Welcome back ladies. Today as you know is TLC Thursday, and you know what we're going to
talk about? Hmmm. Today we're going to go into The Do's
and Don'ts of Dating.
So here at TLC as you know, we focus all about
relationships. But a lot of you are not in a relationship
and and probably out there mingling and in the dating world. But what I'm finding
is that we are committing some crimes here ladies, and if you're out in the
dating world I'm going to get into what to look out for, and what to stop doing.
So here we go the Do's and Don'ts of Dating.
DON'T: Talk about your ex or past relationships.
"Oh you have a puppy? Oh that totally reminds me of my dog that I had with my ex."
If you are going on a date remember that you don't need to get
into a soft story about what happened in your past, and what your last
relationship was like. Your current dating partner does not want to hear that.
DO: Answer questions honestly, but just keep in mind that you don't have to go
in detail. For instance, if the guy you're on a date with asks you "So when
was your last relationship?" It's fair to say "Three months, you know, one week ago,
one year ago." That's perfectly okay, but you definitely don't need to get into
why your past relationship didn't work and how you're feeling with it.
DO: Talk about yourself.
DON'T: Talk about yourself in excess.
"Oh you look like oh my god.
I totally like climb Mt. Zion, swimming oh I swim every single day.. You like Jordans? Me too!"
So remember, in these dates you're here to get to know
another person. You guys are here to get to know each other and as nerve-racking
a date can be, just remember that you're not going overboard and vomiting all
over the place about who you are, what you do, what you like, so much to the
point where everything reverts back to you. Remember if you're getting nervous
just breathe and get to know this person. That is the whole intention of a date.
DON'T: Drink too much.
It's perfectly normal to get those nerves and feel a little bit shy on your
first date, and the first thing that comes across your mind may be
getting a little loose with a few cocktails, but don't get too drunk.
You don't want this man to see your crazy side just yet.
DO: Have a one to two drink minimum.
I know that we want to loosen up a bit and
maybe we have these nerves, and maybe that's the first thing that you want to
go to, but give yourself a limit. Give yourself enough to loosen up, but still
where your coherent, and able to really take in this date. Another reason why you
don't want to drink too much, is you don't want to get sick in front of your date. That's gross.
DON'T: Dominate the date ladies.
"Are you sure you sure you want to order that?
Because last time I had that I really didn't like out I mean I'm not sure if
you're gonna like it but I really wouldn't recommend you doing that. Oh and
then oh no after - I don't just complete show you."
Again we talked about how uncomfortable first dates are, and it's very natural everyone goes through that,
uncomfortable you know time. However do not think that you can get over that
uncomfortable hump, by choosing your date, where you want to go, what you want to
eat, choosing for your partner. If you're dating a man ladies, let him be a man.
Don't dominate over the date, and/or the conversation. Like we said before, we
don't want to speak in excess about yourself you want to get to know the
person, but sometimes when we get nervous it's only you know normal for us to try
to control everything about the date, don't.
DO: Let the date flow, and get back to your natural energy.
You know when you take off the control of you
know where the date should go, and what expectations
you have on the date, you actually allow room for that other person to feel free,
and so what you see is once you release that energy then you'll notice that the
date actually flows a little bit better. And this is where you can get to know if
this date is actually working and if this is something that you want to you know continue, or if it's not.
DON'T: Talk about marriage or kids on this date.
"So what do you feel about marriage? When do you want to get married? How many kids do
you want to have? Because I'm thinking about like having like two or three, is
that good with you?" You're trying to get to know someone ladies and the first
thing to ever mention about marriage or kids is probably going to scare off any
man. They just want to come they're mostly focus on living in the moment, so
if you're going there that's what you should be doing too.
You barely just know his name, so stick with the basics you know
what he does, maybe what he loves to do, don't get into where this relationship
will be going in the future.
DO: Talk about future aspirations with personal goals. That's something that's
actually a good topic in dates. If you're running out of things to say maybe ask a
little bit more about what they love to do, or you know what goals are trying to
achieve, and you know maybe you'll see some similarities in that, and that's a
good actual topic for a date because that's endless but still just
remember never ever to throw all your cards on the table of the things that
you want intimately with a spouse. Again marriage, kids, off the table. A big
fat no no to end with ladies, is get off your damn cell phone! Seriously.
"Oh do you mind taking a picture of me? I mean you can get in it too, but I just want to put
this on Instagram." We have so many distractions and it's already
nerve-racking to be on a date, but it's so disrespectful also if you have your
cell phone, or you're texting someone, or you're on your social media doing a
selfie. We need to take that off. We need to be present with who are on a date
with. Again this state might be the date from hell,
or you may find that this date is something that lasts or jumps you into
something beautiful, but you will never know that, unless you're so present with
the person that you're spending time with. So like always ladies I'm here
every Thursday for TLC Thursday and I really really want you to think about
this when you're in the dating world. Think about what it is that you're
saying that could be scaring off a potential spouse. Again, don't think of it
as a future husband, or where your dream is going to go. If you're dating be
present with that person because you're still trying to find out you know who
they are, and what you like, and you may date a couple of guys, but if you can
stick to these tips I'm sure your dating life will be a success. So message me
your insights, and like always I'm available for you to comment you know
email, social media, whatever it is I'm here
for you. I love you ladies, and I'll see you next Thursday.