- I recognized that assimilation wasn't about
losing my Indian culture
but it was actually about gaining empathy
for the culture that I was a part of
as well as the culture that I was from
and making sure that I was actually incorporating
and becoming a sum of all of my experiences
and a sum of everything that was surrounding me.
- Hey, I'm Leslie Ambriz
and welcome to Third Culture Conversations.
- I'm Manolo Lopez and this is a show about
embracing your identity.
- My name's Esteban Gast and today
we're taking assimilation
off the dictionary side for a moment.
How would you define assimilation to yourself?
- I think it's, I think there are two different ways,
it can go a negative way where you completely
adopt a new culture and dismiss your own
or it can be a way of blending both of them
in a way where you kind of create your own culture.
- I think it's more like camouflaging
or being that chameleon into something else that you're not
just to be able to pass through.
- So Manolo it sounds like you're sort of
viewing assimilation as not being true to yourself?
In like a way, right, if you can chameleon?
- In a way yeah it's just whatever you need
to get from point A to point B.
- Yeah, kind of like code switching
I feel like that goes in the same barrier, you know?
- Yeah code switching is like
when you're with one group of people
and you're totally different
than a different group of people.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, specifically like culturally.
- Yeah, which a lot of us do naturally.
You know. - Yeah.
- Do you amp up like I for sure
amp up like the Latinoness when I'm in Columbia?
- I don't, I don't think I honestly confession,
I think I'm really bad at it maybe I'm wrong.
So you guys can tell me, you know me,
I feel like I'm bad at code switching.
Like, I feel like I'm the same
even in places where I'm supposed to be
like a little more proper or professional
like I'm still the same and it gets me
in trouble sometimes
- Yeah.
- So I don't know that that might be I don't know.
I kind of see it as a good thing
but maybe sometimes it's not a good thing,
like in a job interview so... - I like that you're like
I'm rude everywhere so I don't .
- Well, I never said rude,
okay? - Oh yeah.
I never said rude.
- Lesley I am with you 'cause I'm on apologetic
about being Puerto Rican I put it in everyone's face.
If it wasn't like that
obviously there is a whole history behind it
but now I just wanna shout to the world.
- Manolo does fit into every conversation ever.
You're like pretty good weather and he's like,
you know where else has weather?
And I'm like, play with me.
- That's very, that's actually very true .
- Manolo you've never, you've never done something
and you're like, if my Puerto Rican friends
find out about this, I'm screwed.
You've never thought that?
- I guess in a way when I moved to the States
and did stuff that was,
that didn't really match to our culture
and to how we grew up
but I don't know if I can name one right now.
- You're right you can't name one.
- I wanna stay away from that question.
- Manolo you can't name one?
- I can't name one.
- He can, he can.
- He can.
- Like 20 are running through his brain right now
and he just doesn't wanna mention it to us.
- Too much, you didn't...
- Okay, okay, I'll say it, I had a man bun okay?
And that has nothing to do with like Puerto Rican culture
or the way that we cut our hair back into,
in the island so there you go,
you guys got it. - That's like
the least Puerto Rican thing. - That was
Wow, I feel like that was a cop out.
- Hey everyone, we're now joined by an incredible person
and friend Samir Chaudry.
He's an entrepreneur and creator,
he co-founded the Lacrosse Network
which got acquired by Whistle Sports.
And he is part of the wildly popular YouTube
and creator duo, Colin and Samir.
He's also one of the most thoughtful people I know
in the world of media
Samir, thanks so much for being here
and talking to all things Third Culture.
- Yeah, thanks so much for having me
I'm really excited for this.
- So give us some context.
I know high school was really formative
and you sort of grew up in a community
that is different from the community your parents grew up in
and that your culture is from,
can you tell us a little bit about how you grew up?
- Yeah, I was born and raised here in Los Angeles
and you know obviously my parents
were both brought up in India.
My dad specifically is from a very small town in India.
You know, just to give some context,
I went to go visit it
and you know
they still have an open sewage system and like the,
just the way that they were brought up
was so significantly different
from me growing up on the West side of LA
and the communities that I interacted with
were just completely different
so everything was, growing up as a you know,
as a young cool kid out here
and getting into my teenage years
it was also foreign to them
and their experience was so foreign to me.
- You know, we talked a little bit
about assimilation at the beginning of this you know,
of the show and so we wanted to know like,
how did you kind of transition your parents' culture
and this like States American culture
into who you are now while you were growing up?
- So you know, the reality is when I was a kid
like I just wanted to fit in
and I grew up going to Christian schools
and I was actually really the only person of color
in my class in you know, in elementary school
and I don't think originally I recognized
how different I was
but over time you just start to recognize
through your friends
and some of the things that they're doing
and even like what they're having for dinner
or what they're bringing for lunch.
I vividly remember bringing lunch to school one day
and it was Indian food that my mom had made
and I remember opening it
and it can obviously it had like a very different
and distinct smell and it was just totally different food.
And I remember like there just kind of
being a lot of conversation around there
and a lot of shock about like, what is that?
What are you, what's going on?
And I was so just embarrassed that I just didn't eat lunch
and I remember coming home and my mom asking me like,
why didn't you eat your lunch?
And I was just like, I just wasn't hungry.
And she kept pushing me on it
like, why didn't you eat lunch?
And I just, I didn't wanna tell her
that it was cause I was embarrassed
but that was the reality.
Like I just didn't wanna be different.
I kind of pushed aside my culture and my heritage
because it was so different.
And that was, that was a little bit different
from how my brother treated it,
he was very proud of our culture.
He liked to bring it to school
and make sure that he kind of educated people.
And I think over time that that helped me a little bit
but initially I was definitely you know,
more on the side of just trying to fit in
and just trying to be like everyone else
than I was, you know,
trying to bring my culture to school with me.
- So Samir, you're clearly a creator
and you're really good on camera.
Was this something that you always did or you grew into it?
- Funny enough I think a big part of my Indian heritage
is that kind of desire to perform and desire to storytell
like if you look at Indian culture,
it's very performative.
Like we grew up watching Bollywood movies,
which is a lot of songs and dance
and a big way that we connected as kids
and especially how my parents brought us into the culture
was through, was through dance.
From a young age, my brother and I
started dancing to Bollywood music
and we were not shy at all to perform.
And then over time we actually became like a dance troupe
and would go around and do these Indian dances
and just like, I don't even know how to describe this
but there are newspaper cuttings of us
like the Chaudry brothers going around
and dancing all over the place.
And we would find any opportunity to do this
talent shows, even just like at a friend's house,
like you know when your parents say like,
oh, come on dance, like you know.
- Show me a move.
- We've guests over.
Yeah, and my brother and I would,
you wouldn't even have to say that.
we would come downstairs if my parents had guests over
and we would just turn on a song, start dancing.
So I think from a young age,
I learned a lot about how to not only express myself
but express our culture through like song and dance.
And I think I was just conditioned
to want to be able to connect
and not only with myself, but connect with others.
Like seeing the reaction as little kids
when we would dance was so fun to know
that like we would dance, they would smile.
And from a young age
that was a really interesting experience
to recognize that you could evoke emotion
out of expression you know.
Storytelling in some respects is in my blood
just because of our heritage
but it also was just the only way
to express and to explain to people what I was experiencing.
- One that you'll talk about,
can you talk about a little bit of like
the frustration of the lack of stories of Indian Americans
when you were growing up . - True.
- And maybe the responsibility you feel now
as an Indian American storyteller.
- True
- Very publicly telling stories.
- Yeah.
- What that shift has been
or sort of how you think about that in your head?
- Yeah, when I was growing up
there wasn't that many people to look to
who looked like me
pursuing creativity especially in the U S.
I remember when I was in middle school
and going into high school,
really the only Indian on TV
that was really recognizable was a pooh on the Simpsons
and he wasn't even played by an Indian guy.
And he was kind of a caricature
of what being Indian and American makes you,
you're worked at a 7-Eleven you know,
just had this thick accent.
So a lot of people would you know,
would make jokes and kind of like interact with me
in that way.
Indian people in media were played in a way
that was always like heavy accent,
a character of what being an Indian in America was.
There was no example of what I could become
if I wanted to pursue storytelling,
if I wanted to pursue creativity.
There was not really a roadmap
and not really someone to aspire to be like.
Of course there was Bollywood actors
and there was musicians in India
but not really anyone doing that in America.
Now over time today I think we look at the landscape
and it's very different.
Indian Americans are starting
to become a lot more represented in media
and that gives you know, younger kids
an opportunity to aspire to be like someone
and so look at something and say, I don't have to,
if I wanna grow up and be in videos,
I'm gonna grow up to be on camera
I don't have to play the 7-Eleven owner.
I don't have to play someone with a thick Indian accent.
I can actually just pursue my creativity
and I'll be accepted just for whatever that is
ignore the state of my culture.
Having aspirational figures, having icons,
having people to look at and say, I would like to do that.
So I think you know, of course I'm not in Hollywood,
I'm not like a part of some big television show
but even for the small audience that we've carved out,
it's very meaningful for me that there are, you know,
even if I can impact one, two or 10 kids
who are growing with the desire to become storytellers,
filmmakers, or even just pursue something that's
you know, non nontraditional to Indian kids,
for me that that feels really special
and it's a big part of what drives me
to keep doing what I'm doing.
- So Samir, this episode is all about assimilation
and when we talked earlier,
you looked and defined assimilation really beautifully
and differently than some of us have.
Do you wanna share your perspective on that?
- I think I originally thought of assimilation
as fully immersing myself in American culture
and kind of moving on from Indian culture
'cause we weren't in India anymore.
But over time I recognized that assimilation
wasn't about losing my Indian culture
but it was actually about gaining empathy
for the culture that I was a part of
as well as the culture that I was from
and making sure that I was actually incorporating
and becoming a sum of all of my experiences
and a sum of everything that was surrounding me.
So I think instead of losing yourself
which I've heard a lot of
in the conversation around assimilation
and losing your culture,
it's all about just gaining and gaining not only culture
but gaining empathy for those who are around you
and those who came before you.
Yeah, I try and imagine what it would be like right now
at 30 years old to move to a brand new country
and have kids in that country who grow up
only knowing that they would be foreign to me
and I would be foreign to them and you know,
my expectation would not be
that they live an American life or my exact experience
in this new country.
My expectation would be that they grow up in that country
they carry some values that I brought from my experience
and some of my heritage
and then they have their own experience
and then they introduce that to our family
and I become a more open-minded person
because of that.
And I think that's what's happened in my family.
I think assimilation in my family
has meant that we've all become very open
we've all become students of you know the world
and the different places we've traveled
and the different places that we've been.
And now I think where we started
being a little bit close-minded
and being just hey, we have to protect our Indian heritage
I think now we've come to a point where it's,
we are now a sum of all of our parts
and that will continue and continue and continue.
Especially as I am gearing up for a wedding
to a to a white Jewish fiance here from Los Angeles.
So this will continue.
We're gonna incorporate her culture and her heritage
into our family and my culture and my heritage
and it will just continue to go on and on and on.
And that is the reality
of moving to the United States of America.
- Thanks for joining Third Culture Conversations
and having such a meaningful and insightful conversation
on the way that we think about assimilation
and how Samir's reflection on the sum
well the sum of all the parts of all the cultures,
that's beautiful man, thank you.
How cool is Samir?
- The coolest.
- He's so cool you just wanna hang out with him.
- I really like what he had to say about assimilation
'cause I think I've always,
I've definitely always been someone who,
like we talked about before you know,
in terms of like code switching and assimilation,
I've always viewed it as like, oh kind of like,
oh, you saw that or oh, it's pretty negative
but it was, it was actually really interesting and really,
it really opened my mind
to hear about it from a more positive standpoint.
- I think Samir's story is amazing
and I think the way that he talks about his parents
and how has his parents also evolved as he evolved
and it's something very powerful.
- Every story is valid.
Like every story that you're living, every story matters
in the way that we think about Third Culture kids
and people who come with these like
complex cultural relationships.
- Now the coin has two sides to it right?
And you're the one who decides
ultimately what story you wanna tell.
Muscle tough to Samir
and please bring back the Chaudry Brothers, we need that.
- Oh my Gosh yes. - We're ready.
- The world is ready. - We're so ready for it.
- Hey, thanks so much for watching this episode,
we'll see you next time.
- Bye.
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