adesh
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where is he we're safe just drink a
scarab just like in the Halloween spirit
if at all not a good idea around the
Secret Service are you ok I'm fine
a florist that's started out hi welcome
to another edition of between two ferns
I'm your your host Zach Galifianakis and
my guest today is Hillary Clinton thank
you very much mrs. Clinton for being
here critics have questions some of your
decision-making recently and by you
doing this show I hope it finally lays
that to rest oh I think it it absolutely
proves their case don't you are you
excited to be the first girl president
well I mean being president would be
such an extraordinary honor and
responsibility but being the first woman
elected president and what that would
mean for our country and particularly
what that would mean for you know not
just little girls little boys too that
that's pretty special
mm-hmm not to take away from the
historic significance of you perhaps
becoming the first female president but
for a younger younger generation you
will also become their first white
president and that's pretty neat too as
Secretary how many words per minute
could you type and how does President
Obama like his coffee like himself week
you know exact O's are really out of
date questions I you need to get out
more what happens if you become pregnant
are we gonna be stuck with Tim Kaine for
nine months how does this work I could
send you some pamphlets that might help
you understand first you supported
Obama's trans-pacific partnership deal
and then you are against it I think that
people deserve to know are you down with
TPP I'm not down with TPP no you're
supposed to say yeah you know me like
the hip hop group don't tell me what to
say fine lose country goes this
let's talk about Trump oh that's when
you see how well it works for Donald
Trump do you ever think to yourself oh
maybe I should be more racist when he's
elected president and Kid Rock becomes
Secretary of State are you gonna move to
Canada or one of the arctic's I would
stay in the United States and what would
you try to try to prevent him from
destroying the United States so you're
gonna lead the civil war no I wouldn't I
wouldn't take up arms I think that might
be a little extreme all right because
you were saying before we were rolling
that you wanted to take away everyone's
guns very cool cool cool cool
I really regret doing this any regrets
over losing the Scott Baio vote not a
one
so it wasn't heartbreaking that no yeah
but chachi I mean who's gonna be next
Max Headroom I'd love to meet the person
who makes your pants suits oh really
yeah because for Halloween I wanted to
go as a librarian from outer space I
think there would be a good look on you
have you thought about what you're gonna
be wearing at the debates you know
there's this thing called the double
standard and so I think about well what
should the first woman nominee of one of
our two major parties wear to the debate
and I have no idea so if you've got
suggestions I'm open to them do you
wonder what your opponent might be
wearing I mean do I I assume you'll wear
you know that red power tie or maybe
like a white power tie
that's even more appropriate when he
went to Donald Trump's wedding did he
write his own vows and did a Michelle
Obama write milania's I really couldn't
see or hear very well so I'm not quite
sure what his vows were but I'm sure
they were great and huge and wonderful
like his bowels Chelsea your daughter
and Ivanka Trump Trump's daughter our
friends does Ivanka ever call Chelsea
you know to talk about boys that might
have crushes on her like her dad I don't
think so
what's gonna be the number-one focus of
your presidency Oh exact it has to be
the economy we need more good jobs with
rising incomes we gotta make the economy
work for everybody not just those who do
top we need to take a break we just need
to have a word from our sponsor
Washington is broken the truth is too
many politicians are totally controlled
by special interests and lobbyists we're
going to make America great again
I'm Donald Trump and I approve this
message he approves the message what why
would you play a commercial for my
opponent in the middle of our interview
he paid me in steaks I'd be afraid to
eat them if I were you it's a good cut
of meat I think it's part of the
well this has been a lot of fun mrs.
Clinton we should stay in touch what's
the best way to reach you email
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