Hey Dan here and this video is for you if you are
an ENFP who maybe sometimes has trouble staying on
track. Someone asked a great question on one of my
other videos about having your outcome and
basically working towards it and staying focused
as an ENFP. They asked what systems or tools
or whatever do I have to actually stay on track
and make that happen. Initially nothing came to
mind and then I thought about it a bit more and I
promised I'd make them a video about it. And three
strategies came to mind so the first thing is to
actually clarify what it is you want and be
pretty sure that
Is what you want, you know. For you that may be
weighing the pros and cons, it might be a gut
feeling, that might be thinking through, you know,
let's say you're thinking about settling down in
a relationship and thinking is this really the
guy I want, I've dated those hundreds of other men
and is this the one? Yes, actually this is the
best one so I've decided I wanna stick to it,
right, and that will be then what you want. So you
want to clarify that. I suggest then - step two - write
it down
and have a clear, you know, outcome for yourself in
the case of this example it would be to be with
this person right and to create an awesome
relationship, then you want to also share that
with someone who you respect. Now we all know the
difference between two types of friends you have
the friends that you know you tell them I'm on a
diet and you go out together and you eat a
cheeseburger and a milk shake and there like: Ayh, diets
you know we don't follow diets and you pick
out together...those friends are cool but we also
have those friends where you know you're kind of
scared to tell them when you cheated on your diet
because you really respect what they think about
you. And there's someone who's quite disciplined
and follows through and all that kind of stuff.
Tell that kind of friend, the friend who you want
to hold you in high regard and who calls you on
your sh*t when you lie to yourself, tell that kind
of friend. Alright, so step one, we clarified, step
two, we wrote it down. We told a friend whose
opinion of us we really care about. Step number
three: Self talk. Self talk is an awesome tool you
can use to keep yourself on track. I do this all
the time to the point where I'm actually going to
film another video called Does this make me crazy
and talk about
self talk and how I actually use it on a day to day
basis but also in the long run to stick to goals
and all that kind of thing. Self talk is exactly
what it sounds like. It is talking to yourself and
it's a great tool because it can pull you out of
your head, you know, I don't know if you had the
experience where you're sort of in the moment and
you're thinking through all these thoughts and
they're all over the map you can only kinda talk
one voice at a time and I find that actually
speaking out loud to myself and saying: Hey what
is your goal?
Let's review it. This is what I want - yes or no? Is
that still true? It is true. Cool, so let's ignore
that little voice that popped up in my head or
that emotion I had in the moment and let's follow
through on what I said I would do, right?What did
I write down, what did I tell my friend is that
important to me? Yes, okay, let's follow through on
that. Now I don't use self talk to reevaluate my
decision every time I have an emotional impulse I
don't go and say: Okay let's debate through this
again. I don't reconsider the decision. This is
really important. Step one: you make your decision
for what it is you want. Step two and three are to
reinforce that decision and help you come back to
it. If you want to question that decision due so
once a month at a scheduled time, not every seven
minutes or every 13 seconds when your hormones
kick in and you're emotional and you're like: Oh man, I
don't know if I should still do this, I wanna
change my business, I want no schedule and time
once a month so maybe this is like the fourth
strategy - if you want to question yourself
schedule that in and say: Okay Sunday the first
I'm gonna question myself and be impulsive and
let my emotions run wild and then here's the
Is every time you start to question your path or
change directions or change your mind you can use
self talk and remind yourself - nope, crazy version
of myself, I scheduled Sunday the first to
question everything. Today I'm going to work, I'm
going to get my stuff done like I committed to
and promised myself and then on the first I'll
spend the whole day questioning everything and
probably still end up committed to what I wanna
do because it's what I really want to do but I'll
give myself that,
question it, all these other days are for doing
are for action. They are not for questioning what
it is I actually want to do so ultimately that is
my strategy for staying on track and keeping
focused on what it is you really want to do. Give
it a try and let me know in the comments how it
works for you and does this make me crazy. I can't
be the only one who talks to myself like that, right?
Thanks for watching I'm publishing new videos
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Ciao!