(upbeat music)
- Strongly agree. - Strongly disagree.
- Somewhat agree. - Somewhat disagree.
- I would agree. - Disagree.
- I hate that every week, I have to inject my hormones,
like I get so angry that cis people get it for free.
- I know! - And it's just natural.
- Like you've got in your body, like I got it in a drawer.
(light music)
- [Producer] I would date a cisgender individual.
Three, two, one.
(tense music)
- I've dated cis people in the past
and every time, especially because I'm
assigned female at birth and nonbinary,
if I'm dating a man, he typically just sees me as a woman.
I saw a TikTok literally yesterday,
it was like, "Have y'all ever been with a they/them woman?"
I was like, that is so no. - Oh my gosh.
- If you can't see me as nonbinary,
I cannot be seen outside with you.
Like with women that are cis, it's more welcoming,
but they perceive us as a lesbian couple
and that's not what really what I'm trying to do.
- At my age, boys kind of come into themselves
and their desires and it's just weird because
they either want one thing or another thing
and usually I'm subject to be fetishized.
Some guys will come at me and be like,
"Yeah, you're like the best of both worlds,"
and I'm like, "Girl, this is not 'Hannah Montana.'"
I am a girl.
I want to have my own little moment where
I could just get my own Prince Charming
and stuff like that and just have a normal relationship
like the rest of these cis girls.
- For me, I normally have dated cis girls.
I've been fetishized probably a couple times,
like they say, "Oh, yeah, I'm bi,"
and they see me as a girl or something.
It's so bizarre.
But I've only recently ever dated someone who's not cis
and they identify as nonbinary and
that relationship taught me so much
because I feel like they really saw me for who I am
and they were the most aware person.
- I've only been with one cis person
and it was a girl and I feel like,
if anything, girls are super understanding.
But I'm still open to a cis person.
It depends on the person, really,
like I'm not looking for a trans person,
I'm just looking for a good person.
- [Producer] You should be able
to medically transition before adulthood.
Three, two, one.
(tense music) - A lot of us,
we have realized that this is what's best for us as kids
and it's all about your mental health and wellbeing,
but, also, that being said,
I think it's also important that
this is what you really want
because it's going to be a life-changing decision
and behind that, there should be a lot of
evaluations and a lot of affirmations.
- That's basically what I was gonna say.
- Yeah, me too. - It's like,
it depends where you're at.
You have to be at a certain place
and make sure you're really ready,
but I do think it would help
so many trans kids' mental health
if they were able to transition before 18.
- I'm dying to get on hormones and
I do agree that kids should be able to
get hormones and go through HRT,
but there's also a little part of me that's like,
what if they end up changing their mind?
- Like when I was 13, I thought I was a trans man
and then I was like, nah.
And then I was like, wait.
So for me, it was a lot of questioning
and going through different identities
until I found what felt right
and at the point I'm at right now,
I don't even know if I want to go on HRT.
So if I would've went on that when I was on 13,
I don't know, I don't think I would've regretted it,
but I'm glad that I internalized a lot of it
and went through it within myself.
- I think so long as we educate children
on the risk on transitioning very young,
like medically transitioning very young
and they're educated on the process,
I think children should be able to choose
whether or not they want to transition young.
- [Producer] My teachers are accepting of my pronouns.
Three, two, one.
(tense music)
- I went to UCI for a quarter and
they were very understanding and
they don't really ask questions,
but in high school, it was definitely a struggle
because my name was a different name on the roster
and then I would have to explain,
especially with my Spanish teacher,
she had such Catholic beliefs
and she would pull me aside and ask questions
and it was really sweet of her to try and understand,
but it was also hard for them to remember
in class and stuff like that, so it was kind of a struggle.
- I'm honestly really thankful that
they really did try to find a way to make trans people feel
a bit more comfortable in the school.
Like right now, I'm taking a ballet and Pilates class
and I totally thought it was gonna be,
"Oh, but you're born male,
"so you have to do masculine-presenting stuff,"
which I was really afraid of,
but I'm so glad that they're really accepting.
- I go to UC Berkeley right now
and I get misgendered there on a daily basis.
I will introduce myself to the teacher
and I'll be like, "I go by they/them pronouns,
"by the way, I'm nonbinary, please respect my pronouns,"
and within two times that I'm in the classroom,
they'll go back to using she/her pronouns
and other classmates will also misgender me
and it gets just really mentally taxing at a point
and so I kind of just stop trying as much
'cause it's just mentally exhausting
having to realize no one sees you as nonbinary
because you still have feminine qualities about yourself.
- [Producer] I have come out more than once.
Three, two, one.
(tense music)
- I've come out multiple times.
Not just for my trans experience,
but for my sexuality as well 'cause
I came out as pansexual, then I came out as bi,
and then I just came out as nonbinary
before I came out as trans, I'm like, oh my god,
when am I gonna get it right, y'all, like.
- Yeah, same, I think I went through
four or five different sexualities
and then I was like wait (laughs).
And then I just feel like presenting more androgynous,
it is this struggle of coming out every day
and being like, "Hey, I know I look this way,
"but this is what I am, this is how I feel."
And you can respect it or not, like honestly.
I feel like it's just gonna be forever.
- I kind of feel like I have to come out every single day
just like with the new people I meet in my life,
I'm constantly having to be like, "Oh, yeah,
"my name's Mandy, I'm nonbinary, I go by they/them pronouns,
"please respect those pronouns
"or this is not a safe space for me."
- I get telling people on a daily basis,
like anyone you meet, like I want people to know immediately
that I'm trans 'cause I don't want to bring it up later on
and have it be an issue with them.
I feel like I only came out once
because after the first time, I kind of made it visible
and I didn't want to talk about it,
I didn't want to have to come out again
and I thankfully had very supportive people in my life
that I could've came out to again,
but I felt a lot more comfortable
just kind of living my life and having people
just accept what I'm doing with my life
without coming out again.
- [Producer] Cisgender individuals
do not understand my struggles.
Three, two, one.
(tense music)
- Personally, my friends try to empathize
and I really appreciate that for them.
But personally, I think that cis people
take for granted their gender euphoria.
Getting ready in the morning and looking at yourself
and having the absence of distress,
like when I get up and I get ready
and I look at myself, physically,
I'm distressed, I don't look like the person
I was just dreaming I was, you know?
- Like I've known people that were cis
and would kind of be transphobic towards me
and after a few years, they start transitioning
and they're like, "Oh, I understand now."
And it wasn't until they were going through it
and really felt the pain of it
that they were able to understand.
- I try to think of just the whole entire spectrum
of just cis people who are identifying female,
but for some reason their bodies present more masculine,
I feel like they can have that sort of point of view
that can help them sympathize and empathize for you more.
It's all about the spectrum and just how
there's just so many nuances.
- [Producer] Life would be easier if I wasn't trans.
Three, two, one.
(tense music) - My whole thing is
I'm already a person of color.
If I wasn't nonbinary, I'd be a woman,
so life is not gonna be easy for me.
I just feel like it wouldn't be the same,
but it wouldn't be necessarily easier.
- I mean, I agree with what you're saying about
being a person of color and being queer,
but, you know, I've been through so much
horrible shit and, personally,
my life would be easier if I was cis.
I mean, a defining part of
who I am is definitely being trans,
but every day, I do wonder what if I was actually
born a cis female, you know?
- Yeah, I hate that I still think a lot of the time,
like I wonder what life would be like if I was cis
or I kinda wish I was cis.
Like I know I wouldn't be where I am
and I wouldn't know almost anyone in my life
if I wasn't trans and if I didn't go through the struggles
I went through.
I hate that every week I have to inject my hormones,
like I get so angry that cis people get it for free.
- I know! - It's just natural.
- Oh my god! - Like wait.
- And there's times where my insurance is being annoying
and I can't get my hormones.
- Yeah, you've got it in your body,
I got it in a drawer. - Yeah.
It's really, really hard and breaks me down,
but I know that I wouldn't be who I am if I wasn't trans.
- Yeah, just bouncing off that.
Just the thought of waking up and not having dysphoria
about something and not trying on 15 different shirts
because my chest doesn't look flat enough
or just stuff like that,
I think it would generally make my life easier,
but again, it's like I wouldn't meet the people
that I have in my life and I'm so grateful for them.
- [Producer] And that will be it.
So give yourselves a round of applause.
(all clapping) (gentle music)
- I'm proud to be a citizen of my country.
♪ Proud to be an American ♪ (all chuckling)