- I see a sad confused clown.
Like a Lisa Frank clown.
(rock guitar)
- Today we're gonna be taking it back old school.
- I'm going to recreate my atrocious high school look.
Being an emo was like a form of expression for me
since I was really shy and depressed and lonely,
I just figured I might as well look
the way I felt on the inside.
(laughter)
So just look really dark and scary.
- Freshman year and sophomore year of high school
I was into weird colorful makeup and the big hair
and, I don't even know what scene is to this day.
I was following a trend.
- I definitely hung out with multiple types of groups,
like I hung out with the jocks,
I hung out with the preps.
People who, like the band, the drama.
I never really associated myself with one
specific group.
- The group that I hung out with in high school,
the first year I didn't really fit in with them,
so I was, like, sad all the time and kinda by myself.
But when I transferred high schools,
that group, that was just a group of fun really
awesome people who were super into dancing and Bollywood.
- The very eyelash primer I had in high school.
- This is the eye shadow. We'll only be using the black one.
- I struggled a little bit with acne,
so foundation was a crucial part.
- This is the pencil, also black.
- Now, I hadn't yet figured out that there was
an inside crease to put a different color in,
so it would literally just be two colors.
- I only put the foundation around my eyes
and around my lips.
- Girl, sailor mercury was mine.
That was like my Myspace URL.
- I never make it bold 'cause I feel like it
looks really harsh,
but back then I used to make this little square
in the front.
- Now that I'm doing this again,
I just realized how dumb this is.
(laughter)
- I would start way back here.
This is not even a joke.
- It looks like a caterpillar.
- The eyeliner's basically just to line out
the raccoon eyes.
- It's nice again to see how far I've come.
- I feel like I'm looking in a mirror that
I just wanna, like, punch.
- As you can see, I'm blind out of my right eye.
I may trip over some objects.
- I don't wanna leave this chair.
I don't wanna go outside into the real world
because I don't know what will happen.
- A lot of my time in high school was spent shopping
for makeup,
so I'm gonna go to Sephora and see how this
experience goes.
I got compliments on everything but my makeup.
- These eyelashes definitely block the sun.
They're like little umbrellas for my eyes.
- I think your eyelashes are, like, way bigger
than they were yesterday.
- I kept getting so many double takes,
and I had to explain myself.
I was like, "This isn't who I look like
every day, don't worry."
- Coworkers are looking at me.
(laughter)
It actually went surprisingly well.
There were a couple laughs,
but everyone else kinda really liked this
colorful look.
- Do I look emo?
Nobody was scared.
They were all pretty good.
Like a lot of people were like,
"Oh my God I love it."
But when I walked into the bathroom and looked at
my face in the mirror,
I was like, "Ach!"
Do you like my makeup?
- Yes.
- It kinda looks like my Hot Topic dream.
- I think that I like looking back at pictures
of myself when I was younger
and saying, like, "Oh I really did change."
- I did learn how to be bold and really embrace
my inner happiness.
- I'm just glad that I'm not afraid anymore.
I feel like I was hiding behind all this makeup.
- I can look at this makeup today and be like,
"Oh my God, that looks ridiculously ugly."
People back then really did compliment me
on my makeup and really encouraged me more to like,
"Oh, you should try to pursue becoming a makeup artist."
That really gave me the push to really pursue a passion.
- Be proud of who you are and represent it
in your look on your face.
- Remember that makeup is to enhance your beauty.
You are already beautiful the way you are.