# Saturday! #
What are you doing here?
We double crossed Satan.
Now he's opened up some sort of hatch to hell
and unleashed loads of evil spirits into the world.
Somebody help! There is a ghost.
Suit up, gentlemen. You've got a world to save.
It's Fred Sirieix. He's possessed by a ghost. Shoot him!
Argh!
- What the hell is going on? - It's Roman.
You'll never stop me! Ha, ha, ha!
To shut the Hell Hatch, you need to use the bone key.
The Devil, he keeps it in his house in Hull.
The world needs us, Ant. Let's hit the highway to Hull!
SMASHING
Shush! Nice and easy.
OK.
Seems like nobody's home.
PHONE RING TONE WITH AN EVIL LAUGH
ANSWERPHONE: 'Hello, you've reached Satan.
'Please leave a message after the hellish scream.'
HELLISH SCREAM
'Dev, it's your boy Simon Cowell here.
'Are we still on for that drink Friday night? Let me know, mate.'
- Outrageous. - I know, can you believe
the most evil man in the history of the universe
is calling the Devil?
DOOR OPENS
Shush!
DISTANT CHATTER
BOTH GASP
- What the hell is that? - Look!
The ghost of Genghis Khan and Emperor Caligula?
They say I've killed a lot of people.
But, realistically, it's like, three or four...
million!
Oh, well, apparently I married my horse
and made it a crime to say the word "goat"!
Which is absolutely true. But, still, it's rude to gossip.
Exactly.
DEC SIGHS
How on earth are we gonna find this Hell Hatch key?
Could be absolutely anywhere.
DING
Look! It's a key.
And it comes with a map showing the exact location
of the Hell Hatch. That's handy!
This has all been far easier than I thought.
The devil's security measures are lax at best.
SIREN SOUNDS Run!
Oh, can we torture them? Can we?
Nah, let's just kill 'em,
and go and watch Tipping Point. - Oh, my God.
I'll handle this. Pass me the ghost blaster?
What? I brought the stuff to break in.
I thought you were bringing the blasters.
- I brought the sandwiches. - Cheese ploughman's?
- Mm. - Legend!
DEC GASPS Hi-yah!
Hey... use the book.
I'll try, but I don't think I can throw it that far.
No, no, read it!
- Read it. - Argh. Argh!
OK. OK. There must be something in here.
I'll try "Troubleshooting".
BOTH: Argh!
Ah, here we go.
When facing a ghost of extreme evil...
BOTH SCREAM
..as a last resort, you may summon a ghost of great good
with the following spell.
"Adajuve nos obugare mane"!
Who are you?
I am the founder of modern nursing, Florence Nightingale.
You idiot!
You've summoned up the ghost of Florence Nightingale
to take on two of the most evil men in history.
What's she gonna do? Nurse them to death?
Now, boys, let's put those silly weapons down
before someone gets very badly hurt.
Ah, step aside, you puny woman!
What's yowse gonna do about it?
Oh, I don't know, maybe... NECK CRACKING
..this.
SHE SHRIEKS Aye!
OK, OK, now let's find the Hell Hatch.
Sounds like fun.
Can I join?
MANIACAL LAUGHTER