- Do you want other people to like you?
Do you want to become friends with the popular kids,
or the successful people,
or even the famous people?
Do you want to be the person
that everyone else wants to be friends with?
Well, you're about to learn the simple trick
that will make all of this happen.
I want you to think back to your first day of high school
where you were feeling nervous and scared
because you didn't really know anyone.
And seeing all the attractive girls
and the popular kids probably made you feel a little shy.
And the only thing that you really wanted
was to be liked and accepted by the other kids.
At least this is how I personally felt.
I can still remember looking at those popular kids,
and thinking to myself,
How happy and how complete my life would be
if I could just hang out with them.
Or how excited I would feel
if I could go to one of their exclusive parties.
And then I could post pictures with them on social media
showing everyone that I was one of the cool kids.
Because I really wanted them to like me,
I was always very cautious
not to say the wrong thing around them,
or to bring up something
that I thought they would think is lame or stupid.
This behavior is known as walking on eggshells,
and I walked on those eggshells
throughout my entire high school life
going all the way into my college years.
I did have friends during this time,
but even the people who did like me, did not like all of me.
They liked the parts of me
that I was comfortable showing them.
I never really opened up about my hobbies
that I thought were stupid,
or my interests that I thought were weird.
At that time in my life
the only person who knew the real me was the person
who would stare back at me in the mirror
every single morning.
And I think this is how a lot of people live their lives
when they meet somebody new,
they put on their fake public persona.
The things that they say and the things that they do
will always be influenced
by who they are hanging around with.
And almost always they will keep certain things
about themselves a secret.
And those sharp eggshells are just always there.
I think most of us here can agree
that we don't really like people who are fake,
we don't like it when someone acts overly nice all the time,
or when someone pretends to be our friend,
or pretends to sympathize with us.
We don't like people
who pretend to be someone who they aren't.
But the irony of this is that, a lot of people who say
they don't like people who are fake,
are usually, to some extent, fake themselves.
But most of the time they aren't being fake
because they are trying to manipulate someone,
or trying to take advantage of someone.
They are being fake because they are scared.
They're scared that if they express who they truly are,
their family will be disappointed in them,
or their friends just won't want to talk to them anymore.
They are scared that the world they live in
will reject their authentic self,
which is a very scary thought for most people.
The problem with this though,
is that the longer you walk on those eggshells,
the sharper they will become.
And if you can't become comfortable
living your authentic self,
then you will slowly start to lose your sense of identity.
In fact, that's how most people are.
Their entire identity
is just a collection of external influences
from things like their parents, or their friends,
or social media, or society.
However, there is a very small group of people
who do live that authentic life that's not based on fear,
and it's these people that are usually liked the most.
The simple trick that will get people to like you
is to stop consciously
trying to get other people to like you.
The moment when you can go up
to that really attractive girl,
or that really popular kid,
or even that famous person without caring
if they like you or not,
is the moment when a lot of them
will start to like you
because you will be one of the very few people
on planet earth who is not being fake.
Wait, Mitch, what if I meet somebody
who is authentically a horrible person,
or a crazy person who wants to hurt people?
Are you saying that I will like them
because they are being authentic?
No, I'm not saying that.
Obviously, there are some exceptions,
and of course, there will always be some people
who just won't like you no matter what.
Maybe you have a single character trait
that they just really hate for whatever reason.
Or I don't know, maybe you remind them in some way
of their childhood bully.
They might actually be jealous
of the fact that you have the power
to be authentic, and they don't.
But most of the time, within reason,
if you're being real people will like you,
or at the very least,
they will respect and appreciate the fact
that you are being authentic
as opposed to being fake like most of the world.
If you want to actually become that authentic person,
then you need to learn how to stop caring
what other people think of you.
And if you want to learn how to do that,
then click the screen now
and watch the video that I made on it,
and I'll see you there.
(gentle music)