Have you ever admired a co-worker who handled a tricky situation with
confidence? Have you ever wanted to do the same but perhaps didn't feel that
you had the ability to do so? Well, knowing how to be assertive at work
has its benefits and in this video I'm going to share with you four steps on
how to be assertive and respectful. Now, in order to be assertive and respectful
you got to be mindful because you have to understand what you're doing so stay
tuned to the end of this video so that I can give you a free download on how to
bring mindfulness into being assertive. Hi, if you're new here, welcome! My name is
Adriana Girdler and I'm a business productivity specialist. Knowing how to
be assertive can be tricky. It is not a natural skill that we have, however, it is
something that you totally have to choose to do and in this video I'm gonna
give you some techniques on just how to do that. Trust in yourself. One of the
first things in order to be assertive is that you have to have belief in yourself.
Do you know what you bring to the organization? Do you have any idea the
skillsets and the ideas that are going to help contribute to the bottom
line and the strategy? If you don't then in order for you to be assertive so that
you can be heard and your great ideas brought forth,
you should probably write it down. That's really the first step in order to trust
in yourself. Understand what you bring to the table, reread it many times and with
confidence and respectfulness. That's gonna help you out tremendously because
again it is how you believe in yourself that comes through in assertiveness. Are
you gonna trust in yourself? I'd like to hear from you in the comments below and
write, 'BELIEVE IN ME!' Express yourself in a positive way. There is a big difference
between being assertive and aggressive and let me tell you, sometimes those
lines get very blurred. Now the key to do this, to really express yourself in a
positive way, is the language that you use. The key is not to focus on other
people. So it's not, 'you need to do this' because that doesn't work. What you can
do in these situations is: 'What I see looking at the situation is perhaps we
should go down this road,' or, 'Here's an idea that I've been thinking about
listening to what you had to say and as a result may be a
good fit strategically,' but if you were to actually go the opposite and saying,
'Listen, you need to do this because it's the right thing for the company,' it has a
different tone and people will shut down and again that's the aggressive side so
be assertive and be respectful and do it in a way that is positive. Think about
the what if. Now, I'm a real big believer of not looking at the what if
because it just puts in judgment however in this situation I'm making an
exception and that exception is think about, what if you're not assertive?
Because a lot of times people become very shy or they don't feel confident in
being assertive to bring about an idea and it actually has huge impact on
the organization in a negative way if they didn't bring up their idea or worse
yet because they weren't assertive in a respectful way, didn't bring up ideas or
their point of view and now they've been dumped on and they have tons of things
that they just have to do because they didn't speak up so I want you to think
of what if I am NOT assertive in this situation, what if I don't speak up, what
are the ramifications and if they are huge from a negative standpoint it is
your duty. It is your duty and service to the organization that you're working in
to say something. Remember, just do it respectfully. Use empathy and compassion,
so a lot of times when I'm facilitating things can sometimes get heated and
people feel under attack whenever there's some disagreement of
some sort and that's sometimes why people aren't assertive. Now, if you use
empathy and you try to come from someone else's point of view and even compassion
by understanding that, hey, you know what? We're all in the same boat, we're all
just trying to do what is right for the organization and this could make a huge
difference. When I come across this in workshop, it's really important to
acknowledge people's feelings. It's really important to just not ignore it
and bulldoze your way through. So, what I do whenever I have and I have to be
assertive in a workshop to get things back on track is I say, 'Hey, you know what,
Joe? I hear what you're saying. Thank you so much for sharing. I can see that
you're passionate about it or I can see that you're upset,' whatever the scenario
or feelings may be, they're really important to acknowledge. Go, acknowledge
that and say, 'You know what, I can't deal with it now I gotta keep
us back on track but how about if you and I afterwards talk about this offline
or we can bring it to someone else's attention.' It makes a huge difference and
it really moves things forward but that empathy and compassion has a huge impact
and really important from an assertive standpoint to keep things on track,
particularly when you're in a role of facilitation, project management or
whatever it may be in order to be successful in the role that you're at.
Now that you know how to be assertive at work, enter diplomacy - you have to do it
with respect and what comes into play is mindfulness. I want you to check out my
mindfulness download, grab it from the link below. Understanding these tips and
techniques will really help you be grounded so you can be assertive at work.
If you like this video, hit the thumb button below, please share it with your colleagues and with
someone who you feel perhaps could use a little assertiveness boost. Now it's your
turn to share. Let me know how you plan to use assertiveness at work in the
comments below. See you at the next video, bye!