romantic comedies better known as rom-coms have long been a hollywood staple typically
serving up lighthearted fair to love starved audiences but the genre is also guilty of
perpetrating toxic stereotypes and encouraging unhealthy behaviors moreover the chances of
these trends changing anytime soon are as likely as harvey weinstein getting out of prison and
green lighting your screenplay although classics like annie hall and when harry met sally are
universally cherished moviegoers have also had to endure cringe-worthy films that border
on crimes against humanity yes jiggly we're talking about you so without any further ado
let's today look at the top 10 things that rom-cons get wrong
number 10. love at first sight theoretically it's possible to feel a flood of emotions when gazing
at someone for the first time but it's usually just lust or curiosity that first grabs our
attention love however is a complex beast mixed metaphorically speaking hitting a home run at the
very first kentucky derby is the staff of dreams meaningful relationships often require extra
innings relying on more than just performance in the saddle to determine compatibility
for example in sleepless in seattle meg ryan's character doesn't even need a visual cue
instead she dumps her fiance and falls head over heels for tom hanks's voice sure this 90s classic
is undeniably winsome but that doesn't justify questionable morals and speculative actions
9. happily ever after occasion leopold kate is a big city go-getter it's meg ryan again who spoiler
alert must travel back in time at the end of the film to get her man she eventually falls into the
arms of an impossibly charming duke hugh jackman and presumably lives happily ever after although
waltzing in the 19th century may seem whimsical it's a safe bet a fiercely independent woman
like kate won't appreciate her limited career opportunities nor not being allowed to vote
for that matter sadly kate and leopold would probably end up being more like sid and nancy
in a chicago tribune article exploring romantic myth sociologist chantelle tibbles has this to say
about hollywood endings reality is not so seamless tragedy happens life happens people just grow in
different directions number eight makeover magic sometimes all it takes is a new do and a touch of
makeup to find true love well at least in the rom-coms anyway from dowdy to dazzling we've
all seen this strategy deployed in countless films such as clueless princess diaries and
miscongeniality the main flaw with the strategy is that attractive actors are made to look homely
before their transformation from caterpillar to butterfly anyone who's ever cohabited is
fully aware that bed head and morning breath are all part of the deal in short couples willing to
accept their partner's true self a better chance of staying together awards and all 7. love
conquers all not unlike superglue this well-worn trope claims that a simple four-letter word can
fix anything the rom-con cannon has repeatedly taught us that he or she can cheat have a criminal
record lousy credit bad breath bad manners and a terrible taste in music but it simply doesn't
matter because of love unfortunately reality tells a different story a substantial drop in males
attending college has led to a mating crisis that not even love can remedy women now make up nearly
60 of us college students at gender gap that's only getting wider according to nyu professor
scott galloway popular dating apps reveal that men holding college degrees receive far more attention
than those without higher education as a result quoting galloway you have the most dangerous
person in the world who's a broken alone male and we are producing too many of them the mating
inequality that's going to come out of this death of men in college poses an existential risk to
our economy and our society number 6. stalking is harmless the adage if at first you don't succeed
try and try again is perfectly acceptable with regards to finding a job or competitive sport but
when it comes to relationships movies often take a more militaristic tone hunt down the target by
air land or sea until they eventually wave the white flag this is not only a depraved message
but it could also have grave consequences a 2015 study at the university of michigan revealed
that women who watched films such as something about mary become more tolerant of aggressive
male behavior in the report author julia r lipman suggests that several popular rom-coms feature men
and women characters with similar tendencies as stalkers quote i was inspired to pursue this
research by observing that stalking often seems to be trivialized in our culture this depiction of
relentless pursuit is especially dangerous because it can encourage women to discount their instincts
number five being single is for losers one of the most egregious misrepresentations found in
rom-coms is the notion that singles can never achieve happiness apparently all personal and
professional achievements overwhelmingly pale in comparison to one's relationship status for
example in bridget jones's diary renee zellweger plays the frumpy eponymous character obsessed with
not dying fat and alone she ultimately becomes trapped in a messy love triangle and must endure a
series of awkward boozy humiliations along the way common sense dictates that she'd be far better off
alone based on helen fielding's best-selling novel the film trilogy also shows the normalization of
sexual harassment in the workplace in a recent interview fielding said that she wouldn't have
been able to write the story now and the amount of sexism made it quite shocking for me to see how
things have changed since then 4. the soulmate theory hopeless romantics are quick to embrace
this warm and fuzzy concept believing that they're ideal matches out there waiting for them but do
soul mates actually exist well maybe they do maybe they don't and that's all tinsel town needs to
keep peddling this feel-good fodder to the popcorn munching masses with fables like serendipity and
only you miriam webster defines a soulmate as a person who is perfectly suited to another
in temperament nonetheless some top level shrinks warn that the most blissful unions still take lots
of hard work to stay on track this expectation paves the way for significant disappointment
says sabrina romanov phd a clinical psychologist at lenox hill hospital in new york city quote
instead replace the idea of finding your soulmate with creating one through years of learning about
them navigating challenges creating a family and loving each other through all the happy and
hard times number three contra affairs fade in boy meets girl boy flirts with girl over a few
drinks in a dimly lit bar we learn that she's studying for her masters in english lit well
he can barely scribble his name in the mud with a stick regardless they fall madly in love proving
opposites attract after all and roll credits looks and sexual chemistry tick two important boxes but
dating experts are quick to point out that people with multiple shared interests have much greater
odds of staying together they don't have to agree on everything but those with radically disparate
backgrounds are often doomed that is unless julia roberts shows up on screen in pretty woman roberts
plays a hard luck hooker who manages to snare a handsome wealthy businessman richard gere a decade
later the oscar-winning actress starred in notting hill ostensibly portraying herself and becomes
smitten by a lovable but hopelessly ordinary bookshop owner played by rom-com regular hugh
grant in a juicy bit of trivia grant was arrested in 1995 for solicitation of a prostitute 2. the
big day for something that has a 50 50 chance of ending in failure marriage is a risky wager movies
however present a more optimistic outlook leading us to believe that weddings are the culmination
of life's ultimate goal to be celebrated with the same pomp and ceremony as the olympics world cup
and super bowl sunday all rolled into one event just remember folks please gamble responsibly
getting hitched is supposed to be a joyous event bringing family and friends together for the big
day so with love in the air followed by food drinks and dancing what could possibly go wrong
well everything the silver lining of course is the bounty of theatrics from which filmmakers can
draw to amuse us whether it's a fire breathing bridezilla or a pair of fun-loving womanizers
crashing the party these tying the knot plots include bride wars bridesmaids seven brides for
seven brothers the wedding planner my best friend's wedding the big wedding and my big
fat greek wedding 1. fighting equals passion nobody wants to sit through a movie featuring
two characters who blissfully agree on everything and never experience a moment of discord as every
hacked screenwriter knows conflict is an essential ingredient for creating drama and a compelling
narrative that said tension between two lovers can be successfully depicted in many ways moonstruck
is a good example without having them scratch and claw at each other like alley cats for two hours
straight fact relationships can be challenging fiction incessant fighting merely reflects a
burning passion couples who constantly tussle will usually part ways and seek less hostile mates you
know just like bonobo apes do scientists vanessa woods and brian hair spent 15 years in central
africa comparing bonobos to the more aggressive chimpanzees their findings were nothing short of
astonishing the landmark study makes a convincing argument that we might have entirely misunderstood
darwin's idea of survival of the fittest and the role of alpha males quote bonobos have never been
seen to kill another bonobo the primates were able to successfully evolve by forming a society
built on peacefully co-existing especially young females backs of physical violence are simply not
tolerated and quote the friendliest males were the ones that had the most offspring because
the females preferred them that's hair so i really hope you found that video interesting if you did
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