So I'm sitting there on the couch.
I got my work boots propped
up on the coffee table.
I'd made it from repurposed
wood from a shed out back
with my roommate Linda.
And on this particular day it was not
one of those murder mysteries.
It was a movie called The Truth About Jane.
And I don't want to bore you straighties
with the plot of this movie, but...
basically, a young girl in high school
realizes that she is a lesbian and her mom,
she's like, "Boo."
And then...
by the end of the movie, her mom is like, "Yay!"
And that's the movie.
So I'm sitting there and all of this like,
hits me like a ton of bricks.
I'm like, "Oh, my God.
Oh, my God."
And I say out loud for the first time
in my entire life, I go,
"Oh, my God. I'm gay."
And I came to that conclusion from watching
a Lifetime movie!
What?
It was like all these missing
puzzle pieces were coming into frame.
Everything became more clear.
It's like I was watching the movie The Sixth Sense.
I had been gay all along.
And listen, there are conservative
people out there who will argue,
they say, "You cannot let
our youth watch gay content.
It is going to make them gay."
And now I'm like,
"They're right."
They're right. Listen, I don't want to go
against my own people,
but they are right.
Because if I had not watched
a Lifetime movie,
who knows?
Who knows? I'd probably be some housewife
just yelling at my husband, Tim.
You know?
He's out drinking with his friends.
I'm at home taking care of the kids,
cleaning up the house, doing
laundry, but Tim is not around.
I swear to God, Tim.
But that's not my journey, y'all.
I'm gay. Thanks, Lifetime.
So after this huge self discovery,
I had to catch everyone else up in my life.
And it's a nerve wracking conversation,
so I decided to start with my brothers.
So, I go home.
I'm so nervous. I'm like...
I'm like, "Guys,
I've got to tell you something, um.
Woo, okay, uh...
I'm gay.
And my brothers go,
"Duh."
Cool, cool, cool. Cool.
Well, thanks for telling me that.
You didn't want to tell me that
when I was walking in a white wedding gown?
And I said, "Well, just out of curiosity like,
what made you think I was gay this whole time?"
And one of my brothers goes, "Well,
once when you were seven,
you got hit with a soccer ball
and you yelled, 'Ow, my dick!'"
All right.
Clearly, I was very confused.
I was actually most nervous to tell my mom.
And people are pretty surprised by this
because she's fairly liberal by nature,
but she's also a debutante.
And at this point she was dating
a different, very conservative,
very religious man.
She clearly developed a type.
So I decided I was going to take her
to my favorite Chinese restaurant
to break the news because I thought, well,
even if she disowns me
I can at least eat some crab rangoons.
And that'll make me happy.
So we're sitting there and I
finally get the courage to tell her.
I say, "Mom,
I'm gay."
And she just goes stone faced and she's quiet.
She doesn't say a word and this goes on forever.
So I'm trying to stay in the moment
and not break eye contact.
I don't know what she's thinking.
I'm like, "Is this the end
of our relationship? Does she hate me?"
And I'm, I'm just sitting there and...
I really want that crab rangoon.
Why-- Why'd they put it all the way-- all the way over there?
And finally, she got up.
She startled me. She grabbed her purse.
And she said, "Let's go.
We're going to Hooters and we're going
to tell them it's your birthday."
Yeah!