It's just weird. I was actually born in Kuwait, right?
I left Kuwait after the first Gulf War. I was nine years old.
I went to a nice private British English school in Kuwait.
I wore a little vest and a bow tie to school.
I was an adorable Arab kid with a hint of a British accent.
I was like, "'Ello, Mum. Yeah, going to school I am, Mummy.
Yeah, all right, yeah."
Then I ended up in Houston, Texas. Very proud... I'm a very proud Houstonian.
Super-proud Houstonian from Alief.
I'm for real.
But hold on, hold on. When I got there, they put me in ESL class...
which is English as a second language class,
and I was the only guy that spoke English in this fuckin' class.
And my family sends me to school with a vest and a bow tie,
thinking, "That's how you go to school."
No, that's how you get your ass whooped at school in America.
I walk in, all the kids are looking at me like, "Hola.
Amigo...
[speaking Spanish]
I was like...
"Sorry?
What language are you speaking?"
All of a sudden, this other dude just comes up out of nowhere.
He's like, "You're weird, dude.
Golly, man!
Why do you talk like that, eh?"
And that was my teacher. You know, it was fucked up.
My family did no research.
Not one person thought of, like,
"Hey, what neighborhood should we move into in Houston?
Let's just fucking go to a bunch of gang violence.
That'll make sense."
It was very tough. I didn't know what to do.
I was caught in the middle of this gang battle.
There was a lot of Mexican gangs, a lot of Black gangs,
and they were fighting each other.
And the Mexican gangs wanted to recruit me 'cause they thought I was Mexican.
And there was a lot of Black gangs. They wanted...
They wanted to beat me up 'cause they thought I was Mexican.
Really tough high school years.
I'm, like, walkin' to school, and I see these Latino gangs hangin' out,
and, obviously, this guy has seen me before
and he'd just had it.
He just approaches me.
He was like, "Say, vato!
You walk by here every day. You don't say nothin', don't do nothin'.
What?
You ashamed of your own peoples, bro?
You ashamed of your own people? This is your familia, bro!
Your la raza, bro! You ashamed of your own peoples, bro?
Andale, bro. You going to get broke today, bro.
What's your name, bro?
Andale, what's your name?"
I was like, "Oh, man, my name is Mohammed." He's like, "What?
For real, bro? You look exactly like Hector!
I swear to God, bro."
He was like, "Hector, Hector, come check it out, dude! Check it out, bro!
We found your doppelganger. Te lo juro, bro! Te lo juro!"
And the fucked-up part is Hector came out.
I was like, "Holy shit, I do look like Hector!"
Started high-fivin' and shit.
I was like, "Oh, yeah, we all look alike! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!"
And then I saw some guns stickin' out.
I was like, "Oh, shit, I need to get the hell out of this situation."
And I did and I had a decent day.
I really did. And then, uh, I'm going home and I see the Black gangs hangin' out
and I was like, "Please. Please, not today.
I'm not emotionally prepared to deal with this today.
Please, just not today!"
And, of course, they smelled that fear from a mile away.
For real! And this guy comes up to me, he was like, "Say, Jose!
You in the wrong motherfuckin' neighborhood, Jose.
You done fucked up today, Jose!
Where your crew at, Jose?"
I'm lookin' around for Jose. I'm like, "Who the hell is Jose?"
I was like, "Come on, man. My name is Mohammed."
He goes, "Ah, man! Salaam alaikum, brother, shit, my bad!" You know?