Coach.
Coach, can you tell us what went through your mind
when your daughter said, daddy makes
breakfast better than you?
Yeah.
Initially, I felt like saying, screw you and your daddy.
But plays like that rarely work the way you want them to.
So I went with, if you don't like the yogurt,
would you like some cereal?
Classic switch out.
Yeah.
It's not a strong position, and she only
got more aggressive from there.
Did she ever go for the cereal?
No, she threw the yogurt.
And I slipped on it in my flip-flops.
I bruised my hip and my pride.
It's not a great start, but we'll come back.
Coach.
Did you ever make it to soccer?
Oh, God, no.
But there were a few episodes of Paw Patrol that
allowed for the yogurt cleanup and avoided the sugar
rush after the candy bar-- the protein bar.
And like I said, it's the little wins.
Thank you, coach.
To all mom's out there, you're doing it right.
Hi, I'm Kristen Bell.
Parenting is a lot like sports.
You're either winning or losing every minute of the day.
Mostly losing, but that's what makes the winning so
sweet and fleeting.
Being a parent is just weird.
And it helps to you're not alone.
I suggest talking to someone, even if no one is there.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Well, my kids sneak things into the cart.
I just wait till they're not looking to put it back.
Sorry, grocery store employees.
The chocolate milk is next to the frozen pizzas.
Sometimes, when Siri tells me she has an alternate route,
I decline.
I'm not in any rush to end this ride.
Sometimes, when my kids ask me to stay in their bedroom,
I tell them, just lay there for a little bit
and I'll come right back.
I mean, I do, but after they're asleep.
When my kids ask to play "Some Things Never Change"
for the gazillion of time, I wish some things would change.
I'm sorry, K. Bell.
This is my truth.
Can I call you "K. Bell?"
Is that "Ms. Bell?"
No, you're not a teacher.
Oh, my God.
You're right there.
Hi, guys.
Hi.
I would like to introduce two of my favorite dads, Kevin
and Evan, creators of Dumb Dad Pod.
Welcome.
Thanks for having us.
Hello.
I feel like we share a lot of the same ideas and perspectives
about children.
It's a mess.
It's a mess, right?
It's a filthy, fu-[BLEEP] mess.
Yeah.
How did you come up with Dumb Dad Pod?
Well, like every great idea that we've ever had--
Our wives told us to do it.
Our wives told us.
We had to do it.
OK.
So it really started because our wives did notice
that there's not a lot of platforms out there for dads.
Yeah.
There's a lot of mom podcasts and mom
groups and all that stuff.
Too many.
[LAUGHS]
We're trying to whittle them out.
Yeah.
It was ultimately like an inside joke
that started because of all the dads
we've watched on television when we were kids.
Keep them at an arm's length.
Yeah.
He can't do anything right, even when he has one assignment.
I bet you guys do a lot of things
right, despite how much you make fun of it.
How often do you say--
do you have to psych yourself up and go, I can do this?
I do it pretty regularly.
I think I can do this.
But then, I usually find a pair of underwear
with a surprise in it just somewhere in the house.
Yeah, sure.
I'm like, OK, I'm not doing it.
One of mine woke up in like a mood this morning,
and I was not prepared for it.
It's really pivot fatigue before that term was even invented,
right?
Right.
Yeah, we wonder about that, because you're like,
what are you mad at?
What do you have anything going on up there?
Honest to God.
What are you stressed about?
You have all your favorite cereals.
I don't understand.
You know what, though, I did read that every time they're
angry, their brain is going through a development.
So every time they're yelling at me or screaming
or like nothing's right, I'm like,
you're going to have a new skill tomorrow.
I bet you'll be able to use the scissors.
You may have a horrible morning, but you're growing right now.
Right, you're growing.
I know tomorrow, you're going to be able to hold that pen
or something.
Just try to keep it positive.
It's a lot of developing lately.
Hey, come on, not in your hair.
The other day, my son and I were having a dance party.
And he goes, hey, you're horrible at dancing.
You should stop.
Well, he feel safe enough to share that with you.
I was making a LEGO tower with my daughter.
And she said, mine is better than yours.
I mean, it wasn't.
I told her, let's just enjoy playing together.
And she said, why start now?
Witty.
Yeah.
Yeah, anyway, I told my son.
You shouldn't really judge people.
I'm just trying to dance like nobody's watching.
And he goes, oh, that's interesting
coming from somebody who cooks like no one's tasting.
Yeah, my kids don't eat either.
Take that out of your mouth.
Hey, what did you say to your son about the cooking?
Well, I was going to say, why don't you learn how to cook?
I didn't really figure it out, but he interrupted me.
And he was like, fu-[BLEEP].
And it was like, [BLEEP].
He's talking so good now.
Yeah.
What do you think is the worst thing
for talking parenting fails that you've ever done as a dad is?
So many the pick from.
I remember when I was leaving the zoo with my daughter.
Getting up to the highway, my daughter
is like, daddy, daddy, daddy, doing that thing where they
just keep calling your name.
So annoying.
So I'm like, can you hold on?
I'm trying to get on a highway.
It's going to be fast and dangerous.
Can you wait till I'm on there?
And then, we can talk about.
Just wait.
And then, I get on the highway.
And I was like, OK, we're now on the highway.
What is it?
She's like, my seatbelt is not on.
Which I was like, why didn't you tell me
this before we got on the highway?
She was like, I did.
You think she did.
She should have been yelling.
She definitely did.
I decided with my wife, we have a six-week old son,
let's take him on a road trip.
Fun, easy, great idea.
Great idea.
Fast forward to being stuck in the middle of a drive-thru,
I'm sitting in the back with my son.
He's throwing up into my hands while
simultaneously going diarrhea.
Yeah.
And it was like 100 degrees outside.
It's both ends.
Yeah, all while still having to wait for your food.
Yeah.
By the end of that, you're so hungry.
It's like, oh, thank, God.
I got this sloppy burger.
Everything is great.
We're fine.
You can charge my card, but just keep it.
We'll be right back after a word from our sponsor.
LOL Surprise Movie Magic Studios where you can be the director.
Mom, I'm bored.
Honey, only boring people are boring.
Is that why you stare at your phone all day?
What do you want?
LOL Surprise Movie Magic Studios.
All right, all right, you can have one.
But only if I can be played by that doll.
Don't be ridiculous.
That one's you.
What the--
Cut!
Great job, everyone.
What would you say your proudest moment as a dad is?
I had one night where bedtime was not going very well.
She was running around the house,
thinking it's a fun game.
So eventually, I said, do I need to pick you up and carry you
to bed?
Is that what needs to happen?
And she said, no, daddy.
You can't pick me up because it's my body
and I can choose what I do with it.
I both love and hate that story.
Yeah, because it's a backfire.
It was proud and checkmate.
Yeah.
Oh, wow.
She's been up for a year.
We have one that is pretty funny.
She feels like the perfect hybrid between Chris Farley
and Shirley Temple.
And so she gets away with everything.
She brought this toy into bed two nights ago.
And I was like, put the toy away.
And my husband looks up.
He's like, mommy, I got this.
He's like, I'm going to give you 30 more seconds, OK?
And she goes, OK.
And then, he looks at her.
And he goes, don't make a fool out of me.
And she looks at him.
She goes, daddy, I won't make a fool out of you.
I'm going to make you a star.
What?
He didn't sleep that night.
We laughed about it for a while.
And then, we were like, is she wittier than us?
And then, there's like a jealousy component.
She's six.
How is she making these jokes?
Dad, can we dig a hole?
Sure, what for?
I try to bury the ground beans.
Why did you do this to Dolly?
She was late to the tea party.
Buddy, you should be in bed.
I can't sleep.
Dads today, like you were saying,
they're so much more present than they were 20 years ago.
And this is like progress and expectations are different.
And you guys are leading the way on that.
We're trying.
Yeah.
Well, that's a lot of pressure, but thank you.
Sure.
Take it, though.
I'll take it.
You're good leaders.
Thank you.
When we started doing this, we did almost selfishly say,
we need content for dads.
Dads need a podcast to listen to.
And we were blown away by how much we've gotten response
from both moms and dads.
These are universal.
And that's been like the absolute best part of all this.
I love it.
How many kids do you guys have?
I have two kids.
And I have two as well.
Where are they now?
They were just over here playing--
Well.
They were in here?
Well, they were just--
one second.
Hey, kiddos.
Hey, guys.
That's actually-- that's the bathroom.
I'm going to go this way.
OK.
Check the, I guess, the back door.
I'm just going to make this phone call.
Hi, honey.
Hi.
The kids are with you, right?
Yes.
OK, good.
[MUSIC PLAYING]