What's up, everyone?
Welcome back to my channel.
Now, in today's video, we're going to talk all about what exactly to do when your parents
do not support your entrepreneurial dreams.
Now, I'm totally not going to lie to you guys and tell you guys that this is a very personal
and touchy subject for me because I personally struggled with this a lot ever since quitting
my job, becoming a content creator, and now being a full-time business owner, but I do
know that this is a topic that's very prominent for most people who want to create something
and who want to jumpstart their dreams.
It's a topic that's very painful and can be very hurtful.
Even for me during my journey, it was very frustrating to convince my parents, let alone
friends and family, what I was up to, and it's very hurtful when the people that you
expect to support you the most don't support you or you don't feel like they support you
because let's be real here.
Starting a business on its own can be very scary and lonely, and to have your parents,
people that share the same blood with you not understand what you're trying to create
just is the extra cherry on top to make things even worse.
Now, I know my mom and my dad watch my videos, so hey, mom.
Hey, Dad.
Please don't take this personally.
I just want to help as many people who are going through the same thing find their way
through this difficult path or this difficult phase in their life.
Trust me, take it from me, it does pass, but in today's video, that's why I created it
is for you to understand to kind of how you can cope with this situation, so keep watching.
Now, the first piece of advice I have for you is to try to understand that they don't
understand and that they probably will never understand until you show them the results
because just know, and you're going to get the same advice when you go to any video that's
related to this topic, is that at the end of the day, your parents care about you, your
safety, and their job is to protect you.
Truth be told, they don't understand because they'll never understand your vision, where
you want to take your project, so on and so forth.
As a creator, every day from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep, you're
constantly thinking about how you're going to build this business, what you're going
to create, where you want to take it.
You yourself as the creator, you have the entire blueprint from A to Z on how exactly
you're going to do it.
Just know that your parents don't have that blueprint unless you've really broken it down
to them step-by-step, but the reality is, and if you're really being honest with yourself,
is you're probably not breaking it down in a language that they understand.
Understandably, they're not going to get it until you show them the results.
The reason why I keep saying results, results, results is because if you even look through
history, every entrepreneur has been laughed at, criticized, questioned when they were
creating their products or services.
If you look at the first person who invented the car, everyone thought he was crazy because
they couldn't fathom not riding horses.
Same with Mr. Alexander Graham Bell when he created the telephone, companies laughed in
his face and said that it was a toy.
Now, the telephone is widely used.
Now, that's all we use really, the mobile phone.
Same with Steve Jobs when he came out with the Apple Computer, people thought he was
insane until he actually finally created a brand for himself and actually is now regarded
as one of the top entrepreneurs of our time.
You have to understand that if these top entrepreneurs and inventors and creators were mocked, laughed,
and ridiculed, trust that this is the same process that you actually have to go through,
that you will inevitably go through when you are a creator and when you are in a phase
where you haven't shown your results yet.
However, instead of being the majority of the people who are going to feel discouraged
by that and then end up crying in a corner, use this motivation and use this drive to
actually work twice as hard to get the results that you need in order to get the approval
of your parents.
That's something that I have to do when I realized that there was no point in wasting
my energy of just trying to explain myself and paint this amazing picture.
I just have to put my head down and actually get to work and work extremely hard to get
the results that I needed to show to my parents, "Hey, I'm safe.
I'm okay.
I can care for myself, and this works."
Even for me, it wasn't until I exceeded my monthly income compared to what I made at
my corporate job was when the questioning finally stopped, so just trust that that's
going to happen for you, but you need to actually channel that energy into your work, into your
craft, into your vision, and actually materializing it and turning it into a real reality and
proving it to not just your parents but also your friends or anyone who's questioning your
direction that this works and that you can do it and that you're not crazy.
I think that's the best way that I could put it.
I think that when you're on this journey, people think you're absolutely insane until
you actually show them the results, and then suddenly, people ask you how you did it.
You want to work to that point where you get there, and you can finally be able to teach
people how you got from point A to point B rather than constantly being questioned of
why you are seemingly a crazy person.
However, one thing I want to add before we hop into the second piece of advice that I
have is that I get it.
It's very hard especially if you live with your parents or you constantly see your parents,
and they're just kind of like at your ear asking you and questioning you and challenging
you and criticizing you, and maybe most times, it's unintentional but as someone who is the
creator, it's very easy to get easily defensive.
What I recommend too to deal with this problem is to actually create distance.
That's something that I've had to do in my personal journey is just I put my head down,
and I just, "Yep, okay.
Got it.
Yep, thank you.
Mm-hmm.
Bye."
That's kind of the attitude that I had while I was in this phase where I was still trying
to build something.
I am still trying to build something, but in the beginning stages when you're pre-revenue,
you haven't made any money on your business yet, that's when you really have to be very
protective of your idea.
Something that I have to do is I didn't tell a lot of people about what I was working on
because I didn't want to be open to negative energy feeding into my energy because when
you are working on something, you got to keep your energy levels high.
You want to be positive.
You want to be someone who's constantly looking forward, constantly innovating, and it's not
helpful when you're putting yourself in situations to allow people to nitpick at your idea when
you haven't even finished it.
That's something that I've had to do, is really create that distance not just with parents
but also with friends, co-workers, ex-coworkers, whatever.
Be very protective of your idea and work until you materialize it, and only trust the people
that you want to trust to help you build this vision.
For me, it was hiring a business coach and having select friends where I bounce ideas
off of.
I wouldn't tell the whole world what I was working on because I didn't want to sub-sect.
No, I didn't want to ... I don't know what the word is but I didn't want to put myself
in a position where negative energy can get into my space, so keep that in mind before
we move on to the next advice.
Now, the second piece of advice that I have is a little bit controversial or maybe very
controversial, but that is, is that if you want to be rich, don't listen to your parents
unless your parents are super-duper successful, and you aspire to be exactly like them because
let me ask you a question and try to answer it as honestly as you can.
How many of you want to surpass your parents' success?
I guarantee that many of us actually want that, and we aspire to do that either consciously
or subconsciously.
It's always nice to go back to your parents and tell them, "Hey, I was able to make something
of myself, and I was actually able to do more than you could.
I hope you're proud of me," I think it's very, very forgiving to want that in your life.
However, what I learned from Matt from the Engineer Truth ... I'll link a video right
here.
It's called Rich Friends, Poor Friends where I learned this, is that wealthy people don't
follow their parents' advice.
Instead, they follow the advice of people that are more successful than their parents
or the people that they actually want to become because think about it.
If you follow your parents' advice to the T 100%, then most likely, you're going to
end up either exactly like your parents or just a little bit better.
Again, it goes back to taking advice from the people that you actually want to become.
If your dad is an accountant or has worked corporate all his life and you follow his
advice to the T, then guess what?
You're going to end up being an accountant or working corporate all your life as well.
Rather, if you want to be a successful entrepreneur or an entrepreneur in general, then follow
the advice of entrepreneurs, of people who have actually done it.
Don't follow your parents who have only worked in corporate jobs all their lives if you want
to be an entrepreneur.
It just doesn't make sense because take it from me.
If I had followed my parents' advice to the T, I probably would not be in front of this
camera, I would have given up on my dream of becoming a business coach, I would not
be making the money that I'm making now, which is way more than I did when I was working
in corporate so far, and I would probably still be at another corporate job.
Keep that in mind because for me, when I heard this piece of advice, I felt so much better
and I felt way less guilty of ignoring what my parents were trying to tell me.
Of course, at the end of the day, you want to have respect for your parents.
It's really important, but you also want to have respect for what you're trying to build.
Don't take bad advice.
Don't take advice from people who haven't done it before.
Instead, again, hire a business mentor.
Hire someone or surround yourself with people who understand because that's going to make
the biggest difference in how you feel about the project that you're trying to build.
Now, this leads me to my last and third piece of advice, which is surround yourself with
people who get it.
This is absolutely crucial especially when you do feel like you have parents that don't
fully 100% support.
If you have this area of your life that's lacking, instead of letting it be that way,
you have the responsibility not just for your mental health but also for your happiness
to fill that area back up with people who actually understand you and can support you.
This can be in the form of Facebook groups.
I have a Facebook group called The Fearless Boss Network, and that's the intention of
the group, is to support people who are trying to build their dreams.
If you'd like to join it, I'll link it somewhere here or in the comment section below.
This could be joining meetups.
This could be hiring a business mentor.
I've said this so many times.
This is what's really helped me.
This could be very selective in choosing key friends that are in a similar path to you
and actually brainstorming and creating a mastermind.
These are things that can really help your journey become so much more fun, so much better,
and so much more positive.
This journey of building something, yes, it's rough.
Yes, it's tough, but it doesn't always have to be this way, so make a conscious effort
of actually surrounding yourself with people who understand what you're going through.
Anyways, guys, you've reached the end of this short video.
I just really want to kind of share with you guys the three things that have helped me
the most.
I know that there's a lot of videos out there or a lot of resources out there.
Definitely tap into them.
The way that I handled it might not be the best way or it might not be the only way,
but it's what's helped me, so again, I'm really thankful to have you guys as my viewers.
I really hope that you enjoyed this video.
Yeah, if you'd like more resources from me, then definitely check out my website at www.vanessalau.co
and yeah.
Anyways guys, I hope you guys have a great day.
Hope you guys have a great week, and I hope you guys have a great life.
I'll see you in the next video.
Bye guys.