- Hey everyone, I'm Pear.
- And I'm Batman.
(laughing)
- Would you take that mask off?
- Okay but I should warn you,
I'm wearing more than one. (laughs)
- Ugh, anyway, as you fruit lovers at home
have probably figured out
today we're showing you How2 be Batman.
- Pear, you're saying it wrong it's
(deep voice) How2 be Batman.
- (deep voice) Okay, How2 be Batman.
- (deep voice) How2 be Batman.
Where's Rachel?
- Ah!
(laughing)
- Oh yeah, this is going to be a fun one.
- Can we start already?
- Not yet, not until I get the signal.
(signal flashing)
Okay. (laughing)
Step one, become a billionaire,
that way you can buy all kinds of cool bat toys
and have a secret lair and a butler and stuff.
- Yeah hold on, be a billionaire?
Dude, do you realize how hard it is to get that much money?
- I don't know what to tell you Pear, it makes sense to me.
(laugh)
Besides, we should be focusing more on the bat toys,
from flying Batwings to Batmobile, Batarangs.
When you're a billionaire all you gotta do
is put bat in front of a word
and it becomes a batastic item in your utility belt.
Seriously, any word at all.
- Yeah right.
- Ooo, that's a good one Pear, the Batwrite.
- [Pear] What?
- A pen that can be used to stab your enemies,
and it dispenses the appropriate amount of ink
in a reliable manner.
- Oh stop!
- Even better, the Batstop.
A stop sign painted black.
The bad guys can't see it, but you can, cause you're Batman.
(laughing)
(train horn) (crashing sound)
Ooo, he should have paid more attention
in driver's train-ing.
And that's no joke.
(laugh)
- Can we please move on?
Surely there's more to being Batman
than just being a billionaire.
- Oh for sure, step two is super important,
you have to disguise yourself.
See, there's no way you can tell who I really am.
- Yeah, pretty sure you're Orange,
the teeth are a dead giveaway,
not to mention the whole annoying aura.
- (laughs) Well of course you can tell who I am,
I'm not doing the voice yet.
(deep voice) The voice is part of the disguise.
- Dude, I think everyone can tell-
- (deep voice) Where's Rachel?
- Ughhh.
- (laughs) Oh wait, I forgot to laugh like Batman does.
(deep laughing)
- Okay, that was terrifying.
Dare I ask, is there a step three?
- You bet there is, yeah!
Step three, announce that you're Batman constantly.
- Are you serious?
- No! I'm not serious, I'm Batman!
(laugh) If you say it enough, it'll become true.
- Dude, you're crazy if you think
anyone's going to fall for that.
- Nuh-uh, I'm not crazy, I'm Batman. (laughs)
- Oh so annoying!
- I'm not annoying, (deep voice) I'm Batman.
(maniacal laughing)
- Ahhhhh!
- Wait I did the laugh wrong.
(deep maniacal laughing)
- [Pear] Would you stop it!
(super hero music)