I had my 60th birthday party this weekend.
So many people came.
I don't want to name drop but Portia de Rossi was there.
You can imagine when she walked in, I was like,
oh my god, you're here.
Who else?
You know.
Diddy was there.
And Puffy was there.
And Puff Daddy was there.
Love was there.
Don Julio was there.
Yep.
And I know some of you are thinking, wait a minute,
Ellen, your birthday was two weeks ago.
Let me correct you, my birthday started two weeks ago.
And then I had this party this weekend.
My birthday is like an entire season.
It's like Christmas and the flu.
And parties can get expensive.
You know that, right?
Especially when there's a lot of people.
So here's a money-saving tip for all of you: don't hire
a band, invite all your musician friends.
And it turns out they'll just perform for free, especially
when there's Don Julio involved.
So Pharrell performed with Meta.
Free.
And French Montana performed free.
Pink performed free.
Alessia Cara performed free.
Melissa Etheridge performed free.
I joined her for free.
Didn't charge anything.
Here's another tip, make sure you invite Reese Witherspoon.
Because now I see why she's such an amazing producer,
she's the one who, and I won't say forced,
but strongly suggested everyone should perform.
There she is giving the finger to somebody.
And Pink is there ready to perform.
And, later in the night, Tig Notaro, the hilarious Tig
Notaro, got up and she decided to perform
Adele's song "Hello."
Now, Tig cannot sing or play piano,
but that didn't stop her.
So I got up there and kicked her off the stage.
It was an epic night.
I was looking all around and I was
thinking how is this my life?
I mean all of my idols were in one room
and they were there for me, and the open bar.
And I had so much fun.
And then I came into work on Monday after my party
and I saw this headline.
And I was like, oops, I think I'm responsible for that.
I think that's my fault. I don't want to blame anyone
in particular, but I saw someone sitting at the bar
drinking all night long.
I'll just give her first name, Oprah.
And you can figure out which Oprah it was.
I am so thankful to everybody for coming.
And thank you, Portia, you put on the most amazing party
I have ever.
It's just a party I'll never forget.
And I think everyone who attended.
Some people took videos on their phones.
Everybody had their phones out.
This is an exclusive clip from my party.
[INTERPOSING VOICES]
But here is a tiny, tiny glimpse of something.
(SINGING) What about us?
What about all the broken happy ever after?
What about us?
What about all the plans that ended in disaster?
What about us?
What about trust?
And that guy was the only person in my birthday party
to land a triple axle.
Say hello to Twitch over there.
I would say that was a fun party, right?
Ellen it was so crazy.
And y'all, it was, it was nuts.
Nothing in life prepares you for those kind of events.
You know what I mean?
I couldn't have been prepared to bump into Oprah.
Oh, sorry, oh my god.
All there for love.
That just speaks volumes for you too, Ellen.
Everybody turned up, just the most eclectic group
of people, all sharing love, having fun, dancing
and having a good time.
And that was for you.
It was a lovely, lovely evening.
And it's so weird.
You just assume everybody knows, and I
know so many different types of people.
That's what's so great about it.
It was a really crazy mix of people.
And you assume everyone knows everyone.
And Adele, I was talking to Adele, and then she sees Pink
and she's like, oh introduce me to Pink.
And I'm like you don't know Pink?
And so I introduced Adele to Pink.
And then the Weeknd was like, is that Michael Keaton?
Would you introduce me to Michael Keaton?
And I'm like, sure.
So I just walked around introducing everybody
all night long.
But it was so much fun.
It was really, I mean it was a party that, like I said,
I'll never forget.
And Portia, she did the whole thing,
she put that entire thing together.
So I love you, thank you very much for doing that, Portia.
Hi, I'm Andy.
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