hi welcome back to an all new video if you are new here hi hello my name is carrie nice to meet
you and if you've been here before welcome on back to my channel today we are going to be discussing
big life changes in life and all of the feelings that come up when we go through these changes
which are a lot of different feelings and change is inevitable as human beings thank you so much
to better help for sponsoring today's video and let's get into the conversation as most
of you know but some of you may not know my husband and i have been living in new zealand
for a little bit over three months now we made the big decision to move to new zealand back in 2019
but of course because of covid we had to wait a bit longer than we expected and we were able to
make it here january of this year as we go through life there are different things that come up for
us whether it be opportunities that we create for ourselves or something that just comes up along
our path that we can go down that road or not we get to make the decisions and i think what can be
really scary about being a human being is that we are really the ones that are in charge of
our story and of course i feel like faith and the universe play into these decisions a lot i
believe in that heavily but i also know that we are in charge of the choices that we make and
that can feel really daunting and that can feel like a lot of responsibility in life
we have to make a lot of choices there might be opportunities that we've created for ourselves
or opportunities that kind of have fallen in our path and what road we decide to take is a
big decision and these are big choices in life and that feels like a lot of responsibility sometimes
what choices we make in life are going to obviously dictate our life story and that can make
huge impacts whatever this big life change might be for you it could be going through a big breakup
it could be switching career paths it could be moving cities whatever it might be with these more
difficult decisions that you're making of course you're going to have these more difficult emotions
coming up but also within that you're going to be creating a space for incredible growth as a human
being and so much opportunity for yourself that you didn't even realize existed one of the first
complicated emotions that came up for me when we decided to move to new zealand was self-doubt and
a lot of questioning myself i knew that it's what my heart wanted but my mind kept questioning my
heart which i think is really common for us as people if you notice the light is changing in
this video it's because the weather is actually changing right before my eyes and that happens
a lot here in new zealand it can be a sunny day and then it can get overcast and then it can rain
on the drop of the hat some of you watching right now may have followed along on my moving
countries series where i brought you guys along in preparing to move to new zealand and within
those videos i candidly spoke to you guys about how i had recently started seeing a therapist
and i had thought about seeing a therapist so many different times throughout my life but i guess
i always told myself that my problems weren't problems enough to see a therapist which i know is
so silly and ridiculous to think about now there were so many different times throughout my life
that it would have benefited me but i felt like if there was ever a time like now was the time while
i was making this huge life decision because i had so many questions and anxieties and stress
around this big life change and i really wanted to talk to somebody outside of my direct circle and
not only did i get to work through the feelings that i was experiencing right then but i also was
able to go back and talk to her about different things that i had experienced through life and it
just felt extremely liberating for me and that's why i'm so happy to be working with betterhelp to
create this video for you better help is available for clients worldwide which is
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it's not self-help it is professional counseling done securely online better help is
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obviously therapy it's like dating you want to find the right person for you to talk to
so better help makes this easy by making it free to change counselors if needed i love that better
health just wants you to start living a happier life today so you can visit betterhelp.com
rad that's better help h e l p dot com slash r a d and join over one million people taking
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of your first month with better help by going to betterhelp.combrad i will put the link to
it in my description box i have decided to move inside because my camera was just getting too
hot it kept turning off because the sun was just beating right on it it was just too hot huh oh yes
a brene brown quote that i really love is loving ourselves through the process of owning our story
is the bravest thing we will ever do and that's why i think talking about self-love and owning our
story and accepting our story and what we want out of our life is so important when we're making big
changes and going through these pivotal moments in our lives because it can be really easy to listen
to other people's opinions right people that we love people that are really important to us in
life might say little comments here or there or say big things to really try to urge you into one
direction or the other and then at the end of the day that's not your choice or you're going to not
make this change because of someone else and that will live within you for the rest of your life
now these big changes don't have to be positive ones big changes can be difficult changes like
going through a big breakup i went through a huge breakup when i was in my early 20s it was the best
decision that i've made one of the best decisions that i've made because it's led me to where i am
here today which is where i'm supposed to be and where i am so extremely happy and i wouldn't have
been able to meet the love of my life if i didn't make that choice but during the time it felt
right but wrong you know because it was hard and there are choices that we make in life where
our heart knows it's right but our mind questions everything the more we're taking care of ourselves
through the process of change the more grounded we're going to feel which is going to help us
make the decisions the right decisions that we feel are right for ourselves through the process
the next feelings that come up when dealing with big life changes at least for me were fear and
guilt and guilt was really interesting for me because i did not expect that very much so at
all now for me of course because i was moving to a new country guilt was involved in that
but guilt set in more than i thought it would and it was really interesting because a couple
days ago i posted onto my stories and i asked my viewers what you guys would like to see around
self-love and i got so many responses about guilt obviously there are tons of different
reasons why people can experience guilt in their life and sometimes your guilt is very valid
but when you're making a big choice in life and it's something that you want to do but guilt sets
in it can be so complicated because it's what you want to do but you are thinking about other people
through the process and how they are going to feel about your decision and this is very much so
when it comes to moving countries but it also exists and like i mentioned before a breakup
it exists in changing career paths maybe your parents wanted to do something and you've decided
you want to do something else so it can exist in so many different areas of life and when we make
these big leaps into a different direction and for me i have had to work through it in a way of
realizing that your path and your heart and where your heart is trying to take you is where you're
supposed to be going and fear there can be some pretty scary times when you're making big changes
one brene brown again i love her quote that i really love is faith is a place of mystery
where we find the courage to believe in what we cannot see and the strength to let go of
our fear of uncertainty fear and uncertainty are best friends when we don't know the outcome
of something we're going to be fearful of it and what i've really been paying attention to
in my life right now is to embrace the uncertainty and to look at uncertainty as opportunity
and when we make this mindset shift it can truly change everything it can change our
life completely we still have a lot of uncertainty around our future here in new zealand and a couple
months ago i was stressed and i was anxious about just wanting to know where we're going to end up
and what our place will look like we're still here at alex's family batch we've been looking at tons
of different pieces of land and property and different areas of new zealand that we
want to live and nothing has felt completely right yet we've seen things that we would love
but also the market is crazy just like everywhere all over the world right now
i had a mindset shift where i realized that there is beauty and uncertainty and you really have to
kind of train your mind to think this way but it does change your life when you wake up in
the morning your daily thought isn't what is today going to hold because on a daily basis we
don't know what the future holds we don't know what each hour will hold anything can change
and i think we just have to lean into the mystery of that what i've noticed about myself was once
i was able to shift my mind into realizing that the mystery of the future is actually a positive
thing and it provides opportunity i was able to start living more present and more intentionally
because i wasn't constantly having anxiety about the future i was much more in my world at that
moment thinking okay i'm here right now how can i make this moment this time that i'm in right now
the best it can be for myself right and for the people that i love around me how can i embrace
what i'm going through right this second and stop skipping to the next part of my story
life is not easy it's quite complicated and i know that you guys know that
um but i'm just saying that kind of matter-of-factly and over the last
year it's been more complicated than ever before it's also made us all take a step
back and think about how we are living life how we were living life that were there were so many
people just going okay this is like this was not serving me you know this overworking myself or
over analyzing my future or you know all these things that we all just kind of have to go like
are we okay like we all have to kind of check in with ourselves make sure we're good
make the big changes where they need be and trust in the process trust ourselves and trust
our hearts and that's kind of the moral of the story here and i guess that that's what i wanted
to talk to you guys all about because a lot of your feedback you know you guys told me you wanted
to talk more about self-love stuff and when i asked about the topics a lot of it had to do with
navigating all of these crazily things that we have to go through in life and i like to just
candidly chat with you guys sometimes and check in with you and let you know how i'm feeling
and how my heart is too and like um you know i was vulnerable in this video about you know where i've
been and how i've felt too and how i've kind of overcome that and i hope that that helps you guys
in your journeys even if they look different than mine and change is inevitable but change is so
difficult for so many people even the the internet never likes change you know like they'll have
a content creator or influencer for lack of a better term um that they love to follow and
then change will happen and then people will feel so weird about the change like maybe you
know the content creator is a mom now or is you know left a certain like group that they were in
and now they're doing their own thing whatever it might be people don't normally love change um but
it's inevitable and i think that what's important is remembering that people who are going through
change are actually going to grow so much and if anything it's better to stick around with those
people who are going through change because they're going to be able to offer you so much more
than they were before because of just being out of their comfort zone out of their element of comfort
and just being able to like spread their wings and become something become what they're supposed to
be so i want to say thank you for sticking around and embracing this change and being so supportive
throughout this process it uh feels really special because of course i thought of you guys when i
was making this big leap of faith and i wondered what you guys would think about it and if you guys
would still stick around through the journey and you totally have and you guys have been nothing
but wonderful and i'm not surprised at all because i truly feel like i have like the coolest people
in the world who are subscribed to watch my videos and so thank you very much for being the coolest
and i will see you guys very soon in a new video also thank you to better help for sponsoring
today's video truly appreciated and i will see you guys very soon in a new video see you soon