- Welcome back to another segment of,
"Behind the Scenes of The Waltons."
Today, I'm continuing my conversation, very in depth,
a little different for my usual conversations
with guest stars, but Willie and I decided to track through
a number of aspects of the time we've known each other
and our various careers and just life
and the journey that one sometimes ends up taking in life.
So please join me
as I continue my conversation with Willie Aames.
- I realize in talking with you that, I mean, I knew, eh,
this much about you from a certain interaction,
and because of our shared background,
which is minimal by comparison with your whole life,
and you've just, you're remarkable.
I mean, what you've gone through and that you haven't,
that you turned your life around
and you got back on track and you made it work.
You didn't whine and complain and go poor me
and everybody owes me and, you know, bravo.
I mean, you're a remarkable person.
And listening to your stories are, it's just a testament
to who you are and your, and your character,
and that we all have those moments, those turning points
in our life where things, you know, go better or worse.
And how we respond to them and how we get on with our life,
you know, says so much about who we are.
So, I mean, my, I always loved and respected you
but now I'm just like, oh my God, you are,
you know, bravo.
I mean, really and I'm just very moved by your story
and I'm so glad that we have reconnected at this point
in your life where things are going well for you.
I know you've been very happily married.
You found a, Winnie is a wonderful, wonderful woman.
So you're a success story and surviving Hollywood
and surviving being a child star.
We've both heard and know so many not so happy endings.
And it's difficult growing up
in the spotlight as a child actor.
- It is. - Or when your career takes,
you know, when you're not at the top of your game anymore
and you're not, it's a flavor of the month kind of business.
You know, when you're out, you're out.
You're not flavor of the month anymore
and you gotta get on with your life.
So it's challenging and putting yourself into
a good path that you have created for yourself
that has brought you to this point where
I think you're happy. (laughing)
- I am. You know, I'm gonna share something with you
if you'll bear with me for just a moment.
It's always fascinated me
and hurt me when people somehow take personalities
like you or myself or anyone else
that's had any measure of success in the industry.
And somehow there's a certain amount of shame attached to
no longer being in the limelight
or no longer being at the top of your game.
And I'm sharing this with you
because it's something that I wrote.
It's my definition of has-been, it's a noun, informal,
definition, "A derogatory term utilized by the insecure
to describe a level of success they've neither achieved
nor understand." (Judy laughing)
And what I've learned is that society changes,
societal tastes change, societal norms change,
shows and careers move on.
People's lives change.
I mean, I've experienced as much change, I think
as anybody, you know, I mean, I woke up at 47.
I was no longer a producer, a director, a writer,
an executive, you know, a celebrity, a husband, a father.
I didn't know what I was, I was 47, 48 years old
and I had to start over from scratch.
No one wanted to know me,
especially after all of that publicity.
No one wanted to know me.
And I had to really come to terms with how do I become
the best me I can be?
And one of the things that I really had to deal with
was the shame that gets heaped on us
if we haven't maintained a level of achievement
that the world thinks we should.
I was watching the, the Hall of Fame inductees a while back
and recognizing, you know, they're my hero's age.
You know, the people that you know
and thinking of what social media might say to them
about the way that they've aged
and how their bodies look and all of this
sort of expectation.
And to me, they were just the most wonderful thing.
You know, they were, we all had our reading glasses,
you know, and our bodies have changed and some of us,
you know, have things in different places now.
And what I've really learned is that it's okay.
It's really okay that all of these things change
and it's really okay because you and I get to sit
and do things like this where we get to talk
and share our experiences and connect again
on a much deeper level with those experiences.
I mean, you on stage and doing your, as a producer
and a writer and continuing to be creative
and perform at a level that suits you.
And, you know, it's one of the big reasons why I just left,
for the third time, another, executive position
at yet another company that was global.
Because I still feel as though,
if I'm going to be true to those things,
those lessons that I learned, I need to sort of step back
and not allow myself to get sucked into a life
that doesn't mean anything.
There's somebody that I think you know,
who called me a few weeks ago and said his cancer was back.
And he had been in remission, somebody very well known
in the industry, and he'd been in remission for 18 months.
And I went over and sat with him and I said, how you doing?
And he said, when you walk into a doctor's office
and you look at a monitor and it says 0.03 on the monitor,
and that three represents how many months
you have left to live, it's pretty jarring.
And this guy has worked with the biggest names in Hollywood.
And I said, are you okay?
And he said, no, because I had 18 months of remission
and I worried about all the wrong things.
- [Judy] Hmm. Wow.
- And now I can't get them back.
And that Judy was, I've lost so many friends,
we're losing friends in the industry
and people that we all knew, the Tony Dows and the,
Hank Saroyan's and the Ron Zimmerman's
and all of the people that I really adored.
And I really looked at my life and said,
okay, just recently, my wife Winnie and I,
now the ships brought me to Vancouver where I met my wife.
And we just wrote a Hallmark movie based on,
inspired how we met.
And I knew when I sold the script and got the movie produced
let alone it being, you know, about our romance.
I was back.
I had achieved what I needed to achieve when I was lying
in the bushes in that, you know, at the Hollywood Bowl
saying, I am not gonna end up a statistic.
I am gonna fight my way back.
And when that movie got made, when that movie aired
and I sat with, you know, the love of my life
and I watched the story about us taking place
on the screen, I knew, I was back.
And I knew at that moment too, that I also needed to move on
from the comfort level of where I was.
And this experience with this dear friend
who is going through such a tough challenge
and I have no fewer than four
going through the same sort of challenge right now.
I realize that all of these experiences
and all of these relationships and all of these things
that we've been so privileged to do
and so lucky to be a part of, the good and the bad,
the ups and the downs, I'm absolutely grateful
for every single moment of them.
And it's time now to not only give back,
but go back to those things that inspire me.
Not creating some other social media campaign for a company
or not doing this, but what are the things
that really inspire me?
And then I started watching your podcast,
and I said, you know, Judy's tapping into one
of the great things in her life and in my life.
And in our, the fans of the show's life.
And I'm gonna do more, 'cause I typically turn these down.
I mean, I turn them down continuously.
And I want to thank you for the opportunity
to remember why I do what I do
and why we did what we did.
And to reminisce about the most,
some of the most wonderful moments of our lives
and really enjoy the time that we have left.
You know, that's what it's about now.
It's about, if I looked back in my life
over the, who knows how much time we have, right?
But if at some point you look back,
can you look back at that time and say,
time well spent. - [Judy] Hmm.
- Time well spent, so that's why I've pulled back.
That's why I've connected with you,
you’re time well spent. - Thank you.
- Chatting with you and being in your life
and being your friend and being a part of it,
is time well spent.
And thank you for letting me do that.
- Wow. Thank you so much.
I mean, this to me.
Yeah. The people are what the, yeah.
The activity was enjoyable
but the people made the activity enjoyable
'cause I'm sure you have, I've certainly done jobs where
I couldn't wait for the job to be over
because it was miserable.
And the, you know, because I will deal with
really difficult situations on a job.
If it's a good, it's a good group
and the people make it worthwhile, then you're like,
okay, I will change in a closet.
I will, you know, be freezing.
I will work 18 hour days, I will.
But you get in something where the conditions could be great
but the people just treat you like you're nothing
and it's miserable and people aren't enjoying it.
And it's like, I don't wanna be there.
So more and more, and I think that's what the 50 years
now of The Waltons most means.
I mean, we're really proud of the show
but that I still have so many people, our cast
who are still like family and always have been.
But I'm getting this chance through this show to reconnect
with people I hadn't talked with in ages.
And some of them I can't reach
and some of 'em I don't know how to reach.
And some of them go, no, thank you.
And, but it, it just, yeah.
It's, it really is the people in my life.
So, and you are one of those people.
- Well you've been always,
you've always been an inspiration.
Always.
I remember, I remember you on the show
and I remember that you had a whole vision
for what you were doing then.
I don't know whether you knew you gave
that persona off or not, but you even then,
and even when we've had lunch together
and we've talked about different projects
and I've always been so proud of,
you stood up for what you wanted to be.
And you've always gone and done your own thing.
And I think when you're that focused
maybe you don't realize what sort of power
you sort of radiate
and you've always radiated a confidence
and a power and a direction.
I remember thinking during Battle in the Network Stars
sometimes and not only is she a competitor
but you just seem to have your act together.
And it was, and it's an inspiration.
It's one of those things where you,
like people leave that impression.
It's like, Gregory Harrison, you know, I mean,
he's just the sweetest, like most lovable guy on the planet
and you are as well, but you have a confidence
that I never had.
And I think that's what it was, is I never,
even for all that I did, I was never a confident person.
I was always very, you know, mortified.
I was always scared to death my entire life.
But you seem to have that confidence
and I remember taking that from you when you, you know,
away when we worked together.
- Well, thank you.
You know, that means a lot to me.
I really, I just, this has been such a gift to have this
time with everything and as busy as you are
and having to deal with the phone calls and the whatever,
I was just so grateful for you to make time for this.
And you know, I know...
- I'm really grateful that you allowed me to do it.
I felt a little foolish commenting on your Facebook page,
you know, 'cause I was baiting you.
I was hoping you'd ask me.
- Oh, I don't even know if I saw that.
- Yeah, yeah, you did.
- 'Cause I had reached out to you once before
and asked you and I never got a response, so.
- So I hesitated.
I went, well he kinda never answered me before.
- Yeah. I'm so sorry.
- And so I thought, well, I'll try it again.
The worst that'll happen is he'll say no.
And I know we'll still be friends.
Even if you said, no, I don't care to do it.
- No, I was watching your episodes
and I was at particularly with David
and I was watching those things on, oh, I wanna,
I'm her friend, I wanna be on her show.
You know, she didn't ask me,
but I didn't realize that you had.
- Yeah. That sometimes messages get...
- I thought I was being clever.
- I just don't watch Facebook enough.
I just don't have the time to get on my Facebook page
as much as I'd like.
And I try to at least read all the comments
on my YouTube, but beyond that, it's like
there's only so many hours in a day.
- Yeah. Well, it's been a privilege.
Thank you very much, Judy.
I really appreciate it and I appreciate you having me on.
Like I said, anything for you, whatever you need,
you let me know, I'm there.
- Same right back at you.
Who knows what these next phases of our life will be.
Who knows whether you'll see Judy and Willie
and what we might be doing. (laughing)
- The best - That's right.
- The best phase. - Yeah.
- I remember I was doing, I used to do all
of the commercials for Branson, Missouri when I was living
in Kansas City and I was chatting with Tony Orlando.
Remember Tony Orlando and Dawn?
- Yeah. Yeah.
- And I remember Tony saying, you know
like Mel Tillis was there and Andy Williams was there
and the Lennon sisters were there
and the Osmonds were there and everybody was there.
And I was talking with Tony and I said,
what do you think about, Yakov Smirnoff and all that?
And he said, what do you think about all of this?
He goes, Willie, you're not seeing an old Osmond
or the old Lennon sisters or the old Tony Orlando
or the old Andy Williams.
You're seeing the best, Andy Williams,
the best Osmonds, the best Lennon sisters, the best.
And I'm like, you know what, you're right, you're right.
And I just, you know what an inspiration he is too
to sort of just grow into the next phase.
So let's do it together.
- Absolutely. - All right.
- I really wanna thank Willie for coming
and being my special guest.
I hope you've enjoyed this.
I'll be back with more, "Behind The Scenes of the Waltons,"
and more Ask Judy.
Thanks for watching.