DOMINANCE HIERARCHY (Echoing)
Have you heard of the dominance hierarchy? A term coined by
Jordan Peterson? He's a man on the rise and he's got some really interesting takes I
think in perspectives on a lot of kind of hot topics in the media right now. You
can tell the guy does a lot of thinking for himself and it's not just
regurgitating "Yahoo articles," like most people do but his belief and he talks
about this a little bit in his book 212 principles which I also read a couple
weeks ago that men are hard-wired to look and tell where they fall in the
dominance hierarchy which just basically means how do you stack up in terms of
dominance versus everyone else out there and he talks about how we naturally in
our heads know where we rank and then we just kind of know our role and we just
kind of accept it and looking around this seems somewhat true to me it does
seem very true but the thing I don't like about it is in his books and in his
lectures he talks about this and he talks about how in different creature--
I think it's lobsters or crabs it's the same way but he doesn't give any
practical tips on how to grow or how to rise in the dominance hierarchy it's
almost like he thinks that the way that you're born or once you get to a certain
point you're done kind of changing and developing that you are where you are
you're kind of stuck almost like a caste system which is not the case at all so
in this video I want to give two quick ways that you can immediately rise in
the dominance hierarchy the way I like to explain it is that in any social
interaction there's an interaction equilibrium and that's where each person
sees themselves in terms of social value versus the other person so for instance
after a rock concert the the the lead singer is talking to a fan backstage how
do you think that interaction equilibrium looks or dominance hierarchy
however you want explain it well like this right the person has way higher
social value and the person down here and they're gonna act like it right
what's the fan gonna do gonna be screaming oh my gosh I can't believe I
get to beat you oh my gosh and what's the rock star gonna be doing yeah cool
good to meet you awesome glad you came appreciate it right in all their
communication they've accepted those roles now that's an extreme example it's
hard to find an example more crazy than that but what about like in the
workplace where there's just some guy there who always kind of talks down to
you and acts like he's little higher than you clearly he thinks he's higher
than you and the dominance hierarchy what can you do I'm gonna teach you
there's so many different things you can do but in this video I'm gonna teach you
two and the first one that's so easy and so powerful just tweak your vocal
tonality so when you're talking to someone like that go from a rapport
neutral or you see yourself as having a rapport neutral tone which just means to
kind of quickly explain them rapport neutral is how you talk to your friends
or appear just the way you normally talk rapport seeking or supplicate if those
are the same tone that's like a fan to the rock star oh my gosh I can't believe
you're here how is your weekend are you we're poor breaking the best example I
can think of as a police officer talk license and registration
right not trying to impress anybody they have the authority they're bossing
around you how fast you were going okay all I want you to do in this instance is
go from a rapport neutral to a bit of a rapport breaking tone okay so if you're
talking to them maybe you're just at the coffee shop and it's Monday or you're
the coffee area and you're here corporation should probably go to the
coffee shop some guy who talks down to you but you go up there and you're
talking about your weekend and say this guy's name is Bill and he always talks
down to you a little bit well when you're talking about your weekend go
from yeah we went out we were on the motorcycles - yeah we went out we're on
the motorcycles it was a beautiful day we went out there how about you how was
your weekend you changed that tonality a little bit and all of a sudden
subconscious in their head likewise barren talking like that he sounds much
more confident he sounds much more high-value in high-status he's likely
not thinking through these things logically but his subconscious is
telling him that and now when you continue to do this every time you speak
to him you've taken it a touchdown to rapport a little bit rapport breaking or
what you think is rapport breaking a lot of people don't understand the way they
actually sound when they speak it they think they're in a rapport neutral voice
they're actually too supplicating tone but you take it down one step
immediately you're gonna rise in the dominance hierarchy and rise in the
interaction equilibrium and displayed you're basically saying hey bud you
don't have any higher status than me you don't have any higher value than me and
I'm gonna communicate that through the way that I talk it's gonna be tough a
lot of times when people first try to use a bit more of a true rapport neutral
report breaking tone they find it tough like oh do I sound like a jerk I sound
like this no you sound like you are on the same level as this person you're
just used to talking in this other way because the other person's higher than
you on the dominance hierarchy now the power of your voice is so impacting on
every single level of your social status and your social value and that's all I
want to talk about for that one in this video but if you're looking to improve
the power of your voice so when you talk people stop and they want to listen it
commands attention and respect I suggest you go to vocal power boot camp comm you
can touch or click up here as well I've got a video there that's gonna walk you
through more how you can improve your voice regardless what kind of voice that
you're born with now the second thing you can do is a body language technique
so in this instance all you're gonna do is orient your body thirty five to forty
four thirty to forty five-degree thirty two point five to seventy nine degrees
thirty to forty five degrees away from the person so let's say once again
you're talking to Bill in the shop and he's being you know just a little bit
like aloof and he's talking limit down to you all you gonna do just turn a
little bit away and now you're talking to him but you're just kind of like this
what does that communicate you could probably picture in your mind what that
communicates right now not that interested in what you have to say when
you're talking to somebody like the boss you're squared up immediately yes sir
how do you do how was your day and all of a sudden you're yeah yeah we
went out it was it was a nice day we actually finally got to catch up on that
barbecue place that I'm not sure if I told you about we were looking at it a
really good time how is that different then yeah we finally got to eat that
barbecue place we're looking at has a really good time totally different feel
and it communicates that you're higher on the dominance hierarchy those are two
very easy ways to immediately boost your level on that now what do you do when
someone actually tries to make fun of you what if you're in a situation where
you're trying to look really good it's important to you
and someone's trying to make fun of you what do you do how do you handle it I
was out on a first date two days ago in Dallas Texas and there were three guys
sitting to my right that tried to make fun of me if you want I'll tell you the
full story right here and break down exactly how I handled it so you know how
to handle if it happens to you if you haven't checked out that video and the
Volkl power boot camp calm you can touch right here to go check it out there I'll
talk to you soon no said not heard of something good