What are some of the lies we tell ourselves about money?
You might be amazed to know
that your relationship with money,
your beliefs about money,
are often formed before you are five years old.
So what did you hear in your house about money growing up?
You'll often hear this a lot,
"People like us don't have that money."
"Look at those rich people
they don't know they're born."
"Good people and spiritual people don't have money."
"Money doesn't grow on trees."
Here's the weirdest one,
"I don't know where to find the money."
Imagine saying to your mum, "Hey mum, can I have a book?
Can I have some shoes?"
"Don't know where to find the money."
Nobody says, "Oh, I'll just go out for a walk,
and I'll find the money to buy you those Nike trainers,"
because we don't find money.
We learn to monetize a gift,
but imagine growing up hearing your parents say,
"I can't find the money."
"I don't know where the money's coming from."
"Money just slips through my fingers."
"I run out of money before I run out of week."
My little girl years ago said to me,
"Mummy, you don't have to ask Daddy for money, you know.
You just go to the bank and they give it to you,"
because that's what she thought.
She also thought you put some plastic in a wall,
and the wall gave you money.
So if she asked for something, she'd go,
"Well the wall will give you the money, Mummy, to buy that."
Actually, I quite loved that,
that she had a belief that the wall would deliver money.
And here's another thing we often do when we're kids.
"Can I have money?"
"No, I haven't got any money."
"I don't have money."
"What do you think, I'm rich?"
"Do you think I'm made of money?"
Occasionally parents say,
"Well, you can have money, but you've got
to put out the trash every day, or mow the lawn."
And then we have to do... really jobs that we hate.
"I got to wash up every night to get money."
And although that sounds like a good idea,
what you're doing is teaching your kid
you've got to do what you hate to get money.
It's better to think of what does your kid love?
Do they love cooking?
Try to get them to do something they love
to get more money.
And so we hear so many lies about money.
"Spiritual people don't want money."
"People who have money are bad people."
You know, I found something quite different.
Many of my clients are millionaires and billionaires,
and I find that when you've got so much money,
what often happens is you start doing good things.
I was at a wedding this weekend, my daughter's wedding,
and the person who owned the place where she got married,
it's called Wilderness,
has got so much money, he's a billionaire,
and he's actually rewilding it,
creating hedges for butterflies and bees,
and giving back,
'cause when you've got that much money,
what else are you going to do?
And many clients with so much always say,
"Hey, I'm Oprah Winfrey, I'm buying schools.
I'm creating orphanages.
I'm educating girls."
And so you shouldn't think
that people with money are mean people,
'cause often, when they've got so much,
they actually do good things
where they start to fund hospitals.
Look at Cadbury's, and Bournville
and all the things that they did.
And that's always been the case.
So, people who have money are not mean,
and bad,
and unspiritual.
Some are,
many aren't.
Many do amazing things with their money.
Look at Shakira, who's always helping animals.
Look at Madonna, who's created a whole school system
in Malawi.
And so you need to get past this belief
that good people don't have money.
Good, meek people.
In the Bible it says, "The meek will inherit the earth,"
but meek is Aramaic for 'spiritual person',
and some spiritual people have a lot of money,
and do good things with it.
There's somebody in England called Barnardo's
who created a children's home.
So you need to look at the lies you tell yourself.
"People like me don't have money."
"Money comes from money."
"People like us can't have money."
"I can't keep money."
"I don't know where the money goes."
You see, that isn't true.
You do know where it goes,
and you can keep it,
and having parents who say, "Turn the lights off...
do you think I'm made of money?"
"I can't afford that."
"We can't afford that."
"It's too expensive."
My daughter, like all children,
was going, "Mummy, can I have this?"
"Can I have that?"
And I would never say no.
I'd go, "Yeah. Do you really want that?"
"Yes."
"Okay, then you will have that for your birthday."
"You'll have that at Christmas."
"You'll have that when you've got 100 stars."
because when children hear, "No, no, we haven't got money."
"Who do you think you are?"
"I can't afford that."
I see this played out,
a little kid in a shop and mum says,
"Do you want some chocolate? Pick something.
(gasps)
"Who do you think you are?"
"That's far too expensive."
"You've embarrassed me."
And here's even worse,
"I want never gets."
That's a terrible expression,
I want never gets,
because when you want something so much,
you'll often go out and create a desire to make it happen.
So go back and think of all the things you heard about money
that were wrong.
"A fool and his money is easily parted."
That was my father's favorite expression,
followed by, "You paid that for that?"
"Oh, they must have seen you coming."
But I said, "But Dad, that gave me pleasure.
It was worth every penny."
You know, I paid a lot of money for my daughter's wedding,
and it was a lot, but it was worth it.
You know what?
I'd pay more.
It was worth every penny.
And so when we're buying things,
here's something to remember.
Everything you want, without question,
is 'cause of one thing.
How it's going to make you feel.
And if you think buying an experience,
buying a hot air balloon ride,
going on a camel ride to see the pyramids in Egypt,
buying yourself a nice expensive shirt,
buying yourself a nice meal,
buying organic vegetables,
or not organic,
makes you feel good.
Everything we want is because of how it makes us feel,
and when you can get the feeling without the things,
then you know that you're winning.
So whatever you want in your life,
don't think, "Oh, I can't afford that."
Think, "You know, one day I'll have all of that,
but I'm going to be happy now."
I often say to my husband, when we were first married,
we didn't have the money we have now, but we were so happy.
We always flew in economy and it was great.
When I had my very first apartment was a studio apartment,
just one room,
and I loved that apartment.
My first car was a beaten-up Mini.
I loved that car.
It gave me pleasure.
And often we get a bigger apartment, a bigger car,
we start to fly first class, which is of course, amazing,
but it's a choice.
It's a choice to remember,
our happiest moments are often having a picnic.
My happiest moments as a kid
were picking berries with my grandmother, and making jam.
Didn't cost anything.
My daughter loved it when we'd bake in the house,
and actually, looking back at her childhood and mine,
it was the simple things that gave me pleasure.
Being with people, and maybe baking together,
playing card games.
Every Christmas we played board games,
and that was such a source of joy.
More than the gifts, more than the food,
was that playing cards together.
So think about what you want,
why you want it,
how it will make you feel.
You think, "Well, can I feel like that without it?"
If the answer is yes, you are doing so well.
And stop saying things.
"They've got money to burn."
"It will all end in tears."
"Nobody can have it all."
That is not true.
"No one can have it all."
"Your school days are the best days of your life."
That isn't true.
Nature isn't going, "Hey, here's you,
going to give you a great life.
The beginning's amazing,
and then it's all downhill."
"Life isn't fun when you get older."
"People only like young, attractive people."
None of that is true.
What's true is the meaning you make of something.
You can have a relationship with money.
The more you have, the more you can get back,
enjoy what you've got.
But find things that you're not spending money on
that give you immense pleasure.
If you really want to know how to attract money,
how to manifest money,
how to create wealth,
how to create success,
please sign up today for my 21-day Abundance Challenge,
because you can have it all, all the time.
You can have so much abundance.
You don't have to come from it.
I didn't come from it,
but you can create it.
Sign up.
It's going to be my honor and my joy
to show you how to do that.