conceptual assessments translation
you're smarter when you're right and the
time has real payback so take the time
to reboot how you connect with just a
few words but you may be thinking all
right well what would I say well what do
you journal about I'm guessing it's
probably not about politics so share
your feelings on a crush or even a
heartbreak or try asking a thoughtful
question my favorite is if you could
have any superpower what would it be for
me it would be that I could speak all
the languages of the world fluently
shocker
I know ask the question yourself and see
what unfolds still need some help how
about this are you a cat or a dog person
me dog definitely dog but more
specifically pugs I mean seriously how
can you be unhappy when you see this
face although I may be the only happy
one in this relationship so you may be
thinking now who do I send it to well my
neighbor may be a good place to start
even if the sign in the yard or the
bumper sticker on their car makes you
cringe
who knows maybe they have a superpower
to share but here's another fun idea I
recently started a letter exchange with
a friend in California my most prolific
pen pal he loves ancestry and as
maps out his family tree he came across
his own shocker George Washington and
even robert e lee or distant cousins and
he encouraged me to do my own search and
I've got to tell you while building my
family tree finding old records like
records of ancestors in the
Revolutionary War and ship records of
ancestors and their passage from
Scotland to America I felt like I was
building up my own family Empire now my
Empire wouldn't rival those found on
shows like Game of Thrones but my Empire
I can access on an app and connecting to
realize relatives across distance and
difference
I now have several new pen pals who call
me cousin and get this my cousin Ann
even writes children's books on unity
and communication so how's that for
coincidence
it must be our DNA and when I was
struggling with writer's block I asked
her advice and she said to take a break
and to listen to princess musicology who
knew a little solo dance party was all
it took to get my groove back and as
Prince sings tea on the wine the mind
and it's probably clear to you by now
that my writing is probably a little bit
better than my dancing so with over 26
million people who have done a
commercial DNA test you're sure to make
a connection and who knows maybe you'll
get some princely inspiration in my
experience with letters there's
something so genuine and written
conversation so rich even more sometimes
than face to face conversation when you
may be worried about the stain on your
shirt
if your fly's unzipped or if you have a
booger in your nose which is my own
personal phobia for yet in a letter like
writing a journal there are no
interruptions instead there's quietness
and purpose I find it easier to share my
real self and for the reader the time
and distance offers a better opportunity
to reflect meaningfully in our day and
age where communication is immediate a
letter is that
deliberate and even rebellious act and
in the time and space created in a
letter relationships are found as our
differences divisions and even
loneliness fade you don't need a Russian
bear hug to touch someone but if you get
the opportunity I do suggest you take it
in a letter you could touch hearts and
minds without even leaving your chair
Anne Frank's journal letters from an
attic travel across time and distance to
inspire us about freedom my uncle still
shares his thoughts with us even years
after his plane was lost at sea and a
cousin's letter shares a key to
unlocking writer's block can you imagine
a world filled with these small human
connections each letter or note
revealing the shared love of pizza hugs
or prints in a letter
we can actively choose peace over war
connection over loneliness we can make a
difference you and me it's time to
reboot how we connect it starts with a
few words it really is just that simple
and now it's your turn I hope you write
me a letter I'll even take a short note
and let me know how it goes
thank you
[Applause]