Hi, I'm Gabby from gonaturalenglish.com where you can learn to speak English fluently and with cultural confidence
Today we're talking about three greetings that native English speakers. Do not use but maybe they should
so these are
Greetings, we're talking more about the cultural side of the greetings rather than just learning the vocabulary of greetings
So this is about your cultural
Competency and about what I have learned from working and living all over the world
Well at least in a few different places
So I got this idea to talk about different greetings that native English speakers
Don't use when I heard a story of a Brazilian man where I'm living right now is Brazil who?
Went to the United States to work. He was fluent in English
His English was really good you guys and he had a huge cultural problem
So he learned English in the traditional way and a lot of traditional English classrooms. Don't teach the cultural part
So that's why we're talking about this today. So he went to the US and where I'm from so I'm talking about
United States North American culture here
I say native English speakers because I think we have a lot in common throughout the english-speaking world
but if you want to correct me if you want to say in the comments whether you know
You're from a different english-speaking country. And you do use these greetings. Awesome. Let me know
Anyway, this Brazilian man, let's call him Marcos de Silva cuz that's a nice Brazilian name. Just making it up
so Marcos went to the United States and he was
Working for about a month and then he got called into Human Resources, and they said Marcos we have to talk to you
It's serious. We have a lot of your co-workers
Complaining about your sexual harassment and he was like, what are you talking about?
This is a family guy a really
professional guy
And he didn't think that he was sexually harassing anyone but Human Resources said Markos
You're hugging everyone you're touching them inappropriately
And he was like what?
because in Brazil in professional
environments it is totally appropriate to
Hug people to greet them
so in the United States
It is not and a lot of his American co-workers felt like he was touching them too much. He was getting too close
Physically in North America we have this like, I don't know about three feet one meter
Of personal space we like to respect and so hugs
definitely kisses are not
Greetings that we do in the US and a handshake is always a safe bet
for men and women so I've been in different cultures where men and women don't even touch you don't even
Shake a man's hand if you're a woman or vice versa
That's a little weird for me because in the u.s. We
Shake everyone's hand in
Brazil and in Latin America, I really
Enjoy hugging people to greet them or giving them a little kiss on the cheek
I think it's really warm and nice, but you just have to know that in the United States people can be a little standoffish
We might seem a little cold if you're coming from a culture where everyone hugs and kisses each other
But that's just the way it is
so be careful and be smart and
Just don't touch people very much in the United States. Unless they say yes, it's okay. Like you can ask is it?
Okay, if I give you a hug and if they're like uh-uh
Probably the answer is no. Okay. So stay on the safe side don't get sued for sexual harassment. Okay
number two number one was hugging and kissing number two is
We do not
Greet everyone in a room when we arrive
We also do not say goodbye to everyone in a room when we leave
So this also might seem a little cold or a little
Self-centred - just arrived without saying hello and leave without saying goodbye
Again, it's just the way it is. It might seem strange depending on where you're from
but when I went to live in the Dominican Republic
Many many years ago. This is the first time that I realized that
it's
Common, and actually really nice to say hello to everyone in a room when you arrive
office or at a party or
wherever it may be also when you leave but
Thankfully for my American
Cultural norms. I've been able to leave
Parties and situations that I'm not comfortable in in a hurry because I didn't feel it was necessary to say goodbye to everyone
So sometimes it can take a long time to say hello and to say goodbye. I think that we when we arrive at the office
we
Can say good morning we can say hello, but it's not necessary
I'm the kind of person who always likes to say hello to everyone in the room and say good morning
And I just love to connect with people as soon as possible
And I think a lot of that comes from living in the Dominican Republic living in Brazil living abroad in many
Cultures that really take the time to connect with each person in their own
But you should know if you go to the United States
It is not very common to greet everyone in the room when you arrive at the office
And it's also not common to say goodbye to everyone in the room number three
Okay, this comes from my years living and working in Japan. There's two really cool
phrases or
cultural
Actions behaviors, that's the word. I'm trying to say that a Japanese people do in the office
so when they arrive if you arrive later than your co-workers you would say, osaki me should sedation Oz and
That means I'm sorry for arriving later than you. How nice is that?
So I think it's pretty cool that people say that to respect each other and to say hello
But we don't have anything like this in the US. So in the u.s. You would just we arrive at work
Maybe say hello if you make eye contact with people
But the people that you don't make eye contact with you don't need to say hello, and you don't need to say I'm sorry
I arrived later than you just if you arrive late just try to be there earlier
The next day being on time is super important. I'll say that or even early for work
So also another phrase from Japan that I really liked was
It's got a sama
which means thank you for your hard work and often at
The end of a work day or even during a work day people would say, oh, it's kaio-sama
Which is thank you for your hard work
acknowledging and respecting someone's dedication to their work is really a lovely thing and we don't really have anything like this in
North American culture we might say thank you we say thank you very often actually
We don't have any phrase that is thank you for your hard work that we use often
And so I really like this phrase because it's a way that you can connect with your co-workers start a conversation or end a conversation
and
Yeah, and it's nice but as a native English speaker, I can't think of anything that we have like this
So if you want to thank your co-workers just simply say thank you. I appreciate
everything that you're doing and you're so helpful and
You kind of have to like just talk a lot and and use a lot of different words and phrases to express your thanks
Whereas in Japanese we have this nice little common phrase that's used all the time. So there we have it three
Greetings or goodbyes or phrases that we use in other cultures, but not in North American culture
So the first one is actually not even a phrase. It's just the way that we greet people
We don't use a hug and a kiss
We would simply shake hands if it's the first time you're meeting someone but if you're in an office environment
You don't need to shake everyone's hand every day
We just shake hands the first time we meet someone or if we're doing a business deal
We shake hands when we conclude the business deal
Otherwise, we don't need to shake and that's actually another cultural difference that I forgot to mention that
we don't shake hands as much I've worked with students from
many different countries and I noticed that a lot of my
students from the Middle East
also
From some parts of Europe would shake my hand every single time that we met
Even though we'd known each other for a long time and I thought okay, this is nice
But it's not normal in North American culture to shake someone's hand every single time
You see them just the first time you meet them
And then if you're concluding a business deal like you, you know sold your house or something
You could shake someone's hand when you sell the house. So
No hand shaking besides the first time and the last time you see someone no hugging no kissing
Sorry about that. Just hello
Good morning
And then we also don't need to say hello or goodbye to everyone in the room
Just people who you're working closely with people who you make eye contact with. Otherwise, you don't really need to
Announce your arrival or announce your departure and if you want to say thank you for someone's
Great work with you simply say thank you. It's really a pleasure to work with you. I appreciate
Everything that you are doing. Thank you for everything. Just use other words like that when it's appropriate
You don't need to say this every single day. If you do say this every single day, it could come off as actually
insincere
Because we don't usually thank someone every single day for their work like I experienced in Japan, which is really nice. So I
Missed some of these things when I work in the u.s
I definitely missed some of these things that I've experienced working and living abroad
but I just wanted to share them with you so that you know if and when you go to
live study or work in the United States that there's nothing wrong with you if people aren't
hugging you or kissing you or
Greeting you or saying goodbye to you or thanking you for the for your work?
Nothing wrong with you
just
observe how
People are acting in an environment and try to follow that because I will say
Every work environment is different and the greetings or the behaviors that you practice in a work environment
highly depend on the cultural environment of
That business I will say it again. Every business is a little different if you work at a huge corporation
The feeling would be even more
Formal and professional than if you're working at a small
Startup which could be super informal and people might hug and give high-fives and say hey, what's up, man? Good morning
And it could be a more relaxed atmosphere. So take my advice here with a grain of salt and be sure to
observe your environment to
See what makes sense for where you are working or living or studying
All right. Let me know your thoughts about these different greetings that we don't do. Do you think Americans should do them?
Let me know in the comments. I can't wait to hear from you
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