Tripp Kramer here from
www.trippadvice.com. I've been working with
the client because I'm taking coaching
clients. If you don't already know.
I'll put a link down in the description if
you're interested in doing some coaching.
And one of the things he's dealing with
is a girl that he's interested in.
However she's kind of interested at
times, not so much at others.
They do hook up once in a while. He wants
to be more of in a relationship with her,
she doesn't and so it's this constant
"what's going on?" And a lot of
her not showing as much interest.
So what happens when you're in this
situation? When the girl that you're with
is not showing interest? I want to be
very clear here. This is a situation in
which the girl already has interest in
you. If she doesn't have interest to you
from the beginning then she's not
interested. This is not about how to
get her interested in you. There's other
videos on my channel on this channel
about that. But what happens when she
does like you? You guys maybe kiss,
you've hook up, you've been on a date. There is
interest but then she starts to
pull away. What do you do? It's a
very simple and quick answer. You need to
do the same. You need to pull away also.
Here's what happens. When the girl is
starting to lose interest and the guy
sees that what he normally does is he
tries to attach more, which means he acts
very needy. This is a personality trait
that women are beyond turned off about.
They get very turned off when a guy
is trying to latch on. Especially if
she's already losing interest.
It seems very counterintuitive like "wait
a minute but if she is pulling away and
doesn't like me, if I pull away then
she's just gonna go". But that's not true.
What happens is you're showing her that
a, you don't care
and b, you're not needy. This is going to
hopefully, not in all cases, but hopefully
create her to miss you and her to be
like "Wait what's going on? He used
to be really into me.
Why isn't he into me anymore?" This idea
for some frickin wacky reason gets us
more interested in people. That's why
when the girl is pulling away from you, you
seem to be more interested in her.
This hard-to-get crazy game. There's something
about it. I think probably one of the
reasons is this idea of validation.
We seek a lot of validation from people.
Especially if you're not whole in yourself
and don't have high self-esteem.
If you're with a girl, she's giving you
validation, she's showing that she likes you
and then all of a sudden she goes away.
You don't have that validation anymore.
You're lacking that. You can't get it
from yourself. You feel like shit and
then you try to chase her even harder
which doesn't work.
Crazy psychological deep stuff happening
here. So what you have to do is you need
to pull away. This is gonna look like not
texting her as much if at all.
I wouldn't even disappear. I wouldn't ignore
her if she's trying to reach out to you,
but don't be so quick to text her back.
Don't set up more plans with her.
Create a life where you are actually busy.
Hopefully you already are. This means
you're busy with your career, busy with whatever
you're doing for your hobbies or any
other kind of work. Busy with other
friends. Maybe you guys are not even
fully committed yet. You should be dating
and meeting other girls. This is gonna
help you as well as help the situation
here where you can kind of let go a
little bit. This is the only way.
I'm telling you right now. This is the only
way. If you keep on trying to chase her
it's like two magnets where
they're on the same end and one as you
put it closer to the other one it just
goes away even faster. Same idea here.
She's going to just be running away from you.
Your best bet is just leave her alone.
Leave her alone. Don't text her as much.
Don't call her as much. DM, any kind of
communication just put to the side and
stay busy.
Again, I'm not saying ignore her because she's
gonna catch on to that and that's gonna
be weird. It's gotta be just more natural
like hey you doing some stuff, you're busy
going on with your life and then
eventually you can come back to her and
text her and see what's going on.
But take a couple days break. Take a
few days break from her. Try not to think
about her. Do not contact her and create
that distance to give it a chance to
miss you so then she needs to get that
validation back from you. Like "Whoa
where did Tripp go? Why isn't he
talking to me? What's going on?" Listen I
know that this sounds very game-like and
very kind of hard to get and here's the
thing, this is just how it goes.
This is how it goes. I wish that you as a person
could feel more self-love, feel more
self-esteem so you don't have this
addiction to validation from the girl you're
with and hopefully you're with a girl
that also doesn't need that.
Honestly you want to be with someone who
has as much self-esteem as you do assuming
that you have very high self-esteem so
these games don't have to be played.
The second girl is just like
"I'm not interested in you anymore"
and you're feeling that. You're like wait
this girls not interested in me?
But I'm awesome okay if you're not
interested in me anymore then goodbye.
See you later. That's what we want.
We want to get to to the place where
you're like I don't even need a girl or
desire a girl who doesn't have any
interest in me. Hopefully that's the
place to get to. Now I'm going to put a
video down below. It's about the two
phrases that a woman needs to hear to
feel wanted. This can also help in this
situation. Go check the description
below, find out what those two phrases
are. Just another YouTube video I have on
my channel. Use that with a girl. See
how it works for you and I'll see you in
the comments down below. Let's talk about
this. I'll see you on the next video.
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