- How could life in Bikini Bottom
possibly get any worse?
[Rumbling]
- Mount Bikini Bottom is erupting!
Boom!
- That's how.
- Cool.
[Explosions roaring]
- Look! The roof!
[Crowd screaming]
- Hey, you lemons,
Afraid of a little lava?
[Sizzling]
Cashie!
No!
Make it stop raining this fiery destruction!
[Sobbing]
- Sorry to interrupt your crying, Mr. Krabs,
but shouldn't we get to a place
that at least doesn't have a roof
with lava coming through it?
[Screaming]
Fear not.
Shelter can't be far away.
- Oh, why even bother, SpongeBob?
Can't you see?
Civilization as we know it is crumbling to dust.
Civic order is in tatters.
It's every man for himself.
There's no other way.
I'm gonna need your life essence!
[Growling]
- What are you boys doing out still?
Plenty of room at the volcano shelter.
Hey, but no more roughhousing.
You got that?
- Oh, yes, of course, ma'am.
Try and behave yourself, fellers.
- No need to get excited, citizens.
Your government is working tirelessly
to defeat this evil volcano.
- What are we gonna do?
- Don't worry.
We've got it under control.
- Under control?
Half the city's on fire.
You call that "under control"?
Huh? Do you?
Ah!
The end is near, Mayor!
- That guy's onto something.
What are you hiding from us, Mayor?
Do you have some secret?
Is the end near?
- Yeah! - Answer the question!
- Exactly! - Answer the question!
- Mr. Mayor!
Mr. Mayor, please, I've got something.
- Oh, yes, boy.
How do you propose we stop the volcano?
- Actually, I just had a question
about these parking tickets.
I don't have a car.
- Oh, boy, moron.
- We're doomed!
- [Chuckles]
You fools!
- Who are you?
- [Cackling]
All: Ooh!
- I am an ancient warrior from long ago,
the last of my kind who ruled over the ocean
from before the dawn of time.
But alas, my people were wiped out
by the same volcano that plagues you now.
- Then how did you survive?
- [Laughs]
I survived because I was the only one
who knew how to stop it.
- Well, don't keep us in suspense.
How did you stop it?
- You must make a sacrifice!
[Crowd gasping]
- What kind of sacrifice?
- A sacrifice must be made of the most miserable person.
- I knew it.
We have to sacrifice the most miserable person.
- And who would that be?
- Well, it certainly isn't me.
[All talking at once]
- Hey, Squidward,
who do you think is the most miserable person?
- Don't know. Don't care.
- But, Squidward, it's imperative that--
- But, Squidward, it is imperative that we nothing!
I think I'd rather take my chances with the volcano
than be stuck in this miserable barnacle hole
with you and the citizens of dum-dum town.
- Oh, oh, we're idiots now?
- I'm a very smart woman.
- Nice, nice.
- What?
[Crowd shouting]
You idiots!
You got the wrong guy!
- We heard you complaining about the fingerprints.
- And the foot tapping.
- And my loose change.
- And my teeth!
And his hat!
- And you called the pipe stupid.
- And the fact that you said
you were the most miserable person in Bikini Bottom.
- I'm the most miserable person in Bikini Bottom.
Oh, would you just... [Grumbles]
[Lava hissing]
Let me down, you goons!
- Sorry, Mr. Tentacles.
Throw him in, fellas.
- [Screams]
- Wait!
It is I who have made Squidward miserable.
Throw me in instead.
- Works for me.
- Well, I'm glad you all came to your senses.
Bunch of ingrates.
Come on, SpongeBob, jump in.
Whoa! - Squidward!
- SpongeBob, help!
- I'd love to, Squidward,
but you said do not help you ever again
and that being my neighbor
left you with nothing to be grateful for.
I made a promise.
- [Groaning]
I take it back!
[Screams]
[Babbles]
Please, SpongeBob.
I didn't mean any of that.
I do appreciate your friendship.
I am grateful.
I...I...
♪ I'm grateful for the life I'm living ♪
♪ Who knows how long I've have it? ♪
I learned that from you, remember?
Good-bye, everyone.
[Screams]
Boing!
Huh?
- Squidward,
I always knew you felt that way.
Aw, buddy.
Thanks for finally opening up to us.
[Pipe straining]
[Water roaring]
[High-pitched falling noise]
Crash!
[Crowd cheering]
- My house!
- Ah, now the volcano is appeased.
- But I thought you said a sacrifice had to be made
of the most miserable person.
- No. You didn't let me finish.
I was trying to say,
a sacrifice of the most miserable person's house.
No one ever listens to me.
[Chuckling]
[Cackling]