Hey, this is Mat Boggs.
Have you ever noticed that there’s a pattern to the kind of guy you attract in your life?
You know, maybe you’re attracting the narcissist, the guy who only talks about himself.
Or maybe you’ve noticed that you attract emotionally unavailable men, men who only
want sex or just to fool around.
Or maybe you consistently attract guys you’re not really that into but they’re totally
into you.
Well, here’s the interesting thing: the results that we see in our life are always
a reflection of our internal state of being.
So, in other words, our circumstances, our bank account, the amount of money we have,
our love life, the types of men that you’re attracting, all that is always a perfect reflection
of your internal state of being – your mentality, your emotional state, and the actions that
you’re taking.
So if you want to change that pattern, there’s a way that you can do that.
I’m going to give you three simple but highly effective words that you can use to shift
the old pattern and create something new in your life.
Let’s go over to the office and I’ll share with you what those words are.
So, if we have patterns in our lives, then the question becomes, “Well, how do we change
that pattern?”
So you and I are both operating with a part of our brain called the RAS, the reticular
activating system.
And what’s interesting about the RAS is that the job of the RAS is to go out in our
life and seek evidence that supports our belief.
So, for example, if you believe that you’re about to get a new red Honda, then all of
a sudden, as you’re driving around, your RAS goes and operates and starts to identify
all the new red Hondas on the road.
This has probably happened to you where you’re about to buy a new car and you’re like,
“Oh my gosh, look at all these cars that are just like the car I’m going to get.
They must’ve discovered somehow that I was going to get this new car, they went all out
and got this new car.”
Right?
Well, the challenge is the RAS also makes us blind or asleep to things that are in opposition
to our major dominant belief.
So if you believe there are no good men out there, then you’re going to spot all the
no-good men and miss the good men who are right in front of you.
Case in point, I was on a coaching call with a woman and she was telling me, “I’m a
woman who never takes action and, to boot, I don’t know one honest, good guy in my
life.
Every guy I know is a liar and cheats and is a horrible guy.”
And I’m on the phone with her and I’m telling her, “Well, not every guy you know
is a horrible guy.”
And she was like, “Yes, they are.”
And I said, “Well, I am on the phone with you.
You know me.
What does that make me?”
And she was like, “Well, all right, well, there’s one exception.”
And the case in point here is that she was asleep to not only me as a great guy in her
life, but all the other great men in her life.
She wasn’t even aware of that.
So here’s the first step in changing the patterns of the results that you create in
your life and then I’m going to give you these three magic words.
The first step is to stop telling your story.
Because neurons that fire together wire together.
In other words, the more that you tell your story with your girlfriends about the horrible
date that you went on or how there are no good men out there or another guy was a total
narcissist, those men-bashing conversations that may feel good the moment you’re having
drinks with your girlfriend, having some wine and you’re going over this and rehashing
this may feel good in the moment, but it is deadly to the success of your future relationship
because you’re re-patterning.
You’re hardwiring those beliefs the more that you rehearse them emotionally and mentally.
The more that you tell those stories, the more you’re hard-coating those beliefs into
your mind.
Neurons that fire together wire together.
So my encouragement for you is to go on an old story fast.
Refuse to tell the old story.
Instead, tell the story of the life that you’re creating in your life, and here’s what I
mean.
The moment you’re about to tell an old story about how all the guys you meet are losers
or about how maybe it’s not in your soul pattern to have love or maybe you’re unlovable,
whatever that old story is, stop yourself and add these three magic words: Up until
now.
Up until now.
When you notice yourself start to tell that story, say, “You know, up until now, I haven’t
attracted men that I’m interested in.
But starting now, I am…” and then name the affirmation for your new life.
You might say, “Up until now, I’ve attracted unavailable men, but now I’m attracting
me who are open-hearted and want a committed relationship.”
You may say, “Up until now, I’ve believed that all the good ones are taken, but now
I’m believing more and more, every day, that it only takes one amazing man, and what
if meeting him were easy?”
You might say, “Up until now, I felt like maybe I was unlovable, but I know that I deserve
love and I’m attracting an incredible relationship in my life.”
When you begin interrupting the old story, the old thought pattern, and replacing it
with the words “up until now,” you’re signaling your subconscious mind that you’re
changing the direction of your life.
When you insert a powerful new belief, you’re signaling the captain of your ship that you’re
heading in a new direction.
And here’s the cool part: you literally begin to change and rewire your neurons.
You begin to change the neurological landscape of your mind such that your RAS now goes to
work on your behalf, attracting to you the positive results that are in alignment with
these new beliefs that you’re installing.
So this begins to change your story, it begins to change what you’re aware of, it begins
to change how you feel about yourself and what you attract into your life, and you will
attract an amazing man who loves you who you love and you guys can create an amazing relationship
together.
So my client, who was attracting these guys who were liars and cheaters and that she didn’t
like, began to shift her story.
She stopped telling that old story.
She started using the words “up until now,” started telling a new story, and through coaching
and few processes that I taught her, she began to shift the results she was attracting.
And sure enough, in a short period of time, she attracted a great man, a man who was in
alignment with the vision that she had created.
They fell in love, he’s totally into her, she’s totally into him, and they’re enjoying
a fulfilling, amazing relationship today.
So I would love to hear from you.
Post a comment below.
Share a story you are changing, right?
“Up until now, I’ve attracted…” and then whatever it’s been, “Unavailable
men.
But now I am…” and then share your declarative statement of what’s your new story going
to be?
Go ahead and post that in the comments section below.
I would love to read that comment.
What are you saying no to from your past and what are you attracting in your life today?
And if this video serves you, I invite you to share this with someone that you love and
care about.
And, as always, make sure that you subscribe to this channel because that way you're the
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And also, there’s a link to a resource in this video that will help you understand the
hearts and minds of men in a deeper, more profound way, so that you can create a better
connection with the men in your life.
So if that interests you, go ahead and click that link, you can get that resource.
Thanks so much for watching.
I’ll see you soon.