Tilda Swinton’s unique and androgenous looks have given her the label of “Hollywood’s
Most Intoxicating Weirdo”.
The actress who admitted that she tried to kill her baby brother, has a knack for playing
the most villainous roles amongst other interesting characters in film, from the devious White
Witch in Narnia, to the all knowledgeable Ancient One
in Dr. Strange.
But what you might not know is that it’s not just her looks that are unconventional,
but her relationships too.
The actress was rumoured to have an open relationship with the father of her children, and her boyfriend.
While that might not strike you as odd, they all seem to live very happily under the SAME
ROOF.
To add to her very complicated love life, Swinton shocked fans by coming out as “queer”
at almost 60-years-old.
Buckle your seats Juicers, cause what we’re about to tell you today, will have you thinking
about relationships in a completely different way.
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The actress met artist and playwright John Byrne back in the eighties, and the two fell
in love.
It wasn't long after that their relationship brought a set of twins into the world.
Although the actress kept much of their personal life private, their long-lasting relationship
left many wondering whether they had secretly married and were now building a family together.
But when the two broke up, it was clear that they had never tied the knot and just happened
to have what many considered a strange relationship.
Tilda was spotted with another man who was nineteen years younger than she is.
Soon it was confirmed that Swinton was dating German-born artist Sandro Kopp .
The news left fans shocked as it seemed as though the actress was having an affair with
Kopp.
Tilda was away from her family filming The Chronicles of Narnia when she and Sandro began
seeing each other.
The pair may have found love but it came at the cost of someone else’s heartbreak.
Sandro’s then-girlfriend of four years, Emma Williamson, revealed that the artist
brutally broke up with her via email from the Narnia set, after being mesmerised from
meeting Tilda.
"It was awful.
I was on my knees on the banks of the Nile, sobbing, with my sister holding me.
At least he could have ended it with me, even on the phone, before he cheated with her."
Sandro’s ex said, adding that he begged her not to tell anyone as he desperately wanted
to protect Tilda’s children and career from such a scandal.
So what about Tilda’s long life partner, John?
How did he cope with the news?
It turns out he took it pretty well.
Just moments into dating, it was revealed that Tilda's new boyfriend had moved into
the family home that she shared with John, father of her children.
This isn’t something you hear everyday, and Tilda’s reaction to the whole situation
left even more jaws hanging.
"We are all a family," she has said.
"What you must also know is that we are all very happy."
People couldn’t help but wonder what was happening behind closed doors, was the actress
in an open relationship?
Why was she eager to cohabitate with the father of her children AND another man?
As awkward as it may have been, it was necessary for them to share the same home.
She and John were co-parenting, and had their children to think of.
This arrangement also came in handy when the actress travelled with Kopp for her career
as John would stay home with the kids.
One can only imagine how the children felt in that type of situation.
Did they have to call Sandro dad too?
Whatever the kid’s thoughts, their mother did what she thought was best for them.
Since having to make such changes and adjustments for her kids, the actress discovered that
there is a lot that she has to sacrifice for her children.
And time is one of those things, even if it meant living out the most uncomfortable double
date scenario.
Swinton grew up in boarding schools and recalled it being one of the worst experiences of her
life, and it's for that reason that she is not a Harry Potter fan.
The boarding school experience and harsh bullying, which the actress says movies like that romanticize,
left her scarred for years.
The torment and loneliness that formed from being away from her family broke something
inside her which caused her not to speak for almost five years when she was younger.
"I think they are a very cruel setting in which to grow up and I don't feel children
benefit from that type of education.
Children need their parents and the love parents can provide."
So if she has to withstand smooching her boyfriend in front of her ex lover just so her children
have both their parents around, then so be it.
It’s pretty clear that three is not a crowd in this family…
Fans can’t help but wonder, where do they draw the line?
Just as Tilda had Sandro, John later found love with a lighting director who also joined
the family.
"We have not hidden away and Jeanine is very much part of my life.
Tilda knows all about it and is more than happy with the situation."
John shared about his new relationship.
It seems the only people who were rattled by Swinton's living situation at the time
was the public.
However, those close to the pair had been filled in on the arrangement.
John shared that his new lover had not only met his own family but Swinton and her lover
too.
"I wouldn't say we all socialised together but she has met Sandro and we have all been
under one roof together", he revealed.
"I know some people will struggle to understand it, but it works for us."
So, does that mean she would sleep over too?
John has since moved out of their cohabiting household, so we’ll never know, but he is
still a frequent visitor.
Swinton shared that she never thought it was taboo for him to be around and still stands
by it.
When reporters tried to press the actress about her relationship, concluding that her
previous living arrangement was an open marriage, she quickly debunked the rumours.
"I don't have a husband, I've never been married," She told reporters.
"I have children with someone else, with whom I'm bringing up my children, and I've lived
with someone else, my sweetheart for the last three years, and maybe it's extraordinary
that we're really all friends."
She added that life does not have to be complicated, and people tend to complicate things that
could be so simple—urging people to be compassionate and to not be hard on themselves when things
do get complicated.
So it was no wonder when the actress came out as queer now at sixty years old without
the worry of it complicating her life or relationship.
The actress revealed in an interview with British Vogue that though she may be well
on her way to her senior years, this was not a new discovery for Swinton.
"I'm very clear that queer is actually, for me anyway, to do with sensibility.
I always felt I was queer – I was just looking for my queer circus, and I found it.
And having found it, it's my world."
And it seems like the whole world knew it too.
After Swinton's coming out news made headlines, many took to Twitter to express their reaction
- with most saying that the news was "unsurprising".
Her androgynous looks and non-conforming lifestyle led many to believe that the actress was just
private about her identity.
Nonetheless, fans were still over the moon for the actress.
One user joked that it's "Incredibly problematic of Tilda Swinton to come out as queer without
also personally proposing to me".
Swinton may not be married, but she does have a lifelong partner who was probably just as
unsurprised by the news.
The only thing the couple has had to overcome is the criticism they received over the past
years for their nineteen-year age gap.
They have been going strong for the past seventeen years, and it doesn't seem like Swinton's
identity is going to change that.
The actress shared that since coming out, she has found other creatives, the likes of
Wes Anderson and Bong Joon- Ho, that have formed as part of her family.
Swinton was never one to be put into a box.
Her life is a testament to her peculiar nature.
An article even considered the actress "Hollywood's Most Intoxicating Weirdo" because she lives
her life boldly and is unapologetic about it.
In fact, the only box the actress has ever been in was one that she voluntarily put herself
in.
Back in the nineties, Tilda who also expressed herself as a model and performance artist
hosted an exhibition where she slept in a glass box in a London museum the entire night.
The performance piece was just made up of her sleeping on a white mattress, which the
audience glared at through the through glass walls.
Yes, Swinton is that alternatively cool kid who turned publicly dozing off into an art.
Who wouldn’t pay to see that?
From taking a nap in front of strangers to confessing that she contemplated murdering
her own brother, Tilda is not one to go with the crowd.
One of the strangest things Swinton ever admitted in an interview was a memory she recalled
of wanting to end her baby brother's life.
At just four years old, the actress was frustrated with the sibling rivalry that forms when there
is a newborn.
But instead of the malicious intent the actress had, after a turn of events, she was praised
for being her brother's hero.
"I remembered when I was four or five, I tried to kill my own brother," she said in the interview.
"I went into his room to kill him, saw some ribbons from a bonnet going into his mouth,
and began to pull them out.
And I was discovered saving his life.
So I had this strange reputation - my brother's savior - and no one knew I wanted to kill
him."
Now we understand how she lands those villainous roles.
It was in her all along.
Tilda Swinton does not live her life through a textbook.
The actress creates her own reality, which she is very much content and happy in.
She may be scrutinized for her lifestyle and choices, but it's better to embrace who you
are than pretend to be someone else for the sake of what others will think.
If anything, Swinton's peculiar nature is encouragement for everyone out there to just
be themselves.