>> WHEN I SAID WE SHOULD GO OUT TO DINNER SOMETIME, THIS IS NOT
WHAT I HAD IN MIND.
>> James: WELL, LET'S HAVE A LOOK AT WHAT WE'VE GOT HERE.
OH MY WORD.
SO WE'VE GOT JELLYFISH, WE HAVE CHICKEN FEET.
GHOST PEPPER HOT SAUCE.
WE HAVE A BULL PENIS.
A THOUSAND-YEAR OLD EGG.
WHICH I DONE EVEN KNOW HOW THAT'S POSSIBLE.
>> YEAH.
>> James: A FISH SMOOTHIE.
PIG BLOOD CURD.
AND A BALUT, WHICH I DON'T REALLY KNOW WHAT THAT IS. A
>> I DON'T EITHER.
WOW IT ALL LOOKS SO TERRIBLE.
AND I KNOW PEOPLE CAN'T SMELL IT, BUT IT DOESN'T SMELL GOOD
EITHER.
>> James: IT'S REALLY DISGUSTING, IT'S HORRIFIC.
>> THIS FISH SMOOTHIE, IS GIVING OFF-- IT SMELLS LIKE BEING AT
THE BEACH.
>> James: I THINK I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU THE PIG BLOOD CURD.
>> OH BOY.
>> James: OKAY, YOU DON'T HAVE TO ANSWER THE QUESTION.
BUT IF YOU DON'T ANSWER THE QUESTION, YOU HAVE TO HAVE A
BITE OF THE FOOD.
>> OKAY, ALL RIGHT SO YOUR QUESTION IS,--
(LAUGHTER) >> DID I GO TOO SOON?
DID I GO TOO FAST?
I DON'T KNOW HOW THE GAME WORKS.
(
>> James: WELL, THEN I WILL CHANGE IT.
(LAUGHTER) >> NOW THE TABLES HAVE LITERALLY
TURNED.
>> James: IT WILL GREAT TO WASH THAT DOWN WITH GHOST PEPPER HOT
SAUCE.
>> IS THAT REALLY GHOST PEPPER HOT SAUCE?
>> James: I GUESS SO.
>> HOLD ON.
>> James: NO, JIMMY, DON'T.
I'M SCREWED.
>> I SHOULD NOT HAVE SMOKED THAT JOINT BEFORE I CAME OUT HERE.
>> James: ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT SO HERE IS YOUR QUESTION.
>> OKAY.
>> James: JIMMY.
>> YES.
>> James: OF ALL OF THE CURRENT LATE NIGHT HOSTS, WHO IS YOUR
LEAST FAVORITE?
>> ALL OF THE CURRENT LATE NIGHT HOSTS, WHO IS MY LEAST FAVORITE.
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) THIS IS NOT LIKE ELK SPERM OR
SOMETHING S IT?
>> James: IT'S JUST BREAST MILK, THAT'S ALL IT IS. A
>> ALL RIGHT.
>> James: ALL RIGHT.
>> ALL RIGHT, NOW I GET TO ASK YOU A QUESTION.
>> James: YOU CHOOSE WHAT I AM GOING TO EAT.
>> I AM GOING TO-- I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT BALUT IS, I HAVE THE
HICCUPS, I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS BUT I'M GOING TO GO WITH BALUT,
HERE IS THE QUESTION.
WERE YOU AS MISERABLE DOING "CARPOOL KARAOKE" WITH BRITNEY
SPEARS AS IT LOOKED LIKE YOU WERE?
(
>> James: I'M VERY SAD IT LOOKED LIKE THAT.
I WASN'T-- I WASN'T-- I WASN'T MISERABLE AT ALL.
I WASN'T, IT WAS-- I WAS-- I-- IT WAS GREAT.
>> YEAH.
>> WHY WHERE YOU SWEATING WHEN YOU SAY THAT.
>> James: I WASN'T, I WASN'T, I GENUINELY WASN'T, I WASN'T
MISERABLE.
I THOUGHT-- I THINK SHE'S GREAT.
I DO.
>> I JUST WANT TO SEE WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE WHEN A PERSON LIES
RIGHT ON CAMERA.
>> James: NO, NO, I THINK SHE'S GREAT.
(LAUGHTER) ALL RIGHT, I'M GOING TO GIVE
YOU, JIMMY, I WILL GIVE YOU HERE, LET'S CHUCK A BULL PENIS
IN THE MIX, SHALL WE?
>> WOW, I HAVEN'T HAD PENIS IN WEEKS.
>> James: OKAY, ALL RIGHT.
TO THE NEAREST MILLION TO THE NEAREST MILLION, HOW MUCH DO YOU
MAKE A YEAR?
>> WELL, THANK YOU.K THANK YOU FOR THIS DELICIOUS
PENIS, JAMES.
(
PENIS.
YOU HAVE GOT SO MUCH PENIS.
>> YEAH.
>> James: CHEWY.
>> IT'S MORE LIME GUM THAN PENIS.
>> James: A CHEWY GUM PENIS.
>> I NEVER IMAGINED PENIS WOULD BE QUITE THIS CHEWY.
>> James: IF YOU NEED TO SPIT IT OUT.
>> I DO NEED TO SPIT IT OUT.
HAVE A LITTLE BIT OF PENIS.
ENJOY.
HE WON'T EAT MY PENIS.
ALL RIGHT.
>> James: ALL RIGHT, YOU GO.
>> OKAY.
>> James: WHERE ARE WE GOING.
>> CHICKEN FEET.
>> James: OH NO.
>> YEAH.WH ARE YOU A BETTER SINGER THAN
JIMMY FALLON?
OH WOW.
>> James: UH...
>> ARE YOU A BETTER SINGER, SINGING ABILITY ALONE.
>> James: I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU WOULD JUDGE IT.
>> UH-HUH.
>> James: BUT I-- YEAH.
>> YOU ARE, ALL RIGHT.
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) >> James: ALL RIGHT.
OKAY.
>> THIS IS A TERRIBLE GAME.
I MEAN, WHO CAME UP WITH THIS IDEA.
>> James: I'M GOING TO CHOOSE FOR YOU, I'M GOING TO GO FISH
SMOOTHIE.
>> I WAS HOPING YOU WOULD NOT GO WITH THE SMOOTHIE.
>> James: NO, I AM GOING TO GO THOUSAND YEAR OLD EGG.
>> OKAY.
>> James: THOUSAND YEAR OLD EGG.
>> WOW, THAT DOESN'T SMELL CLEAN.
>> James: WHO IS THE CELEBRITY THAT HAS YOUR PHONE NUMBER THAT
YOU WISH DIDN'T.
>> OH, THAT'S A GREAT QUESTION, THAT I WISH DIDN'T.
UM, O.J.
>> James: REALLY?
>> NO.
>> James: I REALLY THOUGHT HE DID.
>> NO, UM, HUH.
I DON'T THINK-- THE HONESTOU ANSWER IS, I DON'T THINK I WOULDSO
GIVE MY PHONE NUMBER TO SOMEBODY THAT I DIDN'T WANT TO HAVE IT.
BUT I FEEL LIKE THAT'S A COP OUT SO I SHOULD EAT THE THOUSAND
YEAR OLD EGG.
SO I WILL.
>> James: YOU ARE A MACHINE, JIMMY.
YOU ARE GOING TO HOST THE EMMYS ON SUNDAY!
>> OH, YOU MIGHT HAVE TO HOST THE EMMYS ON SUNDAY.
>> James: WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO GIVE ME, THIS IS IT, LAST
QUESTION, YOU HAVE TO PICK SOMETHING FOR ME TO EAT, JIMMY.
>> OH YEAH, FISH SMOOTHIE.
>> James: [BLEEP].
>> NAME TWO OF THE CAMERAMEN IN THIS ROOM.
(
>> James: THAT IS A GREAT QUESTION.
(APPLAUSE) >> James: IT IS A DIFFERENT CREW
TONIGHT, ACTUALLY.
(
>> WOW, THAT DID NOT SMELL GOOD.
>> James: THAT WAS "SPILL YOUR GUTS OR FILL YOUR GUTS."
OUR THANKS TO JIMMY KIMMEL!