Here's a good question, "How do I tell my
husband I need more attention?"
My name is Paul Friedman, I founded The
Marriage Foundation. You could utilize
our free service of the counselor.
You could peruse the website. Subscribe
to this channel that you do
for sure and let's get into this topic.
"How do I tell my husband I need more
attention?"
So, what happens if
your husband tells you he needs
something?
Be honest, what is your initial
reaction? I know what it is because I've
studied human nature.
When we are told by someone
they need something from us,
our first
visceral reaction is to put up a wall.
Isn't it? Right? So,
we have learned when we need something
from somebody
to be very tactful in how
we put that message out and I'm talking
about everywhere in life.
You don't -- just go up to
someone say, "Hey, I need this."
"Hey, could you give me that?" Because you
already know
they're going to put up a wall if you do
it that way.
Well, your husband is no different. He's
got human nature going too and if you
tell him
"I need more attention," his first reaction
is going to be
to put up a wall
which is the last thing you want.
So I can't tell you specifically
what to do because
you are unique in how you communicate.
And if I tell you, "Just do it this way,
just do it that way," you're not
going to be able to pull it off
because it won't fit your personality
and it may not fit his personality
because he's unique.
What I can tell you and stress
is that you need to understand your
husband
more in order to be able to communicate
in some other way
that attention is going to be of a
benefit
not just to you
because by telling him that right
away you're coming across as being
self-centered
even if you don't think you are
but it has to be of a benefit to him.
I mean maybe
when he gives you attention, all you do
is complain.
How's that going to work out? How would
it work out for you?
Maybe you just want his attention to let
him know he's got to fix
certain things, that's not going to work
out either.
But if every time he's giving you
attention,
you're lovey, affectionate,
arousing him, giving him
emotional juice and love from the heart,
he's going to want to give you attention.
I'm just giving you things to think
about.
Now I could tell you for sure in broad
terms, if you learn more about marriage
which this should be included and it is
in my books and in the course for women
and of course for men too.
Then not just this particular problem
but all your problems will dissolve
when you approach your marriage in a
very positive way
with the desire to get more love
and to get more happiness those should
be the driving
forces in your mind
every time you're about to say or do
something
with your husband. Is this going to
create more happiness?
Is this going to create more love? That I
can tell you
generally and it's 100% accurate and
irrefutable.
So think about it, think about what I've
shared with you.
You have what is considered to be a
pretty common problem in the world and
it's a common problem because people
have not been educated about
relationships, about human nature,
about themselves, about gender
differences. These are all what go
into a healthy happy and
productive marriage all of these things
are important.
So subscribe to the channel, like this
video, leave a comment.
Thank you for spending time with me! God
bless you! God bless your husband and
take care! By the way,
you could write into The Marriage
Foundation -- it's a free service. You could
also leave
a question in the comment box. I
personally respond to those.
Take care! God bless!