imagine that you're chasing a butterfly and as you try to chase it it keeps
fluttering around but if you were to just relax you might find that the
butterfly perches itself right on your shoulder welcome back to another video
my name is Erin I hope people expand their consciousness in this video I'm
gonna be sharing with you the three things to do instead of chasing love or
relationships this is a video series that I've been doing on stop chasing and
what to do instead I thought I'd do a whole video on three things you can
practically do instead of chasing that make and have them actually chase you
this changes the energy dynamic and helps it so that then the cards work in
your favor now when it comes to this process that's first off let's get right
into it the first part of this process of when we're chasing when we're chasing
we are implying that the other person is running so what if the only reason
they're chasing us or we're chasing them is because we believe that they're
running we believe that they're in a way trying to get away what if we switched
the frame in our mind and instead of signing us as chasing them instead of
seeing it as like you you want something from someone else what if you were to
switch up the frame now that's why the first thing that I recommend you do you
actually do to stop chasing to have them chase you is to completely let go of the
outcome let go of outcome because when you are attached to the outcome they can
feel that they can energetically feel that if if you're I really really hope
and please do this and it's almost like in a way when you're around them what
you then do is you then put it on a pedestal and when you're around them you
then start to feel more and more resistance because you're hoping in your
mind oh I hope this goes this way I hope it goes that way and they can feel that
and when they feel that they then feel the resistance and they don't know that
resistance is from you or from they just feel it people feel what you
feel and when you're attached to the outcome and trying to control it what
ends up happening is there's resistance involved so then it becomes something
that is contagious and actually holds them back from finding you attractive
now in my own life I felt this - anytime I have been in even just beyond just
chasing love or relationships if it was me trying intending to attract something
in my life the more I try to control it the more resistance I make and it's
almost like the more rules I have about it the more that gets reflected back to
me in reality if I'm like oh I really hope this person shows up on time and
I'm like thinking about it thinking about it thinking about it it normally
will end up to where maybe that person is late this is just a small example but
in the same way if I just let go of it many times I'll let go of it and then
I'll get the text that's like oh I'm almost there or I'll let go of it and
then energetically it's like then reality can reflect that back of what we
want but the key to this process understand letting go of outcome when
you let go of outcome it changes I shared in my other videos on stop chase
you know I'm going to link that below as well on the stop chasing love and
relationships video I talked about how one of my first girlfriends when I was
in high school I really liked that I really put on a pedestal and I was
things were going well and then she kind of started it withdrawal for me but then
what I did is I just completely let go and I started to have fun so the caveat
to letting go the outcome is focus on fun and I know it sounds like something
you might not want to do if you're really really heady about somebody but
I'll tell you what will you start having fun it changes your state they feel what
you feel and in this weird way think about it like this you have an energetic
field around your body and when people think of you they feel what's in your
energetic field when you think of them you're sending them energy even
subconsciously now if you're always feeling needy of the outcome they're
gonna feel that off of you when you start to let go and have fun
that's what lets start to feel it I mean what I explained in the other video
as I had an ex-girlfriend who I who I really liked noise wanted to talk to and
she wasn't I was into her more than she was into me and when it ended up
happening is I eventually was just starting to get more friends in high
school because I came out of the whole step ex stepmom situation where my
brother and I had no freedom and then I start becoming friends with other groups
and then there was this one group of friends I started have a lot of fun with
and then I started to almost forget about her I was like okay I don't I
don't need this and I saw she wasn't even treating me the way that I believe
that deserves so what happened is all the sudden she's calling me and for two
weeks straight she's like telling me she wants me back and all of this stuff and
I've already moved on to a new friend group and there was a girl within that
friend group that I was also talking to so it was like I phased it out but when
I let go of outcome she felt that and then I was also having fun and I was no
longer needy or trying to desperately control the outcome so this is the
important part of the process that really changes a lot and it's not the
thing you want to hear but if you let go of it and you focus on having fun focus
on being with your friends focus on yourself you'll find that then what
happens is your increased state of being happens and then they could feel that on
you and it ends up working in your favor now the second thing to do instead of
chasing love in relationships is looking at your self-image this is some of the
most powerful work you can do now let me use this example real quick
imagine that you see yourself on a scale of 1 to 10 this is gonna sound
superficial but imagine you see yourself on a scale of 1 to 10 as like a 5 and
imagine that this person you want you're chasing this person you want to be with
you view them in your mind as like a 9 or a 10 9.5 let's say that well because
your self-image is a 5 and they are nine and a half they're going to feel that
you believe they are way better than you are energetically vibrationally now the
key to this isn't to see you as a 10 in them as a 5 the key is to get rid of
this whole idea of having a self-image that is less than them and realized that
everyone everyone is connected and is on the same playing field so what is
your self-image if you view yourself as a 5 out of 10
then other people will feel that you view yourself as not so worthy so the
key to this as well is realizing when you aren't trying to chase someone you
should or can become the most attractive version of you and when you do that you
will have a certain self-image that has a certain level of power I believe that
a lot of times when you're doing what you love this really helps as well so
for this the key is imagining what this is this is gonna be an analogy but this
isn't what it looks like I'm trying to say what if you became the kind of
person that that person would be attracted to okay it's not what you
think but think about that developing the qualities the kind of personality
that the other person would be attracted to the person you're chasing because
that's what they're attracted to as most people are just trying to are trying to
then a lot of times people are trying to be the way they they think this person
wants them to be that's actually not the key because then that shows that you're
always within their frame of reality the key to this is becoming the star of your
own movie and developing your own gravity and stop trying to be the cameo
in anyone else's movie there's a saying that if you treat someone like a
celebrity they'll treat you like a fan think of the energy exchange there oh I
hope that you really like me I'm doing everything you really want me to do and
then they'll treat you like you're yours they're servant or something like that
but if you have your own gravity that's what's attractive I'll tell you
now when I say to stop what it seems when I say that what I'm really telling
you to do is that you will become the most attractive version of you when you
are just being yourself not trying to conform to this person - you're chasing
x' idea not trying to conform to anyone else's idea be yourself and I know it
sounds cliche but when you develop your own gravity whatever that is if you eat
a certain type of food that you love if you like certain type of music and
your word people will judge you just own it people respect people that are just
being themselves unapologetically that's the most attractive thing and if you
want this person who trying to chase to be attracted to develop your own gravity
in bu because you choose to be you not because it'll get them on your team or
start to like you but the key to this is linking up your self-image and
understanding that the more you do that the more things really begin to change
for you now the final part is a very important part of this process is what a
lot of people don't think of what is looks like a telephone what is your
story about relationships this is the thing
that you really want to focus on what is your story about relationships everyone
has a story maybe your story is that I always end up chasing people all the
good ones are taken I'm this age I'm I'm this age I know
some people that some girls that I went to high school with or certain age right
now they can there's this pressure for them to get married and have kids
because they feel like their time is running out what is your story because
the story is gonna dictate how you feel and if your story is that you're trying
to conform to someone else and even you might even have a story that you're
chasing someone else you want to be in someone else's life that you want to be
the Cameo in their movie but what if you were to change the story what if you
were to change the character that you're portraying is right now your you might
you might be portraying a character that's chasing someone else for love and
relationships that characters not really you that's something that you thought
you had to be in order to be loved one of the most common the most common
limiting belief in the world is that people believe they are not enough
people believe they're not worthy and the story we tell ourselves about
relationships and how we relate to other people will have a very strong
indication of how people respond to us so the first step to this process
number three is become aware of your story when you become aware of your
story that's when you can actually change it and can you change the
character in your story the character you are
because if you're chasing someone else then most likely you're not embodying
the 100% real you and that begins with you choosing to be you develop your own
gravity and owning it just own who you are realize you are a catch you're
somebody that somebody out there is going to love to be with and if you
would embody that energy you would be so attractive that it would just have
people wanting to be around you it would have people wanting to talk to you and
it has to do with your story around relationships there's this one girl I've
told this story and the other one as well so it might be repetitive but
there's this girl I used to work with at Nordstrom's and she told me that anytime
she got into relationship when she was in a relationship or start to date
someone she would then get hit on by like eight dudes in a week she never got
hit on other than that because she was then feeling that self love it's almost
like she had some in her life and she felt loved she felt appreciated she felt
attractive because the rules in her mind said that once she had someone in her
life she could then feel that way and then other people could feel off her
energy and then they would be attracted to her and they would hit on her eight
times in a week when normally would happen eight times in a year why is that
because the energy changed she may also have a story that once that happens then
she can feel that self-love so what is your story about when you could feel
worthy what is your story about when you can love yourself I'll tell you right
now that when you stop chasing love relationships when you stop chasing it
like that butterfly analogy you might find that then it just comes and perches
itself right on your shoulder because you've relaxed relax have fun understand
that this process is easier than you think when you begin to apply it now
there's a attractive playlist I'm going to put right here that will help why are
you for seeing this in a completely different way this will help why're you
also there's an attract love meditation that's in there that I'll link below so
many people say that they've attracted love into their life because of
listening to that meditation read the comments see what's possible that'll be
linked below either I hope you enjoyed this video peace push
love and home state