>> Jon: WELCOME BACK.
LAST WEEK, WE DID-- LAST WEEK, I THOUGHT A VERY NICE PIECE ON THE
SHOW ABOUT HOW FOX NEWS WANTED PEOPLE TO APOLOGIZE FOR RUSHING
TO JUDGMENT ON THE FERGUSON SHOOTING OF MICHAEL BROWN.
AND SO WE I THINK QUITE CLEVERLY DREW AN ANALOGY TO THAT
AND THEIR RUSH TO JUDGMENT ON BENGHAZI, IT WAS REALLY QUITE
DROLL.
NOW WHILE FOX NEVER ADDRESSED OUR BENGHAZI POINT,
IT APPEARS NOW THEY'RE ASKING FOR MORE THAN AN APOLOGY.
>> PETE WILLIAMS, TO HIS CREDIT, GOT THAT BOSTON MARATHON TERROR
REPORTING DEAD ON.
AND THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA HAILED HIM AS A HERO FOR GETTING IT
RIGHT, WHICH HE DID.
FOX NEWS GOT THIS CASE RIGHT.
FOX NEWS, NOT JUST ME.
SEAN HANNITY HAD A LOT OF SEGMENTS, PLUS O'REILLY HAD A
LOT OF SEGMENTS, URGING CAUTION.
WOULD THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA EVER HAIL THEM AS HEROES LIKE WE
HEARD ABOUT PETE WILLIAMS?
>> Jon: YEAH, WHY DOESN'T FOX GET AS MUCH CREDIT AS-- WHO'S
PETE WILLIAMS?
( LAUGHTER ) ANYWAY, THE POINT IS, IT WASN'T
THE FIRST TIME THEY GOT IT RIGHT.
>> I URGED CAUTION IN THE DUKE COVERAGE, AND IN THE TRAYVON
MARTIN COVERAGE, AND NOW THIS COVERAGE.
>> Jon: THAT'S THREE TIMES.
THEY GOT IT RIGHT THREE TIMES IN 10 YEARS.
THOSE ARE SOLAR ECLIPSE NUMBERS, PEOPLE, WHICH I THINK IS WHY
IT'S RECOMMENDED YOU ONLY WATCH FOX THROUGH A TINY PINHOLE POKED
IN A PIECE OF CARDBOARD.
YOU CAN'T LOOK DIRECTLY AT FOX.
IT WILL INDELIBLY BURN YOUR SOUL.
WHILE OF COURSE THE WHOLE RUSH TO JUDGMENT COMPLAINT IS
( BLEEP ), FOX IS NOTHING BUT A RUSH TO JUDGMENT IN
ALMOST EVERY SITUATION.
OKAY.
YOU'RE THE CAUTION AND SOBER REFLECTION NETWORK.
( LAUGHTER ) BUT MY FAVORITE PART OF THE
PIECE WAS AFTER 10 MINUTES OF COMPLAINING THAT NO ONE WOULD
EVER THANK THEM, THIS.
>> IF YOU ARE WAITING FOR THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA TO SAY NOT ONLY
THAT WE WERE WRONG IN THIS RACIALLY CHARGED CASE THAT
RESULTED IN SO MUCH VIOLENCE IN THAT TOWN AND TO CREDIT
FOX NEWS FOR BEING RIGHT, YOU'RE GOING TO HOLD YOUR
BREATH A LONG TIME.
>> WE DON'T CARE ABOUT THEM.
(LAUGHTER) >> Jon: RIGHT, YOU DON'T
CARE, IN THE SAME WAY MY MOM DOESN'T CARE IF I EVER CALL.
( LAUGHTER ) SURE, CALL OR NOT.
I COULD JUST SIT HERE AND DIE. ( LAUGHTER )
BUT THE POINT IS, THE POINT IS YOU WERE RIGHT,
AND THAT IS NEWSWORTHY WHEN FOX IS RIGHT.
AND CAUSE FOR CELEBRATION.
SO TO HONOR THAT TIME YOU WERE RIGHT, WE GOT YOU A FUDGIE THE
WHALE.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) BECAUSE, YOU KNOW WHY, WE THINK
YOU'RE A WHALE OF A NETWORK!
IN THAT WE'VE BEEN CHASING YOU OUR WHOLE LIVES AND JUST CAN'T
KILL YOU.
BUT THAT'S NOT ALL, FOX.
IN HONOR OF THIS SINGULAR ACHIEVEMENT OF YOU BEING RIGHT,
LIBERAL HOLLYWOOD HAS SOMETHING THEY'D LIKE TO SAY TO YOU.
HOLLYWOOD.
>> I'M GEORGE LUCUS AND I'M HERE TO ASSURE YOU THAT I AM ONLY
GOING TO MAKE MOVIES FROM NOW ON THAT ARE BLINDLY
UNCRITICAL OF AMERICA.
LIKE "THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK, JUSTIFIABLY".
"AMERICAN EXCEPTIONALISM GRAFFITI."
"STAR WARS, THE REAGAN MISSILE DEFENSE VERSION."
AND "THE CLINTON MENACE."
FOX NEWS, MAY YOU LIVE LONG AND PROSPER.
WAIT, I DIDN'T WRITE THAT, DID I?
>> Jon: SORRY. BUT THE TRUTH IS THIS--
( APPLAUSE ) FOX, WE CAN SEND YOU ALL THE
CONGRATULATORY MESSAGES AND PRAISE WE CAN MUSTER, BUT IT'S
REALLY JUST GOING TO PALE IN COMPARISON TO HOW YOUR BIGGEST
FANS FEEL ABOUT YOU, AND SO WE HAD THEM TAPE SOME
MESSAGES OF CONGRATULATIONS AS WELL. TAKE A LOOK.
>> ONE NETWORK HAS TRANSFORMED, REENVISIONED AND REINVENTED THE
WAY NEWS IS DONE.
>> FOX IS THE DOMINANT FORCE IN BROADCAST NEWS TODAY.
>> WE'RE THE ONLY NETWORK THAT'S TELLING THE TRUTH RIGHT NOW.
>> IT'S THE ONLY PLACE YOU CAN FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOUR COUNTRY.
>> YOU MIGHT LEARN SOMETHING AS OPPOSED TO JUST HAVING YOUR
WORLD VIEW REINFORCED.
>> WE GIVE YOU BOTH SIDES.
WE GIVE YOU ALL THE STUFF.
>> WE'RE SIMPLY BETTER THAN THE OPPOSITION.
>> WE KEEP KICKING THEIR ASS EVERY DAY IN THE RATINGS.
>> NUMBER ONE. >> NUMBER ONE.
>> NUMBER ONE, THAT'S US.
>> PROBABLY THE MOST POWERFUL NEWS AGENCY IN THE WORLD RIGHT
NOW.
>> WE'RE CERTAINLY COVERING IT THIS MORNING.
THANK YOU, FOX NEWS.
>> YOU GUY'S, YOU'RE THE BEST.
>> THANK GOD FOR OUTLETS LIKE FOX NEWS.
>> THANK GOD FOR FOX NEWS.
>> THANK GOD FOX NEWS IS ON IT.
>> THANK GOD.
>> GOD BLESS FOX NEWS.
>> Jon: HE CLEARLY ALREADY HAS.
THE GREAT THING IS I GET IT NOW.
YOUR NETWORK LAUNCHED IN 1996, YOU'RE 18 YEARS OLD, AND JUST
LIKE EVERY OTHER 18-YEAR-OLD, YOU HAVE A MASSIVE EGO AND SPEND
24 HOURS A DAY JERKING YOURSELF OFF.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.