We began by sending a dog into a wood to find our truffles.
And while he was doing that, I went to get my car.
This is it...
the new £840,000 Bugatti Veyron.
It's the fastest, most powerful
and most expensive road car the world has ever seen.
So, you two really think you can beat that, do you?
-Yep. -Well, we've got our truffles.
65 quid, that cost, for something that looks like a mummified testicle.
Now we've got to get them back to London.
-So, are you ready? -Yep.
Confident men. Best of luck. Try not to crash. See you there.
Have we really got our own plane?
-Yup. -Fantastic! Let's go.
-Hang on a second! Is that it? -Well, it's a Cessna 182.
James, it's pathetic!
It looks like something a builder would leave behind.
Honestly, it's a good kite, this.
-Kite? -Yeah.
Hello?
He's trying to make me go in the sky in something you'd see poking out of a skip.
What is it? What's it called?
A Cessna 182, whatever that is.
182 refers to the number of quid it cost, I suspect.
'Cause it's been standing overnight,
you have to make sure there's no sediment or water in the fuel.
-Is there sediment or water in the fuel? -Well, you have to check the drain points.
-You use a special cup. -Good. Look, it's clean.
You take a sample out and make sure there's no water,
which you'd see as a separate layer.
-See? Clear. -Good. Go! In the sky!
There are five of these on each side and two under the engine.
Okay, I'm doing 80 miles an hour now, the limit, and I'm, according to this,
using 50-brake horsepower.
So that's 950 to go.
-Got your seat belt on, Hammond? -Is this more checks?
Seat belt, put it on.
-Yeah, it's on! -Okay.
Hello, this is Cessna 182 Golf Bravo X-ray Zulu Mike
request taxi for a VFR flight to Lima Foxtrot Mike Hotel, please.
Roger. Line up zero-three. Report when ready.
I'm ready to go. Are you happy in the back?
To the skies!
We're in the air, Hammond!
-You love all this, don't you? -I quite like it, yeah.
The pre-flight checks had taken so long
that by the time they'd left Italian tarmac,
I was leaving Italy itself.
This is the Mont Blanc Tunnel,
where they had the terrible fire a couple of years ago,
So now they've got ferocious speed rules and there's a million speed cameras.
So I'll put it into automatic and relax.
James, why can I see the Med?
Because we couldn't go over the mountains. We had to route down towards Nice
and go along the coast a bit and then we'll head up...
We, the ones in the aeroplane, can't go over... over the mountains?
No, mate. Sorry.
So, Jeremy's car can go higher than your aeroplane as well as faster.
This was a major blow,
because while Jeremy had already cleared the Mont Blanc Tunnel,
and was steaming towards Switzerland,
we were heading southwest over the French Riviera,
and whichever way you cut it, that's the wrong way.
Yep, car-friendly Switzerland, and sure enough,
they'd sent a welcome party.
Come on!
-Hammond! -How you doing?
-I'm fine, how are you? -We're going the wrong way.
We're headed southwest, towards Nice right now.
-You're heading toward Nice? -We had to go around everything.
Apparently there's a big tree that could be a bit tricky for us.
Stop! Richard! Did you say you were heading for Nice!
Just don't laugh!
Is your car sounding like it might break down in the next ten minutes?
No. You've no idea, mate. It's phenomenal. It goes like a... [bleep]
So, an update on the race for you. I'm winning... by miles.
I was storming toward Dijon while the Wright brothers were refuelling
in St Etienne, 150 miles behind, which wasn't pleasing James.
How do you say, "Stop being such a trade unionist and get on with it"?
One day those guys will find a means of transport better than a car,
but I don't think today is that day!
Hammond, I ought to tell you I've only done two and a half hours
on this type of aircraft.
Right. So you're not entirely familiar?
I know what the major knobs do.
Hamster, are you really hammering along now?
We do have problems.
James has just told me that he hasn't done the test
that allows him to drive the plane at night.
So we're going to have to land.
And I quote, "Somewhere. Maybe Lille."
He really hasn't thought this through, has he?
If we could make Lille before night fell,
we were in with a chance of catching the Eurostar to London
and staying in the race.
Clear to land. Final. Runway 18.
That's probably the wrong order, but it's roughly right.
-You all right, Hammond? -Oh, yes. Just land.
It's tricky, man, it's windy.
We landed in Lille with moments to spare.
Hamster, where are you? You must be down by now.
We're down, yeah. Where are you?
Well, I'm about 70 miles from Calais.
-Right! Okay! That's good. -Come on.
The train's fast.
The good thing is, this is going to be seriously close.
Yes! This is a good thing.
Well, here we are. I've made it to Calais. Yes!
I don't want to lower the tone or anything,
but I haven't been to the loo since Italy and I'm gagging for it.
and the ones that way are out of order
and there's 42 British coaches through there
and they want my autograph.
I'd arrived back in Britain half an hour in front of Ginger and Algie,
but they were gaining fast.
Hamster! How are you?
We're on our train and doing quite nicely. We're 35 minutes from Waterloo.
It is down to the wire again.
Any minute now we'll see your headlights sweep past the window.
May the best man win.
-Where do you get these night buses? -Right outside.
Can you pay them in truffles?
-This is it! This is it! Excellent. -All right, go, go, go!
Another red light.
-James! -Yeah, I'm coming.
That's it!
This is it.
It's the NatWest Tower! I'm here!
Are they here?
-Good evening. -Good evening.
I don't know. I'm confused. Does that mean we've won? Where is he?
Well, I would say we've won. We're here and he's not.
-Look left. That's a shadow. -What's that reflection?
In the window of a ghostly figure!
Surely not!
That's horrible!
You unbearable man! I can't stand it!
-It's dignity. -Yes.
-Have you got your truffle? -Yes.
Well, unfortunately, they've already got one.
So, I'm afraid you're £65 out of pocket.