- What is the name of my book?
3, 2, 1.
- [All] She Memes Well
- I didn't write it down, but yes, that is true.
- Yes
- Sorry Chris.
[upbeat organ music]
- Hello I'm Chris Perfetti.
[laughing]
- I'm Lisa Ann Walter, using my real voice.
- I'm William Stanford Davis, I'm also using my real voice.
- I'm Sheryl Lee Ralph, and I'm not using my real voice.
- I'm Quinta Brunson
[all laughing]
We're the cast of Abbott Elementary.
We're gonna test
how well we know each other with Vanity Fair.
- Yeah.
See how well we know each other? Or don't.
- Okay, suckers. My first question for you is,
what is my favorite episode of Abbott Elementary?
- I know what that answer is.
Can I go first?
- Stan?
- No, can I go first? I said I know it first.
- Stan?
Yeah, of course, Sheryl.
- Desking.
- Woo!
- Thank you.
- I also knew the answer.
- I knew the answer to that too.
- Okay.
My next question...
- What is your favorite color?
- ....close. If I were a cocktail, what would I be?
- This one I don't know the answer to.
- Hmm...
- Oh, a dirty Manhattan.
- This is like a Baba Wawa question.
- Would be a dirty Manhattan?
- Like the one with olive in it?
- Like a dirty...
- That's gross.
- That's gross? Okay.
- A Manhattan has a cherry.
- Yeah.
- You can't put a cherry and an olive in a drink.
[Chris buzzing]
- [Chris] Time's up.
- Okay wait, I wanna guess, Prosecco.
- No. No.
- I don't know.
- I'm gonna guess...
- We're a really cohesive bunch.
- I'm gonna guess Paloma.
- Ooh, I should have guessed Paloma. Paloma! Paloma!
- How the hell did you know that?
- Yes!
- Okay that's cheating.
- Yeah. A delicious Paloma.
- Paloma.
- Next.
- [Lisa] I don't believe you.
- There's no way you will get this
because I definitely haven't told you,
but what was my first job?
- [Lisa] Okay.
- [Sheryl] Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
- I really, I think that you were a...
- A barista.
- ...you were a...
- Starbucks barista.
- Shut up!
- Thank you!
- Thanks Vanity Fair, I'm Chris Perfetti.
[playful organ music]
- Oh, Lord have mercy.
All right.
My first question is,
how old was I when I first graduated from college?
- I'm gonna say.
- Go ahead.
- I'm gonna say 19.
- [Sheryl] What are you going to say?
- When you graduated from college?
- Wait. From college.
- College.
- 19.
- Not high school, college.
- People graduate when they're 22.
- Yeah, 21 I'm changing my answer.
- 21, 22.
What would you say, sir?
- 30.
[Sheryl laughing]
- 30. I'm only 30 now darling. I'm 30 now.
- Seriously, I'm gonna say 21.
- 21. Yeah.
And Lisa, what say you?
- 19
- 19?
- Yeah.
- And the winner is Miss Lisa Anne Walter.
- [Quinta] How?
I was 19 years old.
- [Quinta] How?
I went into college at 16.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- And I figured out quickly what you needed to do.
You needed to go to class, complete the task.
That was it.
Go to class. Complete the task.
- What? When did you get drunk
and sleep through first period?
- No getting drunk, I was too young.
- How old were you when you started kindergarten?
- Four.
- Me too.
- [Sheryl] There you go.
- But how come I didn't, all right.
- All right, here we are, because I love weddings.
How many bridesmaids were in my second bridal party?
- My no.
- Oh second, second.
- Oh dang it. That's not fair.
- Hold on.
- I know the picture. I can see the picture in my head.
- Judge Maybeline.
- Who's guessing first?
- There was Jennifer Louis.
[all exclaiming]
- Bridesmaids. Second wedding.
- Gonna say, I'm looking at the picture in my head.
I'm gonna say, 8, cuz 10 seems like too much.
- [William] 8.
- 12
- What?
- 12.
What do you say?
- Well, you named four, so I'm gonna say four.
- What say you?
- 8.
- And you are all incorrect.
The perfect number was 10.
- Dammit, I was gonna say 10.
- 10, 10, 10s across the board.
- I thought that was too much.
- 10 is never too much.
I heard you.
- [Lisa] I had 12.
- [William] I thought 8 was too much.
- All right, let's see, next.
What role did I debut on Broadway?
[all groaning]
Come on, let's go first.
- Wait, what's the role?
- Dream Girls. I know I need the role.
- Dream Girls.
- Oh my God.
- Her name is...
- Oh God, my brain. Come on help me.
- Oh no no. Oh my God.
- Come on now.
- Why? It's like, Sherry or Sunshine or..
- All I'm getting is Effy and it's not Effy, sorry.
- [Sheryl] It's not Effy.
- Come on guys.
- Can I have my phone?
- Seriously, no for real.
Like I can't get name.
- You say Dream Girls?
- Yeah, but I know that you know the name.
- You don't know the role.
- No, I do, but gimme a second.
- A character in Dream Girls you're saying.
- Yes.
- No, it's not that.
- Wait a second. Hold on.
This is a trick question.
[Chris laughing]
This is a trick question.
- Very good Vanity Fair.
- This is a trick question.
Okay, go back.
Can you ask the question again please?
- What role did I debut on Broadway?
- Did you debut as in,
you were the person who presented the role
or what role was your first role?
- I did, what was it?
- Her first Broadway role.
- That, I don't know.
- Me neither.
- I actually made my Broadway debut
in a musical called Reggae,
and I replaced the leading lady
and had 10 days before the show opened,
and I opened on Broadway with a script in my hand.
We opened the day of the transit strike
and closed the day of the garbage strike.
[all chuckling]
But in the audience on that closing day was Tom Irons.
Who said to me, I have an idea for your next show.
And that was
- [All] Dream Girl.
- There you go.
[clapping]
[playful organ music]
- Here you go baby, you need this.
- Oh, thank you very much.
- You're welcome welcome.
- Okay, you guys ready?
- [William] Ready.
- [Lisa] Yes.
- Right. I had a terrifying encounter
with which famous magician.
Do not yell it out, please.
- But why was it terrifying?
- I don't know, but I have a guess.
- All right you guys can guess.
- David Blaine.
- Anybody else wanna guess?
- David Copperfield.
- Copperfield.
- I would've guessed David Blaine too,
but because it's already covered,
I'm gonna go with Chris Angel.
- Oh, that's a good guess.
- Good one.
- It was America's David Blaine.
[clapping]
- Good job guys.
- [Quinta] David Blaine.
He put a photo in my phone that I didn't take.
He bit my wine glass.
- What?
- He put a stamp on my hand.
It was a really terrifying experience.
I don't want to talk about it.
- I saw you talk about it on a show, I didn't think of that.
- Magic is real.
- Right.
- What was my first job in LA?
- Buzzfeed.
- Anybody else wanna guess?
- I do.
- [Quinta] Yes.
- You worked at the Apple Store.
- Anybody else wanna guess?
- Ooh!
- I wanna go Apple Store too.
- I see her as a Techy.
- Yeah.
- I think you were at the Smart Bar.
- [William] Yeah.
- She did do Smart Bar.
- Genius bar.
- It's not the Smart Bar?
[Chris laughing]
I give up.
- That was a literal joke in the second episode.
- You just Barbara-ed yourself.
- I just Barbara-ed myself, oh God.
- Ready?
- Okay, Genius Bar.
- Apple.
[all cheering]
- We listen to you!
- A family room specialist.
Fixes phones and iPads and, what's it called, iPods.
- But you still won't fix ours when they mess up.
- I try.
Okay, this one's easy
and I think you should all shout it out at the same time.
- Okay, go ahead.
- What is the name of my book?
3, 2, 1.
- [All] She Memes Well!
- No, I didn't write it down,
but yes that is true that is the name of my book.
- Yeah.
- I'm sorry Chris
- Who is my celebrity height twin?
- Stephanie Mills
- Kevin Hart.
[all laughing]
- Kevin Heart's a good answer.
- First of all, not Kevin Hart.
- Sorry Kev.
- Stephanie Mills is short?
- Oh, she's tiny.
- Yeah, she is, really.
- Yeah. She's really small.
- Okay.
- She had to look like a little girl.
- Yeah.
- Can you give us a hint?
- Oh wait, she was a little girl then.
- Is it Oh, oh, oh.
Is it, is it, is it...
is it Glinda? Glinda.
- No
- Glinda.
- Glinda?
- Oh, Kristin Chenoweth.
- [Sheryl And Lisa] Kristin Chenoweth.
- That's a good answer.
- What? Is it Chenoweth?
- Wow!
[cheering]
I'm so shocked you got that.
- You know.
- No one ever gets that.
Yeah. She's the same height as me.
- That makes sense. That makes sense.
- I just looked her up when I was like
is anyone else really, really, really
really short in Hollywood?
- She's so teeny.
- Holly Hunter is very small too.
- I just thought she probably saw you somewhere
and then ran next to you and stood next to you
and went, "We're the same height."
In that voice.
- Haven't met her yet.
I would love to meet her.
- She'll come and find you.
- You'll meet her.
- She's very sweet.
- All right.
- Thank you. Good luck.
[upbeat organ music]
- [Sheryl] You have the marker darling?
- Oh, yes.
- [Sheryl] There you are.
- This is, I don't even know this.
What is my hidden talent?
- Oh, I know.
- Yeah.
- You ready?
- Yeah.
- Do you want us to say it?
- You are cuisina cook, a kitchen Cook.
- Oh yeah. That's a good one.
- You're a cook, yes.
- Zucchini Bread.
- That's a good one. Yeah, yeah. Okay, okay.
- You sing. You're a singer.
- Aww. Thank you.
[sobs]
- Oh My God. Lisa, what are your answers?
- What is your answer?
- Ballroom dancing.
- [All] Oh!
- Does it count?
- Just going ballroom dancing.
- Okay, good.
Oh, this is a good one.
Who's my favorite standup comedian?
- Yourself.
[laughing]
- Living or...
- Any.
- Favorite? Rivers.
- Joan Rivers.
- [All] Yes!
- Joan River.
- That's your guess?
- That's what I was gonna say, Joan Rivers.
- Is it a man or a woman?
- Man.
I could pick a favorite female obviously
but for this purposes, man.
- Oh, I know...
- One who made me wanna be a comic.
- See who I thought it was...
- Rodney Dangerfield.
- Oh my God.
- I'm gonna go, It might not be right
but I'm gonna go Robin Williams.
- Pryor.
[all exclaiming]
- I was gonna say Richard Pryor.
- What is a cause that I am passionate about?
- Politics.
- [Quinta] Politics.
- Okay, but you specifics.
- [Sheryl] Specific?
- Yeah.
- Women's...
- Women's rights.
- Women's and reproductive rights.
[cheering]
You guys know me.
Oh, I'm not even gonna do it.
Everybody shout it at once.
What movie role am I most often recognized for?
- [All] Parent Trap!
- Chessy.
- That's right.
- Stand the Man.
[playful organ music]
- This is a very easy one.
- I'll be the judge of that.
- What was my favorite line from the show?
- That's trash!
- I had three, but what's my favorite?
- That's how you run the world kids.
- I'm still gonna go, that's trash.
- I can't pick one for him though.
I mean, she got some big feet.
- Sweet baby Jesus and the grown one too.
[all exclaiming]
[laughing]
- Oh, no.
- Trick question.
- Sweet baby and the grown one too.
- Okay. What baseball team am I a fan of?
- The Dodgers?
- Yeah. I'm not gonna go with...
- Oh, he said, uuuuh.
- Okay, shoot.
Hey Stan, where are you from?
- I'm from St. Louis.
- The Cardinals?
- Yes. Yes.
- The Cardinals.
- It's not some random guest to say The Cardinals.
- Yeah, okay.
- [Quinta] So it is?
- The Cardinals.
- Okay it is.
- Okay. What do I do to relax?
- Sleep.
- Smoke a Cigar.
- Cigar?
- That's close.
- You sit outside.
- It's close.
- I don't know.
I've seen video of him salsa dancing on the back patio too.
- I know.
I was dancing and smoking a cigar.
- I play golf.
[all groaning]
- I didn't even know that.
- Oh, wait a minute, you said you don't,
are you still playing?
- I mean, when I play, I play.
- All right so we're gonna go out an hit that nine hole,
over on Wednesday.
- I didn't know that.
- None of you are gonna get this,
what was the name of the band that I was in?
- I knew it.
- The Temptations.
- I knew it.
- It's a little known secret.
- I knew you were in a band.
- I did not know it, therefore I do not know the name.
- What's the name of it?
- The name of it? I'm just gonna come up and make up...
- Metallica.
[laughing]
- Okay. The Parliament Funkadelic
- Close.
- Oh really?
- Parliament Funkadelic is close?
- Yeah.
Well, Confunction.
- No.
- Is it a band that that made a few records?
Or was it a smaller...
- Is it a smaller local band?
- [Chris] Underground.
- Opened for a lot of major acts.
- But close to Parliament kind of sound.
Maybe the name is close to Parliament.
Like you could be like the House of Representatives.
- I'll give you a hint.
- That's a great name for a band.
- There's a famous studio here in Los Angeles...
- The Paramounts.
- That's the name of the...
- Oh wow!
[all cheering]
- The Paramounts. Yeah!
- It was the Fabulous Paramount Review.
We had three female singers.
We had four guys.
We had a big band.
And I was the was the Star.
- Oh!
[clapping]
- This is giving Mr. Johnson big time.
- Yes it is!
[laughing]
- That is the storyline we would have wrote for Mr. Johnson.
- Yes!
- He just named the band The Paramounts.
- We opened for The OJs.
We opened for James Brown.
- [Sheryl] Oh wow.
- We opened for a lot of lot of people
that came to St. Louis.
- [Sheryl] Oh wow.
That's awesome.
- Lot old groups.
- Very cool.
- Yeah. Yeah.
I think that's it.
- Oh, that was it.
That was fun.
I learned a ton.
That was crazy.
I didn't know
that you were favorite comedian was Richard Pryor.
- My first albums that I bought with my own money were
George Carlin's Class Clown.
- That's what I was gonna guess was George Carlin.
- But I was given Richard Pryor
because back then you couldn't buy his albums
if you were under a certain age.
And I had a high listening to those
and then I started repeating
all of his material to my mother.
- Of course you did.
- And it made her laugh.
And then I was like, Oh I can talk dirty
if I just say it's comedy.
- No
- [All] Thank you Vanity Fair!
- And now, class dismissed.
[cheering]
[William laughing]
- [Sheryl] My whole stack went that way.