AEW only officially launched in January last year, but it has already become a viable alternative
to WWE - with their Dynamite show consistently beating NXT.
And, when you spin the demographics just right and squint really hard, Monday Night Raw too.
But there is an alternate timeline where none of that happened: The dark timeline.
Because when rumours of The Young Bucks, Kenny Omega, Cody Rhodes and Tony Khan launching
a wrestling promotion started, WWE did what they do best: they offered them loads of money
to not do it.
Dave Meltzer was the first to report that The Bucks, Kenny and others were offered huge
money deals to join WWE - even offering them creative control of their characters and a
six-month opt-out clause in their contracts.
They of course turned them down, but Matt Jackson told Sean Ross Sapp at Fightful that
the money offers were indeed as big as reported, and that Triple H is so charming that they
thought they may actually sign
with
the company.
It was reported a couple of weeks ago that WWE made the decision to send some of their
greener big guys like Dabba Kato and Omos back to NXT’s Performance Centre - which
sounded pretty reasonable, until we also found out that Keith Lee was on that list too.
The news was not received well by fans, because if WWE genuinely thought Keith Lee - one of
the most captivating wrestlers I’ve ever seen live - didn’t know how to work, the
business is more doomed than we thought.
Dave Meltzer is now reporting, thankfully, kind of, that the reason Keith Lee, Otis and
others were sent back, is because when business is bad - and the record-low Raw ratings would
suggest they are - Vince goes back to what he knows worked in the 80s.
Which means he wants “monster” type characters.
Not monster as in The Fiend, but monster as in the big guy wrestling trope like Braun
Strowman.
Meltzer added, “Historically whenever WWE business is bad, Vince blames smaller guys
on top, but right now, his thought process is he doesn’t have big guys who can work
at that level.”
Someone who is on another level is Charlotte Flair, who returned to WWE this past Sunday
to win the Women’s Tag Team Championships with Asuka [9].
Flair then claimed because of this win, she was now the first-ever women’s Grand Slam
Champion - winning the Raw and Smackdown Women’s Championships as well as the tag and NXT Women’s
title.
However it was pointed out by fans that Bayley, Asuka and Sasha Banks have also done this
and - crucially - did it before her.
But on Raw Talk, Flair doubled down on this claim - pointing out that she was also a former
Divas Champion which makes her “the only and real Grand Slam Champion”.
It’s actually a really good heel character bit.
Which makes it a shame she’s being presented as an out and out babyface.
And speaking of Flair, here’s my review of Raw… in about 5 minutes.
Which, fittingly, began with, and was totally covered in…
The OmniFlair.
And double champion Asuka, I guess.
But mostly Charlotte, look at her with her giant feathery neck.
But their unconvincing best friend hugs were interrupted by former champions Nia Jax and
Shayna Baszler, and then Mandy Rose and Dana Brooke - prompting a No.1 contenders style
match between them.
Dana Brooke actually looked pretty good here, so it was her that Shayna choked out to win.
But Dana and Mandy stood tall by pushing them over the top rope.
Hey, save those post-match angles for the Rumble go-home week.
Charlotte was on commentary for all of this, and came across as a total heel.
It’s not just big monsters and The OmniFlair [QUICK VERSION OF SKIT] that Vince is turning
to with record low ratings though.
There’s also that other break glass in emergency move: old guys.
Because WWE announced Legends Night for when the feelings right, Legends Night, oh what
a night [USE KOOL & GANG KARAOKE TRACK].
Which will feature 20 Legends like Big Show, Ric Flair, Kurt Angle and Hulk Hogan… who
we’ve seen pretty recently… returning names like Carlito and Melina, the latter
of which was reportedly close to going to NXT recently.
And Alicia Fox.
WWE Legend Alicia Fox.
For Fox sake.
The Hurt Business gloated about winning the entire midcard in a VIP Lounge segment, still
subtly teasing the faction getting annoyed with Cedric Alexander’s ego.
One compulsory 24/7 title chase later and Matt Riddle and Jeff Hardy talking about there
being more to life than business.
Like God and marijuana, Lashley and MVP beat them relatively easily in a match - with Bobby
tapping out Jeff yet again.
Angel Garza’s back on Raw!
Remember him?
He was one of the most exciting new stars in WWE at the start of the year.
Now he’s completely flattened out.
He quickly beat Drew Gulak.
Remember Ricochet?
He faced Brock Lesnar for the WWE Championship earlier this year!
Now he’s completely flattened out.
He quickly lost to T-Bar here with a reverse Go To Sleep.
CM Punk to Retribution confirmed.
Remember Jaxson Ryker and his former gimm-actually, no I don’t.
I can never remember what that guy’s old faction was?
He squashed Gran Metalik.
Then it was time for Randy Orton to brag about killing a guy the previous night.
Wearing his Guitar Hero hoodie, he admitted he rather loved murdering people, while the
commentary team were outraged saying he went too far by setting the Fiend on fire twice.
I mean, once is fine.
Once was the rules of the match, once was how you win.
WWE booked that exact stipulation: burn him, but for the love of God only do it once.
Randy, this sick guy, this demented Viper, he set fire to a man - again, perfectly acceptable.
Actually encouraged.
But man, did he go too far when he did it again.
You would’ve thought with all that outrage, WWE might punish him somehow.
A suspension.
A fine.
But Randy, thankfully, is very lucky when it comes to charges of attempted murder.
And Wellness Policy strikes.
But while no Fiend turned up - because you probably should miss at least one week of
TV to sell being killed - Alexa Bliss sure did…
The lights turned on and off to reveal Bliss awesomely sitting in the ring on a swing set
- where she said The Fiend could be many places.
The beach, eating his favourite food BBQ - burning a man alive joke - or he could’ve been absorbed
by the canvas, deep into the ground, to go back to an implied home of hell.
But then she promised if he does come back, he’ll be like nothing Randy has ever seen
before - teasing a new Fiend gimmick, much like how Wyatt himself has by tweeting a photo
of a cocoon on Twitter.
What do you think The Fiend’s new gimmick could be?
Let me know your ideas in the comments where I’ll be replying from outta nowhere pitching
The Fiend with a new hat.
Living up to her OmniFlair gimmick, Charlotte then got a second segment, where Asuka built
to Flair’s hot tag, for her to beat the bickering Peyton Royce and Lacey Evans.
And in the main storyline running through the show, MizTV hosted AJ Styles to apologise
for cashing in his Money in the Bank briefcase.
Miz actually cut such an emotional, heartfelt promo, talking about how he just wanted to
prove to everyone he belongs, that I almost thought he was turning face, but then he only
offered AJ a cameo role in the next Marine movie.
Miz then absolutely confirmed that he’s still a heel by demanding his Money in the
Bank briefcase back - likely setting up a rubbish subplot for him for the next month.
This brought out the babyfaces Shield style to surround the ring while doing their version
of the Nightmare After Christmas, prompting a big brawl where Keith Lee accidentally collided
with Sheamus.
They were still in-fighting when it came to the Holiday Street Fight six man tag of McIntyre,
Sheamus and Lee vs AJ, Miz and Morrison.
They clearly told their story - where Lee worked well with Drew, then Sheamus did the
same, but Lee and Sheamus couldn’t work together - but it was at the expense of the
fun stipulation.
For a festive street fight main event, it was just a normal six man tag until the final
few minutes.
Lee tagged himself in to get the win, so Sheamus Brogue Kicked him to end the show.
What did you think of Raw?
Let me know in the comments down below.
And follow us on Twitter @WrestleTalk_TV to vote in our Poll on a Pole match - where 35%
thought it was Poor, with the ratings definitely trending downwards.
And I agree.
This was a boring episode, especially to follow-up a surprisingly exciting TLC pay-per-view.
All the good stuff definitely seems to be saved for Friday’s episode of SmackDown.
I can only assume WWE are saving their big creative changes for the New Year with Legend’s
night.
This week’s Raw is poor.
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