Who are you?
Why I tied up like this?
Ah, Uncle Roger, I've been sent by Auntie Helen
She's not happy that you've been mentioning her in all your weejios
Auntie Helen? My ex-wife Auntie Helen?
You tell her, I'm not scared of her
Oh really? She knew you were gonna say that
So we have something special plan for you, Uncle Roger
What?
You have to review Jamie Oliver's Thai red curry
No no no
Please please no, tell her I'd do anything she want
So I'm gonna make the most beautiful Thai Red curry with prawns
Lemongrass, in all the supermarkets
Just trim off the ends like that
Lemongrass correct
Come on, review it properly
It's Jamie Oliver, he must have made some mistake
He cut the wrong end
You need to cut the hard end, why you cut the soft end, haiyaa
Jamie, see?
Nephew kidnapper, even he know you fucked up
And then just give it a spank
If you smell it
It's also released that incredible
Why he like spanking thing?
Sherbet lemon sort of smell flavour
Absolutely gorgeous
So I've got the lemongrass
Haiyaa, food processor
Use pestle and mortar
I'm gonna put a heaped teaspoon of tomato puree
What?
To...tomato puree for...
What is this?
A heaped teaspoon of tomato puree
Haiyaa, nobody use tomato puree for Thai red curry, that the wrong thing
Nephew kidnapper, cut off my rope
Uncle Roger want to put my leg down from chair
This must be fastest Uncle Roger ever put leg down from chair
He really is Usain Bolt of fucking up
Nobody use tomato puree for red curry, what is this?
You trying to make bolognese is it?
Then, I'm gonna put four of these roasted peeled peppers
Pepper?
Kinda smokey sweet flavour
Four of these go in
Wrong again
Tomato puree and red pepper
I think Jamie going 'Oh, I'm making red curry today'
Get all red things in kitchen and throw in there
Good thing he not working next to fire extinguisher
He gonna put that in too
Really good, kinda smokey sweet flavour
Four of these go in
And then I've got this bunch of coriander
Coriander...so much?
Big handful stalks
We want coriander root, not coriander
One chilli and then garlic
Wha...
Chili, I'll use one chilli
One chilli...
ONE?!
Remember, niece and nephew
Jamie Oliver making his green curry
He used 3 chillis
And we all know that is not enough haiyaa
One chilli, why even bother?
Red curry like this, one portion, we use 10 red chillis
One chilli?
Use the right amount, not the white amount
And then garlic, 2 cloves of garlic
Haiya, garlic crusher for what?
You gonna blend it all in food processor anyway
Garlic crusher is the whitest invention
Uncle Roger only see white people use it before
Nephew kidnapper, you white
Do you have any garlic crusher at home?
See? what I tell you
Why so white?
So white
And he can't even squash
Ginger
No, wrong, galangal, not ginger
Then I've got a secret ingredient, okay
Lime leaves, incredible
So put about 4 or 5 leaves
Not lime leaves, you want lime zest
Secret ingredient?
If by secret you mean wrong, then you correct
About 4 or 5 leaves of kaffir lime in there
Eh, look so bad
Those beautiful
Gross
Where got beautiful?
About two tablespoons of olive oil goes in
Jamie olive oil, no
Season with soy sauce
What?
1-2 tablespoons should do the trick
Soy sauce?
For your Thai red curry paste?
Who do that? Haiyaa
This is Jamie Olive Oil worst video yet
Nobody put soy sauce in Thai red curry haiyaa
Ok, ok, Uncle Roger, I'm gonna stop this
This video is giving you a heart attack
And I don't want to be a murderer
Don't you dare, don't you dare, nephew kidnapper
We in too deep now
All our ancestor crying
Uncle Roger need to avenge them
Press play, press play
Two tablespoons of olive oil goes in
And I'm going to seasoned with soy sauce
What the hell is this red curry paste?
Where your dry spices?
Where your white peppercorn?
Where your salt? Salt he don't have
And where your shrimp paste haiyaa
Shrimp paste, one of the most important ingredient in red curry paste
Should do the trick but we're gonna adjust that later
And a little bit of fish sauce
Basically a teaspoon of fish sauce
Fish sauce correct
But don't put in blender
Fish sauce you put in when cooking
But credit to Jaime
He using Tiparos fish sauce
That super authentic
1 point to Jamie
So now he at -9999 point
Basically a teaspoon of fish sauce
And a teaspoon of sesame oil
Sesame oil wrong
Look at that
So ugly, so clumpy
So you get all of that out there
Mark Wiens mother-in-low get smoother paste in just 4 pound
It like your food processor not even trying hai...
Jamie Oliver cooking so bad
Even his food processor give up on him
Just bang that on there, so you get all of that out there
In a hot pan, I wanna go a little bit of olive oil
Olive oil again
Wrong again
Paste in here first
All of it
All of it?
Jaime, don't use all of it, save some for your pasta tomorrow
Then I'm gonna go in with the prawns
No...
Frozen prawns, they are perfect, chuck them frozen now
No worries at all
Give them a little shake like that
No...not prawn
You don't just sauté prawn like that
You not making stir fry
Prawn is expensive ingredient and you ruin it like this
Prawn in red curry, you just cook in red curry itself
Like how you cook chicken in Thai green curry
No need to stir fry it first
He wasting prawn
Continue, continue
Give them a little shake like that
I'm also gonna get sugar snap peas
Sugar? no no no no no
Mangetout again
200 gram of the worst vegetable
This guy just love mangetout
Is he sponsored by big mangetout or something
Every curry he put that in there
And 200 gram of this shit
Versus one chilli
Oh my god, what the hell he doing?
Oh man, Auntie Helen is brutal
Yeah, she the most evil bitch
She make Putin feel like Mother Teresa
This just vegetable smoothie now
And then coconut milk
So literally I'm gonna bring this to the boil
And turn it right down to a simmer
And this will be ready in 3 minutes
A little bit of coriander
More coriander?
I thought you chop up the whole forest already
A little bit of lime juice
Lime juice, wrong
So I'm just gonna pour that
This Thai red curry, no Thai, no red, and not curry
Look at this shit
Absolutely gorgeous
This not Thai red curry
This British orange soup
Uncle Roger almost fainted from this
Nephew kidnapper, Uncle Roger done now
Release me!
Hello, who is this?
Hello Uncle Roger, it's Auntie Helen
Release me, you crazy woman
Let me go, what you doing?
Let you go?
Maybe I'll think about it when you get more subscribers
Than Jamie Oliver
No
Niece and nephew. hit subscribe now
Help Uncle Roger get more subscribers than Jamie olive oil
Otherwise I cannot make any more videos for you, haiyaa
I wish I could tighten it myself
This looks more like a sex rope
It does a bit
It looks like lingerie
The thing I do for my niece and nephew
Haiyaa
This my editor
He thinking...
Why the hell I have to do this?
I don't get paid enough for this shit
All part of the job
Yeah yeah, so it looks less lingerie
Torture Garden
It actually looks like I want to be here
Kidnapper roleplay
Yeah we should have gotten.. thicker rope
I do mention the emotional damage guy in my set, so
I could just do a "emotional damage!" from the audience
Yeah, if you want, if you want
Okay
I wouldn't mind, I wouldn't considered that a heckle
I'll bring it, hell yeah
Do it, do it
Oh my god, that's funny
Steven He is here, guys