*Terrible violin playing*
Mysterious voice: Hey, you.
Brett: Me?
Mysterious voice: Yes, you.
Do you wish you could sound like Ling Ling,
or a world-class soloist?
Brett: Yes, of course.
Mysterious voice: Well you can't.
*sad music*
Mysterious voice: But!
I can teach you how to look just like a world-class musician.
Brett: Really?
Hi, my name is Edgar Edwina,
and I'm a performance stage presence expert specialist.
Today i'm here to tell you that studies have shown
over 90% of audience members
have no clue what to listen out for in the classical performance.
So as long as you act confident and passionate on stage,
you're good to go.
Today i'm going to teach you 9 crucial moves to up your charisma,
*Italian chef kisses*
and stage presence.
So that,
you'll be looking good on stage.
Master them.
No. 1: Eyes closed
A powerful technique for looking like you're deeply and emotionally involved into the music.
While this move is very effective in wildly passionate or deeply introspective passages,
if applied inappropriately,
it may make you look like you're falling asleep.
Lastly, make sure to never use this technique during chamber music
for people will mistakenly believe that you are not listening.
Instead, always look at the other member as much as you can.
The more eye contact, the more the illusion of musical collaboration.
No. 2: The intense eyebrows.
This is the hallmark of the intense passionate soloist.
Often paired up with other techniques such as:
distorting the jaw, or scrunching your face.
This technique is utilized by many great violinists to great effect.
Lack the skills to create a convincing color change?
Just raise your eyebrows and intend the note,
and 95% of the audience will hear the color change.
No. 3: Flare endings
If you aren't already doing this,
you need to learn to implement it straight away
to up your performance gain 100%.
Flare end is an automatic and easy way
to add sparkle and flare to any of your phrase ends.
Anytime you have a brilliant end,
pull your bow out in a large circle, and widen that chest out.
Yes, you are flexing on the audience.
No. 4: The forte piano
Another bread-and-butter staple so good that even conductors use it.
If you lack the bow control to execute a really good forte piano,
just signal it with your body.
Simply crash down and shrink your body,
and no one will notice that you actually made a mezzoforte to mezzopiano.
Instead, they'll think you made a fortissimo to pianissimo.
And people'll admire your musicality.
In a broader sense,
feel free to use your body for all types of dynamic contrasts,
accents, crescendos, and decrescendos.
All can be conveyed purely through body language.
No. 5: Phrasing with your scroll
A more subtle and nuanced move that requires practice.
Many great soloists will draw seemingly circles,
and curved lines through the air with the scroll,
in order to signal how tastefully they are phrasing.
It's almost like they're conducting with the scroll and showing the melodic line.
Try moving around the scroll in different ways to create the illusion of shaping and sculpting the phrase.
Even if your playing is absolutely flat,
they'll have no idea.
No. 6: I'm the musical 2nd violinist
Don't be fooled into thinking that as a 2nd violinist, you can't show off.
There's nothing that screams:
"I'm in intellectual music level more than a 2nd violinist
or a violist that plays with immense body motion."
No. 7: Bend your back backwards
Do this one at your own risk.
Make sure you stretch your back regularly to avoid injury.
On a high or effective note, bend backwards.
Best paired with the flare end and/or eyebrows for maximum effect.
No. 8: Knees bent.
This is a general note on your form you should take on stage,
but you should always keep your weight on the balls of your feet
and have your knees slightly bent.
This allows for the most amount of movement and agility
so you can move around as much as possible.
almost as if you're a boxer boxing with the music on stage.
Don't worry about being excessive.
Even if you think you're moving too much,
you're probably still moving less than Joshua Bell.
No. 9: Last but not least, keep vibrating.
Being in a soft lingering note or brilliant top note,
the continuation of vibrato
shows that you're keeping the passion intensity going
even after the notes finish.
Remember it doesn't need to sound different.
It's all about creating the visual illusion
for the audience to imagine in their own mind.
Bonus.
Since I'm really generous,
I'm going to include 2 bonus moves for the more commercially success oriented music.
The first is the dancing violinist.
Add some leg hip and sexy dance moves in your playing
in order to hit optimum mainstream success.
Lastly,
if you prefer to target the older audience demographic,
dress up in an elegant tails,
invest a large amount of capital on an orchestral fancy dresses,
and a literal castle for a stage,
then you might just make more money than Justin Bieber.
Master these 9 steps
and you will be a master musician look-alike.