- Hey, how's it going? - Do not talk to me.
- I can tell you have had a rough day.
Girl, tell me all about it.
We are gonna have to take the long route
to your destination to work out some of these issues.
- Politics or religion?
Which of these would you prefer me to share my opinions on?
- Sir, your destination is a mile away.
Are you telling me you couldn't have walked?
It is a beautiful day outside!
- Hold onto your butt, we are making this light!
- All right, you got your seatbelt on?
Lemme just take a check for you.
It's just like a airplane, you know?
Except I don't have any snacks like on an airplane.
I'm just kidding, I've got snacks
in the back of the seat there.
- Whoa-ho, we are low on gas.
Looks like we're in a race against time, folks!
- Oh, you guys are on vacation.
That's real nice.
You know, I haven't been on vacation in 10 years.
- Just so you guys know,
if any scuffs, stains, or litter are found
in this vehicle after your ride, I will be very angry.
And don't even get me started on bodily fluids.
At that point, we might as well just set the car on fire
with both of us in it.
- You mind if I do some donuts in the parking lot?
- Right there on the corner is the best taco place in town.
If you're not in a rush, we could, uh,
we could stop there and get some tacos.
You are in a rush?
Okay, well, I placed a pickup order,
so I'll be really quick.
- Driverless cars will be here soon,
putting me out of a job.
Just keep that in mind when you're deciding
whether or not to tip me, all right?
- Sir? Sir, I think you missed my, my turn.
Sir? - Oh!
- In Tokyo, do they just call it drifting?
- You know, this is just my side hustle
until I get my real estate business going,
so if you ever wanna sell your house, just let me know.
I can really drive up the price.
Okay, get out.
- Oh, you guys are headed to the bar?
That's pretty cool.
You know, I set my own hours because I work for Uber.
That's how Uber works, so I can join you guys if you want.
No? What's your Instagram?
We can follow each other.
- You ever seen a car go on two wheels before?
- You know, without this GPS, I'd be totally lost.
It kinda makes me wish I had a GPS for my life,
you know what I'm saying? (chuckles)
- On the road of life, there are passengers
and there are drivers, but what about the drivers
who are being told where to go by the passengers?
There's a whole group of people
that are being left out of this analogy.
- Oh, wow! (laughs)
I did a lot of 16 Personalities comedy sketches
on this channel.
You don't believe me?
Well, why don't you watch some more?
Watch this one here.
You'll love it.
See you next week.
Until then, stay cool and attractive.