There's a lot going on in the world right now,
but there is one story that is more important
than all of them combined.
I'm talking about the ongoing saga
of Nicki Minaj's cousin's friend's swollen testicles.
As everyone on the planet has heard by now,
Nicki Minaj tweeted out
that her cousin's friend in Trinidad
took the COVID vaccine,
and then his balls swole
and he became impotent.
Now, people say wild stuff about the vaccine all the time,
but most people don't have tens of millions of followers.
So this tweet has caused a giant uproar
so big that even Dr. Fauci had to weigh in.
I wouldn't normally even ask you about this,
but is there any evidence
that the Pfizer, the Moderna or the J&J vaccines
cause any reproductive issues
in men or women?
The answer to that, uh, Jake, is a resounding no.
There's no evidence that it happens,
nor is there any mechanistic reason to imagine
that it would happen.
Yo, can we just appreciate for a moment
how crazy Dr. Fauci's life has become?
I mean, for the first 78 years of his life,
he was just minding his own business.
You know? Decades working in a lab,
trying to fight diseases.
And now, in the space of two years,
he's had to stop Trump from drinking bleach,
convince Americans he's not trying to microchip them
and now he's weighing in on some Trinidadian guy's balls?
"I can assure you, as the nation's top scientist,
that your nut sack is gonna be fine."
So this story has blown up bigger than a...
I don't know, a pair of Trinidadian testicles.
Because what happened next was that Nicki Minaj said
that the White House read her tweet
and invited her to the White House to talk about it.
But then the White House said, "Nah,
"we just said we would do a phone call
"to answer Nicki Minaj's questions.
We never invited her over."
And that response from the White House
really pissed Nicki off.
NEWSMAN: Nicki Minaj defending her claim
she was invited to the White House
to discuss her concerns about the COVID-19 vaccine.
NEWSWOMAN: Minaj took to Instagram,
saying she would never lie about the invite.
"I'm not lying, guys!
My cousin's friend told me I was invited to the White House!"
Look, I'll-I'll be honest with you--
I-I can see both sides of this thing.
I mean, it would be kind of weird for the White House
to invite Nicki Minaj for that tweet. You know?
'Cause usually someone gets an invite to the White House
for, like, winning a gold medal or saving their entire platoon.
You know? Not for tweeting about their cousin's friend's scrotum.
That's not usual.
On the other hand, Nicki's story makes sense, too.
Why would you lie about going to a house
that's not even as nice as yours?
So I don't think Nicki is lying, necessarily.
It-it was probably just a big miscommunication,
which wouldn't surprise me.
Nicki Minaj and the White House
are from two completely different worlds.
I mean, put on "Monster,"
put on that track, and ask Joe Biden what he hears.
"Hotter than a Middle Eastern climate violet... Dobie?
"M-Matter, I-- You know what? I give up.
Can somebody call Kamala to come help me with this?"
But as pissed off as Nicki Minaj is at the White House,
it turns out a lot of people back in Trinidad
are even more mad at her
for making their country the butt of jokes.
I'm sorry-- the ball of jokes.
...and punch and...
(laughing)
All right. All right. Wait, wait, guys, guys.
Uh, can we just all agree that from now on,
impotence should only be referred to as "a flat tire."
'Cause "erectile dysfunction"-- it's so clinical, you know?
It comes with a stigma.
"I have erectile dysfunction."
But a flat tire-- I mean,
that sounds like something that can happen to anyone.
Yeah, you can pay a guy in a truck $20 to fix it for you.
You know what was crazy is
when we heard this news clip at the show,
we all thought that this guy should be the official voice
of Cialis.
And then, this next part of the story is completely true,
but you're not gonna believe me, and that's fine.
But this new anchor-- his name is Jason Williams--
he is actually my Trinidadian friend's cousin.
Yeah. Cousin, friend, friend, cousin.
So we called him, and we actually got him
to redo the Cialis ads, and honestly,
I think it's a pretty big improvement.
WILLIAMS: Do you or your cousin's friend
have a flat tire?
Well, you don't have to tell everybody.
Just take this thing called "Cialis." Trust me.
It have all the herbs and punch
to bring back your vibes.
So ask your doctor about Cialis.
Just make sure and don't tell
Nicki Minaj 'cause she gonna put you on blast,
and the whole world will know!
Mmm. Now I'm craving Cialis
in doubles. Ooh.
Anyway, the people of Trinidad aren't happy,
the news anchors aren't happy,
and Trinidad's government is definitely not impressed.
"A waste of time."
Health officials in Trinidad and Tobago are responding
to rapper Nicki Minaj-- her claim about the COVID vaccine.
As far as we know at this point in time,
there has been no such reported
either side effect or adverse event.
And what was sad about this is
that it wasted our time yesterday trying to track down,
because we take all these claims seriously.
Oh, man. You think Dr. Fauci has it rough.
The health minister of Trinidad had to spend the whole day
going around asking people about their balls.
How are your testicles? And how are yours?
And how are you balls? Everything fine?
One thing you've got to love about the Caribbean, though,
is how the people there can politely cuss you out
without using a single swear word.
You know, 'cause he seemed chill,
but he was telling her off, you know?
That might have been the most dignified telling off
I've ever heard from a government official.
It made me feel ashamed, and I had nothing to do with this.
I was sitting at home, like,
"Yeah, I should be ashamed of myself."
But I will say this. As funny as the story is--
and we have been having fun with it---
unfortunately, this has turned into a real problem
in a real country, being handled by real health professionals.
And so, we thought at The Daily Show, you know,
it would be great to have these people on the show
to actually find out the full story.
Not from our cousin and not from our cousin's friend,
but from the people who are there
to see what's happening on the ground.
And since we don't actually live in Trinidad,
we thought it would be helpful to have a conversation
with the actual minister of health
for Trinidad and Tobago.
So, Minister Deyalsingh, welcome to The Daily Show.
-Trevor, how are you doing? -I am doing well.
Thank you so much for taking the time today.
I know you have been inundated and I really do appreciate this,
-so... -(chuckles)
I really, really appreciate this.
Anything for an honorary Trini.
(laughs) I try my best.
I have been told if I don't attend the next mass
I'm going to lose my citizenship, so...
Exactly.
Marshall has told me I need to play his band
and make sure that I... that I fit into my outfit
-for the next mass, so... -Lovely.
Um, a few days ago, Trinidad and Tobago
was thrust into the spotlight in not the most favorable way,
because of what could have been an innocuous tweet
if tweeted by anybody else, but Nicki Minaj tweeted something
that has thrust yourself and your team into the spotlight,
and I figured it would be great for you to come on the show
and just to help us work through some of the misinformation
that is swirling in and around the country right now.
So, you held a press conference
that has now gone viral worldwide
where you had to come out and state publicly
that there is no case of...
testic... testicular swelling happening in Trinidad.
Well, vaccine related, at least.
Um, and so I wondered, from, you know,
uh, your ministry's side, do you have any concerns
in and around the vaccine?
Is there anything that has made you say,
"Oh, no, people need to pause,"
or is there a rollout of the vaccine
that you are comfortable with right now?
Thank you for that question.
So, as part of our communication strategy from day one,
we have press conferences every day.
Right now we have them three times a week.
So that was part
of our normal communications, um, process yesterday.
To date, we have administered
over one million doses of vaccines
in a country of 1.4 million people.
We are a small but proud country,
small but proud, and we are confident
that we have brought W.H.O.-approved vaccines
to Trinidad and Tobago.
And with those million doses we have administered to date,
there have been only been five cases of adverse events,
all reported to W.H.O.
None of them includes testicular swelling.
And let me just reiterate, when one weighs that
against the ravages of COVID-19 around the world,
where close to 4.6 million people have, in fact, died,
the advantages of vaccination far, far outweigh
the minuscule risk.
And then, what of Nicki Minaj's further claims
that nobody in Trinidad can work if they are not vaccinated?
Is that true?
I welcome the opportunity to put the record straight.
In simple language, that is simply not true.
Our vaccination program is voluntary
but highly recommended.
Vaccines are not new to the region,
to the Caribbean, to Trinidad and Tobago
and to the... our whole region. This is not new.
What is new is social media,
uh, trying to, uh, throw doubt
on this vaccine.
But globally,
5.83 billion doses of vaccines
have been administered globally.
And it will save lives.
And, Trevor, if you want to come back here to play mas,
-get vaccinated and come back again. -(chuckles)
(chuckles)
I mean, that's a great way to get people to come back.
-Um... -I will personally take you to eat doubles.
I will personally take you for coconut.
I will personally take you to Tobago.
-You know. -So, let me... let me ask you this.
If you were to send a message to Nicki Minaj,
what would that message be?
My message
to the Trinidad and Tobago diaspora,
anywhere that you are,
is that vaccines are safe.
Vaccines are effective.
And I... If I may broaden the conversation
to the Caribbean diaspora.
The Caribbean is one of the best places in the world
to live and play.
It is one of the best places to bring up your families.
My message to the Caribbean diaspora
is spread the word
to get vaccinated to save your life
so we can get back to our Caribbean way of life,
whether it's soccer, whether it's reggae,
whether it's playing the steel pan,
um, all of these lovely things.
Cricket, football. Right?
-Chutney. All these things. -(chuckles)
The way out of this pandemic right now
is simply get vaccinated.
Well, I'll tell you now, Minister,
you had me at doubles and playing mas.
-(laughs) -I'm gonna try to lose a little bit of my COVID weight,
and then I will... I'll be back.
Maybe we'll playing in the same band.
You never know. We'll make it a special occasion.
I believe it, my friend.
And-and my children... are great fans,
-and they will play with you. -Thank you so much.
Thank you so much for taking the time, Minister.
-Appreciate you. -You're welcome, my friend.
Thank you so much again for joining us, Minister Deyalsingh.
Before we go to the break,
um, I just wanted to also say thank you
to the people of Trinidad for being such good sports,
because I know that everything has become a joke these days,
but I hope that everyone remembers that for Trinidadians,
this is a very real thing.
Right? Trinidad is a real place with real people
that is going through a very real pandemic right now,
one that has decimated the economy,
like many countries in the world.
So this issue is something
that they didn't need to be dealing with right now.
And, I mean, not to mention,
when you're from a small country,
it's so easy for one negative story
to define you to the world.
You know, I think Trinidad should be known for its culture,
its food, its Carnival.
You know, not just as the home for one guy's giant gonads.
And as a South African, I get this. You know?
Like when Oscar Pistorius happened,
every time I went to the bathroom after that,
people would run out screaming.
So to all my friends in Trinidad,
thank you for sending me information,
thank you for correcting me
and for keeping me in touch with what was going on.
And to the people of Trinidad, we wish you the best.
We know that this won't be the story that defines you.
And hopefully soon everyone will be vaccinated,
nobody will have swollen testicles
and we'll be back at Carnival celebrating mass.
I mean, I've gained a few pounds during COVID,
but, uh, I still think my outfit is gonna look pretty dope.