now there is not much about this armor
that i can say that has not already been
said but we're going to try and be fair
we're going to try and look at this
functionally and aesthetically and
characterily
we're going to try i received way too
many excellent armor suggestions woe is
me what a terrible problem to have we're
just gonna have to make it a series
let's start with the witcher mostly the
series but there are a couple of game
designs in there too if you are a patron
or a youtube channel member yes that's
new i have figured out the thing you
should head over there now because the
digressions about cowboy boots and jack
chain and my tv watching habits are
mostly interspersed into the video
rather than being all at the end so you
don't want to miss those but if you're
just here for the armor let's get to it
i like to name at least some of my tiers
thematically so the top one is called
tulsicoin to your designer this one we
reserve for armor which is both
functionally and aesthetically pleasing
second tier this time around is going to
be called respect doesn't make history
which is to say the design is solid but
not amazing maybe there's some details
that are a bit off but generally it's
not bad middle tier is as always not
actually armor where we put the stuff
which i have been specifically asked to
talk about but which is not actually
armor so it wouldn't really be fair to
rank it like that moving on down we've
got sid in the corner and brewed for
things which could be worse but just
aren't great really and lastly according
to tradition we have
just stabbed me now so where to start
but with the man himself geralt season
one i like pretty well the main armor
looks kind of like brigandine it looks
reasonable mobility-wise there's an
actual waist belt no helmet but how
often am i really rewarded with a helmet
under these circumstances i suppose that
monster hunting does require excellent
peripheral vision and also good hearing
so
still would like a little steel cap have
killed you no no it wouldn't there is a
lot of coverage on the top half which
contrasts
pretty sharply with game siri who we'll
get to in a minute because she was an
actual patron request i also note what i
think are leather trousers which seem to
be popular with witchers i guess they
are wipe clean and they're more
protective than cloth and another
witcher style in this series at least is
the lack of hip and groin coverage they
do ride horses a lot i suppose and they
also do need serious leg mobility
overall given the fact that henry cavill
reportedly find it a bit uncomfortable
and the fact that it's just a bit
dull we'll go for respect doesn't make
history it's not the best but i've seen
much worse season two geralt apparently
had design input from henry cavill to
make it more comfortable which i'm all
for that said i know laurica musculata
was an historical thing but i'm not
generally a fan especially in black it
kind of reminds me of batman
but not necessarily in a good way but i
do like the shoulder design and i do
like that we seem to have kept the van
braces from season one and overall i
would rank this one in respect doesn't
make history as well because it's not
bad
i just don't love it now to lead us on
to our patreon request which was siri in
witcher 3 specifically let me present
geralt in an equivalent kind of costume
i.e geralt in a shirt
no i feel like that's more
zero suit geralt can we get some
trousers
better so siri's look is basically this
and is therefore obviously a not
actually armor but interesting
nonetheless and b looks just like
geralt's starting shirt but with a
couple of extras on the positive side
hair is sensibly tied back so it's not
going to get in her face all the time i
always appreciate gloves because like as
a witcher you never know what sort of
things you're going to have to touch and
if they're corrosive or just disgusting
better to ruin the gloves than your
hands is what i'm saying here no pockets
but she does have travel bags which you
know are useful for putting stuff in and
the leather trousers are going to be
very cleanable as long as you can move
in them i'm not super convinced by the
leather underbust corset stylistically i
see where you're going but practically
not so much underbust corset means
practically no bust support and so i
assume that she's wearing some kind of
bra but how supportive that is who even
knows and while the corset is long
enough to give some groin protection it
is also going to limit mobility because
it extends up way past her waist so if
it were me designing it i would probably
have two pieces like a leather over bust
corset for boob support and then a
little sort of skirt thing if required
or just a kind of like one piece leather
vest which goes over the top and kind of
holds everything in actually the outfit
they gave her in the series is pretty
much exactly how i would have redesigned
this including nice sensible boots
without a huge stonking great heel there
is
no need for a heel that high on her
boots there just isn't i mean it looks
like a cowboy boot heel but those are
pretty specialized just
no siri does not go around roping calves
or breaking wild horses stop it overall
this not actually armor but i feel like
the series redesign is enough of an
improvement that you should toss a coin
to your designer regardless storage
capacity notwithstanding but maybe
they'll give her a bag oh and this this
this this is just no no look you can see
the scar on series midriff why would you
not cover the entire torso with mail if
you had male which you apparently do i
mean one pauldron sure sleeveless male i
guess okay if you're really trying to
save weight but there is a limited point
in wearing mail if half of your vital
organs remain uncovered and there's a
big gap over your heart also the long
embroidered thing as seen here on the
doll is just a bit too long for someone
who does a lot of running and jumping
and climbing of trees i like the
embroidery but you know this would have
been perfectly fine i mean aesthetically
speaking nice colors and patterns
practically speaking just stab me now
because i fear that monsters will be so
rude as to attack your uncovered head
neck heart liver kidneys spleen stomach
and not your nicely armored boobs sorry
anyway speaking of series redesigns
which we were just a moment ago i fear
that while series was a distinct
improvement and geralt says you know
it's it's all right it's not better but
it is functional there was quite
infamously an armor design in season one
of the witcher which was
less well received so here's some
nilfgaardian armor from the witcher 2.
here's geralt's wearing some variation
of it in the witcher 3 and here it is in
the witcher season one
yeah and it's really not much better
when you can see the detail either
witcher season two toss a coin to your
redesigner because that looks much
better but
hmm now there is not much about this
armor that i can say that has not
already been said but we're going to try
and be fair we're going to try and look
at this functionally and aesthetically
and
characterizely
we're going to try okay it does at least
cover the important bits they have
helmets there is some form of neck
coverage though i'm not quite sure what
it's made of but it just looks
weird and not the threatening kind of
weird i mean they are protected but they
look like moldy potatoes
because i mean from a protection
perspective this is way better than
siri's midriff bearing male shirt but it
just doesn't do the thing that it's
meant to do from a character perspective
it doesn't make me want to take these
guys seriously now the series team said
that they wanted the armor to look kind
of thrown together the armor had to look
like they picked it up they did it
quickly and they put them on them it's
not meant to have the same look as
standard armor see also it was quite
important to make them look alien in a
way so they wanted a kind of ragtag
conscript look but they also wanted them
to look weird which is fine and that
would definitely not be the impression
that you get from the season 2 redesign
which looks much more like the armor in
the games i.e rich people armor however
rotting potatoes are just not very scary
and if you want to ragtag thrown
together army look there are
alternatives i mean helmets are
reasonably standard you can make them in
a couple of sizes and if your head
doesn't fit it you can always pad it
when you want to do that generally
avoiding things that have to fit too
well would be useful so you want
something which is cohesive in terms of
colors and maybe having the little star
sun whatever it is on it but you can
have lots of different materials so
maybe rich nils guardians get to look
more like this whereas the ones who are
reasonably well off but not quite so
much get this and then it sort of goes
down as you get poorer non-standardized
armor is the thing though you want the
nilfguardians to look similar to each
other but good as opposed to what they
look like now which is identical but bad
if you want ragtag you need people to
dress differently from each other
alright so we've established that all of
the nilfgaardians except for these ones
are close according to your designer
because i love all of them but this last
design i need your help because i have
an opinion but i don't know why i have
the opinion and
maybe you can help me figure it out so
queen kalanthi there are so many cool
details that i like about this armor i
love the lion claws on her spoulders i
like the lion detail on her breastplate
and the sort of fluting that's really
cool i like the existence of a helmet
you call it low standards i call it
accurate expectations of hollywood i
like the colors i look at the
breastplate and i don't automatically
think that is much too long it might be
too long but i can't actually tell which
is a definite improvement but
but i look at this armor right and
something just
seems off
and i don't know what it is which makes
me automatically put this into respect
doesn't make history instead of into the
top tier but maybe we can work it out
together is it that everyone else gets
pauldrons and she only gets spolders is
it the lack of upper arm protection when
everything else is so well covered like
i get that she's maybe not going to have
the same endurance as the big burly
knights and so you want to put her in
lighter armor but still you know
something jack chan exists i'm just
saying i learned about it recently i
think it's really cool you could have
had that or does it just
fit wrong
i don't know i don't know i don't know
what i'm seeing or if it's all of those
things or if it's something else
entirely but respect doesn't make
history it's not bad armor but there's
something that's keeping it out of the
top tier and for the life of me i
couldn't tell you what it is but it's
there anyway i have actually watched a
few more episodes of the witcher since
last we spoke about it but that's not
really relevant to this video and so it
is discussed at more length in the
extended version which is for patrons
and people who have joined my youtube
channel as channel members that is why
there's now a join button uh-huh so if
you want to support the show but you're
not really a patreon person but you
figure youtube already knows where i
live then you can now hit the red button
below and join the channel and get
access to cool extended videos okay cool
might be an overstatement but extended
videos nonetheless if you like listening
to me ramble at greater length these
things are for you either way more armor
content coming soon up here i hope is
the previous video i did which was an
armor review which people seem to like
and i'll see you next time