“Oh, cheer up!” .. “Come on, put on a smile”.. If you want to aggravate an
already upset INFJ, stick to these easy phrases and you’ll be well on your way!
With the deep understanding that they can’t look to others to resolve their emotions,
INFJs don’t expect others to cheer them up. Yet, that’s not to say it’s not easy to do!
Welcome or welcome back PSYCH-Os! In today’s video we’ll be discussing 8 easy ways to instantly cheer
up an INFJ. Before we get into it, we’d love it if you liked and subscribe to our channel,
as well as to click the post notification bell so you never miss a video!
Alright, let’s jump right into it starting with..
Number 1: First, avoid these thing If you didn’t get it from the intro, we’ll
say it again. Some of the worst things you can do for the INFJ when they’re not feeling up to par is
give them half-genuine support. INFJs are usually quite aware that they are in charge of their own
problems and so trying to turn their mind off or distract them with classic ‘turn that frown upside
down’ quotes can end up making them even more annoyed. A few other things to avoid is trying
to convince an INFJ they’re overthinking, or that they brought they’re issue upon themselves.
And try avoiding any ‘if I were in your shoes’ scenarios because even this extroverted
feeling advice-giver knows, nobody truly understands where others are coming from.
They’re not one for tough love, and they’re not overly hyped about being confronted on
where they went wrong on a personal issue, so if you have nothing nice to say.. you know the rest.
Number 2: Notice and silently act
Okay, so now that we’ve covered everything we shouldn’t be saying or doing to cheer up an
upset INFJ, now let’s talk about the things you can say or do instead. INFJs won’t seek
help and will instead try their best to conceal their feelings of temporary dissatisfaction.
So, first, it takes someone rather close to them to feel out that there's something wrong.
And since the last thing an INFJ wants to do is blow their emotions out of proportion, they’ll
say everything's A-Okay if asked. So, by silently observing and acting with small, unseen and unsaid
gestures that usually don’t even get recognition are instantly noticed by the observant INFJ. For
example in a workplace setting things like going above and beyond to do the more difficult tasks,
taking some of their load off. Or if we’re talking about a family setting, things like picking up
some extra chores or giving the INFJ the night off of adult responsibilities are the perfect small
gestures that don’t scream “I can tell you need saving” but rather “put your feet up and relax.”
Number 3: Make them laugh!
Serious and deeply complex, INFJs may look like a tough cookie to crack, especially when they’re
not feeling like themselves. However, people closest to an INFJ will know first hand that
this is far from the truth. They have a crazy, silly side that just requires the right time,
place and person to come out of hiding. Now of course, this is one of those actions you have
to feel out of the mood for.. But considering the fact that INFJs feed off of the energies of
others, lightening the mood just may be the thing they need to crack out of their grouchy front.
Silliness, intelligence and dark humor are typically considered the weak spots to the INFJ’s
inner lighthearted spirit. With that being said, if someone's humor involves making fun of others,
or even playfully criticizing the INFJ, they can easily become uncomfortable and uninterested.
In fact, the wrong joke can change an INFJs entire mood for the worse. So, when approaching
this already risky tip, a rule of thumb is no teasing or bullying, just fun-loving, witty humor.
Number 4: Listen! Being the advocating type they are,
INFJs are known to be great listeners. Yet unfortunately as a result, this personality type
is often stuck being the open ear on the other end of a conversation. They’re rarely given the space
and patience from others to unleash their complex thoughts and ideas that are in constant flow.
In fact, it’s been this way for most INFJs since childhood, causing them to adopt a more quiet and
reserved demeanor despite actually having lots to say. And although most INFJs have gotten familiar
with this one-sided position in conversations, it is incredibly important for this rare personality
type to have people to listen to them when they need it. By vocalizing their thoughts, INFJs can
find it easier to sort through their rambling whirlpool of continuous thoughts, which helps
them get to the root of why they’re feeling what they’re feeling. So, by actively and attentively
listening to an INFJ, they will automatically feel supported, and depending on what they have to say,
maybe even a little relieved. Number 5: Leave them alone
Seems simple enough, doesn’t it? Just do nothing at all, and wait for the INFJ to respawn.
Of course, like any other personality type, an INFJ can feel feelings of anguish,
sadness and irritability in different ways depending on the situation.
However, one common denominator each situation has is the INFJ’s need for some alone time to process.
Although this rare personality type may enjoy having genuine connections around to seek support
in, they’re still known to be highly introverted and often highly sensitive individuals. Whether
they just need to recharge their social battery or reconnect with their introverted intuition,
sometimes doing nothing at all is the best remedy. This is especially true if that is what the INFJ
is communicating they need. They’re not just saying ‘leave me alone’ so they can wallow
in their feelings, but actually to use that time to figure out what the heck is going on.
When showing an INFJ that you’re supporting them, it’s important to respect this boundary of theirs,
and know that they won’t feel fully like themselves without it.
Number 6: Just silently be in their presence Since an INFJ is so often stuck inside their
own whirling thoughts, just being in an INFJ’s presence isn’t enough to get them
out of their heads and into the moment. This requires a connection that doesn’t involve
awkwardness or obligation when sitting in silence together focusing on solo activities. Luckily,
these are the only people that will know the INFJ well enough to notice the difference in
their energies. And so, by not assuming the INFJ’s emotions are anything more or
less than they are, providing backseat support is the perfect way to say
‘I’m here for you but we both know you’re probably going to figure it out on your own.”
On the other hand, having the ability to do their solo activities in the presence
of someone else’s calming energy can make alone time feel far less isolating.
Number 7: Plan something for later
INFJs are future focused thinkers. They rarely get stuck on the past, but can easily become
overwhelmed and even anxious about the future. So, if they’re feeling rather nervous or tense because
of an up-coming plan, sometimes it helps to schedule something even further from that dreaded
date for them to focus on. Let’s say they're due for some dreaded dental work. Maybe finding a
fun museum or planning a walk in the woods for after is all it will take to calm their nerves.
Plus, since the INFJ rarely rewards themselves for their accomplishments,
having something they can consider somewhat gratifying can make them feel excited
all on it’s own. Even if they’re too grumpy or in their heads to admit it upon being offered.
The 2 key things to keep in mind is that plans with people outside of their immediate social
circle may just add more pressure, and the plans have to be something the INFJ actually enjoys.
What do they enjoy? Well, let’s move on to..
Number 8: Take them somewhere to calm their senses
Keeping in mind those two key rules, if an INFJ is willing to step foot outside their house while
feeling only half like themselves, sometimes a peaceful outing can make all the difference.
More specifically, when an INFJ is feeling overwhelmed with obligations,
work expectations, unresolved emotions, toxic relationships and living situations,
nature and low-key adventures is a perfect remedy to take their mind off of things. Maybe it’s
something simple like a silent walk in the forest, a challenging hike, a day at the beach, or even
a long drive. Anything that requires just enough attention to not wander off into thought is good,
but anything in nature is best. In fact, most INFJs have an incredible love for nature
of all kinds and don’t mind visiting their favorite spots of beauty by themselves.
So, even just reminding them of these simple pleasures they can do alone can make their alone
time much more fulfilling. Oh, and if it’s a romantic connection, simple gestures such
as offering a shoulder rub or running a hot bath can instantly make the INFJ feel 10 times better.
Alright PSYCH-Os, that’s it for today. Before you go, let us know in the comments below if you think
these 8 things would cheer up someone with the INFJ personality type. Also, make sure to leave us
a like, share with your friends and also subscribe to our channel so that you never miss a video!