♪♪
[audience applause]
- [German accent] Physicists of the Copenhagen Conference,
please welcome our next speaker, Doctor Erwin Schrödinger.
[clapping]
- [Austrian accent] Thank you.
I am honored to be sharing the stage today
with such esteemed colleagues as Lise Meitner,
the discoverer of nuclear fission;
Michael Faraday, the father of electromagnetism;
Heisenberg, whose genius is not uncertain;
and of course, Albert Einstein.
[audience laughter]
Today I hope to join your ranks
with my newest discovery in quantum mechanics.
I hypothesize that only when an object is seen directly
will its state of existence be definite.
[collective gasp]
Albert: [German accent] Fascinating, Schrödinger.
Can you expound on this?
- Absolutely, Mr. Einstein.
Take this box.
Inside, unseen by us, is a cat.
All: [high-pitched] Aww!
Faraday: [English accent] A kitty!
- Yes, a kitty-- a cat: Schrödinger's cat.
And he has found his way into a box.
Meitner: [Austrian accent] Oh, typical kitty!
If there's an open box,
the kitty's going to take it over!
- Meow, meow, zat's mein box!
- Next stop, your favorite sveater!
I'm gonna get mein fur all over it.
[chuckle]
That's what my cat does.
[audience laughter]
- Okay, yes.
Yes, I can see that we all love cats,
and cats do love boxes.
But the point is,
without opening the box and looking inside,
we do not know the state of said cat.
- Probably fluffy.
- Ah, yes.
Yes, it is probably fluffy,
but the point is we can't see it.
- So it could be hairless, Mr. Faraday.
- Yes, right, we don't know.
- I don't like hairless cats.
- Fine!
It is a very fluffy cat!
Einstein: What is its name?
- I don't know!
All: [sadly] Aw.
- Pockets!
All: [joyfully] Oh!
- My cat's name is "E = MC cute."
[laughing]
I came up with the name before I came up with the theory!
- Zey are so inspirational.
- Adorable!
Speaking of, I would like to get on with my theory!
- Seriously, everyone.
Are you scientists or weird cat people?
- [girly] I know which one I am!
Meitner: Mm-hm.
- Well I am a scientist.
Dr. Schrödinger, like my principle,
this seems to be about zhe power of observation.
- Yes, Heisenberg, thank you.
- So... it is therefore possible
to see zhe cat inside of zhe box.
- Eh, no, because--
- Not even if I do dis?
Einstein: [excitedly] Oh.
- What zhe heck is that?
- Yarn for the kitty to chase!
[cheering]
Meitner: Talk about string theory.
- It's not going to chase it!
- Oh, give us a peeksey, it's a kitty!
Scientists: Please!
- Nope, no.
You cannot see the kitt-- the cat, the cat.
Because if we do, it will establish a reality.
For zhe purposes of my theory, we cannot observe the cat,
so there are a million realities.
The cat is both alive and dead.
Meitner: This story took an icky turn!
- It's not a story; it's a scientific theory!
Faraday: Uh, here's a scientific theory:
Show us the kitty, okay?
- No, it's not real.
It's a thought experiment.
You know what?
Fine!
It's a dog!
Scientists: Boo!
- Know your audience!
- We've heard enough about your dumb theory--
multiple states-- we get it, all right?
Blah, blah, blah.
Ve know there's a kitty in there.
Show us the kitty!
Scientists: [chanting] Kitty! Kitty! Kitty!
Ktty! Kitty! Kitty!
Faraday: Oh.
Heisenberg: [gasp]
Meitner: Oh...
[thumping]
[audience laughter]
- Oh no!
If we hadn't opened the box, the cat would still be alive
because ve vouldn't have observed it!
- No, it wouldn't have, Einstein.
It's a stuffed animal!
Heisenberg: [gasp]
- My cat's name is Gingerby.
[audience awws]
And she's the queen of my whole world!
- [chanting] Schrödinger! Schrödinger!
Schrödinger! Schrödinger!
Schrödinger!
[audience clapping]
[chants fading]
[boom]
[audience continues clapping]
- [German accent] Hey folks, don't forget to like...
- Share!
- ...and subscribe.
- Heck yeah!
That was great!
- Yeah!
This took us 80 takes.
Everyone is mad at us.
- It's a kitty!
I don't, heh heh.
- Back to one.
- It's 'cause we kept reaffirming.
- [chuckles]
[harpsichord chord]