growing up is full of changes but some
things never stop welcome to
watchmojo.com this Netflix animated
series coach Steve I'm actually North
Carolina gas station attendant coach
Steve man number ten featuring ludacris
speaks he's grumpy because he has a rare
medical condition that makes him aware
of his own existence Jays family is
notoriously awful to him but at least he
is a faithful dog in his corner given
his intimidating size and name featuring
Ludacris may be fearsome but this dog is
all bark and no bite actually he doesn't
just bark this pitbull can talk to me
whenever he pops up featuring ludacris
is usually restricted to a liner too yet
his one-liners are always surreally
hysterical and kind of sad I'll never be
thin whereas most dogs haven't a care in
the world featuring ludacris is aware of
his existence meaning he can feel
insecure about his weight and afraid
that he'll never find happiness anywhere
I'm afraid that if I can't be happy here
then perhaps I'm the problem what makes
this all the more hilarious / tragic is
that seemingly nobody understands him
unless they're on a drug trip you're
chased pitbull featuring ludacris and
you can talk you don't look so good
number 9 Mirror Missy oh no it's my
angry psycho clone mirror Missy I'm a
Bambi with a big itch and I'm gonna
scratch your eyes out and finger fudge
hello oh she's unpleasant as crude as
big-mouthed can get it does reflect the
insecurities that young teens face both
literally and figuratively
although Missy's usually a ball of
positivity mirror Missy looms over her
like a shameful shadow jeez Louise your
chest is concave it's like a spoon my
mom says I'm going to develop in my own
time ah you fell for that holy Missy's
reflection serves as a physical
personification of her self-hatred
seeing horrible things whenever a mirror
is present basically she's like a
comment section full of trolls you
an understaffed Scarecrow in those
babyGap overalls
Missy does summon the confidence to tell
off her reflection thanks to an
enlightening trip to a spa mirror Missy
resurfaces in season 3 but instead of
going after her counterparts body image
she motivates Missy to stand up for
herself whether she's being hateful or
helpful we can all identify with that
person looking back at us in the mirror
eight coach Steve's awful life Steve do
you ever get lonely of course not I
remain lonely coach Steve is rarely seen
without an optimistic smile on his face
which is ironic since he lived a pretty
sucky life well his childhood is a bit
mysterious we know that his mother had
an affair with a man named Gary who took
his own life while Steve was locked in
the car this man baby has little
understanding of human reproduction or
making thick in the warm as he puts it I
can't believe it I actually made thick
in the war he struggles to have a
meaningful adult relationship instead
spending most of his time around kids
that's not creepy at all oh and he lives
on a diaper barge this is incredible so
obviously you know I was no idea well
you're fine people who came to the
diaper barge and jumped on me this is
the best day of my life baby we'd say
that we pity coach Steve but he's
clearly too stupid to comprehend how
horrible he has it maybe ignorance is
bliss that's it it's just that simple
even if it's not I can't offer you more
number seven Andrew if you've ever
wondered why Andrew has such low
self-esteem look no further than his
overbearing father Andrew careful with
my precious store
Marty globerman never misses an
opportunity to criticize his son
starting off most of his sentences
screaming Andrew as a matter of fact
Marty decided to name his son Andrew
because it sounded right when he shouted
well what are we gonna name him how
about Andrew Andrew Andrew Andrew eggs
row Marty blames Andrew for everything
including stuff he has no control over
like when Ashton Kutcher replaced
Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men
oh please you love could you walk me
through how I did that Hendra nearly
cracks after his father forces him to
wax his mustache but even then Marty
learns nothing about his harsh parenting
get in the paint you got a huge body
while Marty does love his family deep
down he show more affection towards a
plate of scallops than his own son you
know me so well hey why don't you meet
us at the dumpster after cocktail hour I
won't regret it number six
Svetlana plus Dmitri forever chances are
you overlooked one of the show's best
running gags in the second episode jesse
accurately deduces that a female hating
janitor intentionally neglected to stock
the girls bathroom with toilet paper we
then cut to Demetri the janitor throwing
toilet paper into the water cursing out
his love Svetlana and her gender gender
rewinding you'll notice the words
Svetlana Plus Dmitri forever etched out
on the bathroom stall this isn't the
last we see of the couple as Dimitri and
Svetlana can be spotted having a bitter
date later that season Andrew also
encounters Svetlana in the porn scape
which may explain why Dmitri was so
angry with her are we the only ones who
want to see their full love slash
breakup story number five nathan fillion
fantasies
you are so beautiful Missy may i kiss
you with my mouth of course nathan
fillion whether it's based on his work
on castle or firefly you may be
surprised to learn how many women have a
celebrity crush on cult actor Nathan
Fillion Missy is so enamored with
villian but she has a poster of him in
her bedroom she regularly casts him in
her vaginal auntie's fantasies which is
the next best thing to seeing captain
mal Reynolds back in action your non
confrontational nature is one of the
things I find most attractive about you
okay nathan is also the central
character in her Rock of Gibralter fan
fiction buying saffron at a
seventh-century spice market but Nathan
couldn't get that muscular force out of
his mind and yes
that's the actual Nathan Fillion voicing
himself which only makes Missy's
fantasies funnier they can steal your
human form old friend but they could
never steal your wit number four J's
dad's law commercials love dies let's
bury the body together stop quoting your
dad's
commercials J maybe his own hormone
monster but his father doesn't even know
the meaning of the word discreet even
before we meet mr. Bilzerian we're given
a pretty good idea of what he's like
that's because J frequently quotes his
dad's viral law commercials much to the
frustration and disgust of everyone else
you guys realize DNA is a hoax created
by gay scientists right stop quoting
your dad's law commercials oh yeah to
say that these commercial sounds
shocking and demeaning towards women
would be an understatement when we
finally do see one of mr. bilzerian's
divorce ads it's somehow manages to be
even more over the top than we initially
imagined I'm guy Bilzerian attorney at
law and family man but I will happily
abandon my family to get you the divorce
settlement you deserve
the clients Jai's dad represents are
every bit as sketchy ranging from a
blood smuggler to a child liquor
distributor and remember love dies great
now we're quoting as law commercials
call me today because marriage is a sham
and love dies let's bury the body
together number three
Jay and his pillows oh well that's a
pillow no no no no no she's so much more
than a pillow during a sleepover Jay
gives an explicit description of how he
gets intimate with his pillow in a
subsequent episode it's revealed that
the pillow talks and she's voiced by
Princess Anna herself Kristen Bell I
guess we'll always have that time in
your mud room on your pitbull featuring
ludacris licked your toes right as we
climax together making matters weirder
the pillow is 40 years old if you think
that's bizarre
the pillow whose name is Pam gets
pregnant I don't know how to say this
but I'm late late your pillow you have
nowhere to do no Jay I'm pregnant what
turns out the father isn't Jay but his
brother Kurt he kind of looks like my
brother from there Jay seeks comfort in
a series of rebounds including his bath
mat a motel pillow named Suzette and a
couch cushion named Brad the latter of
whom leaves him questioning his
sexuality let's just assume if there's a
piece of furniture in the house Jay has
stuffed some bags of soup in it yeah Jay
you're so good at the before sex
yeah for girls and guys bro yeah number
two
coach Steve's jobs how he long story
Martin short they fired me from the
school and now I'm Walgreens greeted
coach Dave we're surprised it took two
whole seasons for somebody as
incompetent as coach Steve to lose his
job Steve you are fired yeah fired up
over the course of season three
the former PE teacher goes through a
revolving door of new jobs none of which
he's qualified for what are you doing
here oh I'm coach part-time caterers
Steve now yeah they give me a new job
every episode he's first seen as a
Walgreens greeting clerk where he falls
in love with Valentine's merchandise
from there
Steve lands brief gigs as a store
mannequin a caterer and a lyft driver
I'm coach lyft driver cautionary tale
the Knicks Steve now coach Steve finally
scores a win when he's welcomed back as
a gym teacher even though he could have
accepted another job at the school for a
lot more money how would you like Liza's
job it's a lot more money this is for
you my tiny dudes no I want to be in
charge to the big squeaky room even if
coaching doesn't work out for him in the
long run he can always fall back on his
DJ career coming at you live from
dodgeball before we continue
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you go into your settings and switch on
notifications number one the ponytail
killer the ponytail killer strikes again
damn it hold on he's dead what we're
calling him because I thought we were
going with the ponytail proudly white
Prowler he's not a cat burglar I like
alliteration in the season 1 finale
Jessi nearly meets her demise at the
hands of the ponytail killer this
mystery character naturally targets
victims with ponytails which she keeps
as trophies
in one episode we see things from the
killer's perspective as he drives a car
with a ponytail hanging from his
rearview mirror pretty ponytail as of
season 3 we still don't know the
ponytail killer's identity or his
motivation are you the ponytail killer
while coach Steve has apparently been
ruled out there are plenty of other
potential suspects our money is on one
of Jays family members or at least
somebody who lives in guy town we just
hope we get an answer somewhere down the
line do you agree with our picks check
out this other recent clip from
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