*intro music* Ho ho hello! Hope you're diggin' the Christmas
tree and my party hat! Cost me 3.2 bil in Runescape.
Ridiculous. Anyway, I'm an American.
I've lived in London for over a year now. You can imagine I've made quite a number of
faux pas: Little mistakes that culturally I just don't
understand, so without further ado, here are the top 5 British faux pas I've ever made.
Number 5 I guess a lot of Americans make this when
moving abroad. I swear to God it happens to me like every
other day. There was this girl in class.
I said wow that girl's got some nice corduroys. So I went up to her and said: Hey *snaps*
Carla! I like your pants. Whoah! Everyone's insulted. Evan just was
cheeky as hell. Complimented that girl's underwear.
What's he lookin' at. Calm down British people. Come on.
Everyone knows that Americans say pants. Just deal with it.
Number 4 So I was at a party the other day
And my friend Jamie is very well-known for having a full-figured beard.
And he had one at the beginning of the party. However, halfway through I went out for a
breath of fresh air and there he is
completely naked on top (of his face)
And I said Jamie! Where'd the beard go? Have you been shaven this entire time?
And he said no, Evan Don't worry about it, man.
I always shave when I get pissed. And I put my hand on his shoulder and I said
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that! Is everything okay?
Why are you so angry? Everyone laugh!
Everyone laughed at me. That was it. Everyone. Pfft.
Stupid American. Pissed means drunk. *goofy laugh*
What. Pissed means angry. Not drunk.
Aww Here I was trying to be nice.
I'm just a stupid American. Number 3
I'm sure this is a mistake a lot of Americans have made while abroad, but this one actually
occurred to me while I was in California surrounded by my British friends.
I was driving through Los Angeles, and this person let me take a left turn.
So I wanted to thank them! I had both hands on the wheel, but I decided to lift one up,
*holds up peace sign backwards (2 fingers in a v-shape)*
WHOAH! WHOAH!
That literally means nothing to me! Everyone in the car was like
Why would you say that to them? Why would you swear at them?
They just let you turn! And I was like "I was just saying thank you
with my hand" That's not thank you!
That is not thank you! Okay.
I've also accidentally: Someone said how many of these would you like
and I went I'll have 2 please.
Whoah! Whoah!
That's just really insulting in England. Don't do it.
EVER. Everyone freaks out.
It's probably as bad as the middle finger. Which I understand.
But this? Peace sign backwards? I don't... I don't...
Whatever. Number 2!
I was making a video with my friend Danny about rules of the London underground
And it came to the point where he said Evan, do you listen to music?
And I said ya know what? I do.
Sue me! I'm blasting Ke$ha in my ears.
I'm sure everyone on this carriage can hear me.
And ya know what? If you don't like it, you can toss me off.
At this point he turned to me and said WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY!?
And I said If you don't like it, toss me off!
*through laughter* At which point he replied:
Evan, I wasn't gonna cover this one, but it's an unspoken rule you cannot toss someone off
on the underground. Little faux pas there.
In America, that just means to throw someone, ya know, off.
Throw them off the tube. In England, that means to uhhh....
Perform a little... something down low...
make them feel real good. Yeah uhh....
OH MY GOD I literally said if I'm listening to Ke$ha
you can wank me. WHAT!
Number 1 This one's incredibly embarrassing
It just happened a couple weeks ago at work If it doesn't show you that I still haven't
assimilated to British culture, I don't know what will.
I'm at work I made a huge mess all over my desk.
There was tea stains, there was digestive crumbs (poor grammar I know)
I had to clean it up! So I went to my boss, and I said
Hey man! Do you have any spare sanitary towels?
To which he said Pardon me?
And I said I made a mess; I really gotta clean it up.
And the females in the office just started dying.
And I was just like what's so funny?
I need a sanitary towel. I made a mess.
I need to clean it up. Oh my God.
If you don't know what that means Because you are American hopefully.
And hopefully you don't know what this means, and
I'm not just an idiot. Sanitary towel isn't a towel used to sanitise
things. As I thought it was when I used to work at
a pizza restaurant. A sanitary towel is a little pad that you
put in between your knickers When you're on your period.
So I was literally telling everyone HEY!
Hey I'm on my period! And it's REALLY BAD!
Please save me! Ahhh! Blood everywhere!
I made a mess! I still have a job so
I guess they keep me just because I entertain them.
So there it is! My top 5 British faux pas.
I hope you've had fun laughing at my misfortunes. Please do not make the same mistakes I do
because it's just incredibly embarrassing. Anyway thank you for watching
I hope you liked it And I hope you all have a Merry Christmas.
I'll see you guys next week. Good bye.
*cue catchy outro music* In my eyes
I was just saying you can't throw me off In his eyes I said please put your hand
on my penis... and perform things *laughter*
Perform things