Last Friday I wasn't able to be here.
Jason Sudeikis was kind enough to fill in
and guest host for me.
He did a great job but I have something
I want to talk to him about.
So hey Jason, can you come out please?
As I said, you did a great job.
Did you enjoy it?
I had a blast.
You'll do it again?
I would love to.
Good, you should do it again because I
thought you did a great job.
What did you-- would you-- yeah, you just want the day off.
No, no, I had a thing.
OK.
So-- no I had a thing.
Yeah, OK.
And I have a thing again.
So you'll do it again.
Excellent.
All right.
So when you were here as a guest,
we talked about your hair, and you
were growing it out for a role.
Yes, that was, that was like last October or so.
Right, and did the role-- did you shoot the movie already?
No, no, it got pushed.
Oh, so it's still pushed?
It's still pushed, so, yeah.
OK, my thing is, does Olivia like this?
My hair?
Exactly.
I-- I don't know.
Olivia, come here.
Olivia's here because we think it's long.
We think it's pretty-- it's getting kind of--
Just a little long.
Right, it's like as long as your wife's hair.
It's the same as my hair.
It's almost the same.
There's only room for one of these in our house.
Yeah.
I agree.
So what we did--
We were going to cut your hair.
Olivia-- my hair.
Your hair.
Because I shaved Julian Edelman's beard.
I don't know If you saw that.
And I did a great job and he loved it.
And there's not much much of a difference
between shaving and cutting.
I would disagree strongly.
Yeah.
Just-- we just head over here.
Just head over here.
Let's go.
OK, yeah.
Yep.
Yeah.
All right.
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
Look at that.
That's convenient.
Yeah.
Well, this is legit, you got the pole and everything.
Yeah, that's-- Julian Edelman sat in that chair right there.
This is the one.
Yep.
So what we're going to do, Olivia
have you ever cut hair before?
Never.
No.
No, not good with the scissors.
We want to be-- really?
No.
But I think I'm ready right now.
She burns herself with the curling iron.
I'm not good with hair.
I don't know how to do hair.
She's not going to use a curling iron on you.
And don't worry about it.
OK.
All right.
Just lift.
See your hair is so long that we can't even
get this thing on here without lifting your hair.
This is--
Do you think we should wet it?
Or do you think that we should--
I think we should wet it.
That's what they do, right?
Wait a minute, you guys should have had this kind conversation
with--
OK, all right.
OK.
You should-- they wet the hair more than the face.
Usually a lot of this that happens.
I don't know that it does need to be completely wet.
No, no, it's just-- it's just a little spritzing.
tWitch, how you doing, man?
Good, how you doing?
You all right?
I might need that hat in a minute.
There we go.
All right.
There we go.
So do you have a desired look of style?
Yeah, human.
Yeah, you tell us.
A human man.
All right.
Tell us what look you're going for?
All right.
So we'll see if our sides match.
Right, OK great.
(LAUGHING) What are you doing?
See if our sides match.
OK.
Yeah, because--
Just watch my ears.
Let me just make sure, do you part it on that side
all the time?
I don't know.
Oh!
Yeah, yeah.
That's the right response, gang.
Woo-hoo!
I appreciate that.
Oh, that's a lot of noise.
Please.
Ellen, you knew I loved you before but now this really--
This is fantastic.
Do you like the idea of the mullet?
No.
I mean, metaphorically, yes.
I think that's great.
Again, I've never done this before.
I've never done it either.
It's so fun.
I've done my dog.
I shaved my dog's hair with it.
This is the same!
Yeah, I've never been in this position either.
OK.
All right.
Who's a good boy?
[GRUNTING]
Careful, I have scissors.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, don't shake.
No, I know that.
All right.
God.
Oh.
What's your side looking like?
It's looking so, so good.
Why don't you guys swap sides, where you can just
clean up each other's work?
Oh, look!
Yours is all combed.
I just went rogue.
Oh, my gosh.
I keep hearing gasps.
I know.
But it's mainly because of what your wife is doing.
I think I'm doing a good job.
You can't see my scalp from it.
Do you want to layer it?
Look.
Yeah, do you want layers?
These guys over here are just--
look at tWitch! tWitch is stunned.
But see how long this is?
That's like a Flock of Seagulls.
It is.
That's too long.
This is what people like now, though.
But maybe that's good.
Maybe if we just leave that long.
Wait.
Don't move.
Oh.
Oh, my god!
[LAUGHS]
OK.
There.
That's good.
It's so professional.
I mean, this feels like I'm on Fear Factor now.
This is like, holy smokes.
It's perfect.
That's kind of good.
Yeah.
I feel like we're really good at this.
I actually think we should do this more often.
Yeah.
It's your plan B.
It's good.
Come on.
Y'all have to admit, that's kind of cute.
We did a good job.
That's not bad right there.
Look at that.
[APPLAUSE]
I can see why people do this.
It's like a bonsai tree.
Yeah.
I'm now your bonsai tree.
It is like a bonsai tree.
Oh, god.
This is great.
We're going to auction this off.
We auctioned off his beard.
We'll auction off your hair.
You'll probably get more for his beard than my hair.
We got, like, $8,000.
All right.
We'll be right back.
Thanks, Jason.
Absolutely.
[APPLAUSE]