- THIS IS A WONDERFUL BOOK. - THANK YOU SO MUCH.
- I'VE BEEN FLIPPING THROUGH IT ALL DAY LONG.
I'M BRINGING IT HOME. I CAN'T WAIT TO READ IT.
AND IT'S GETTING GREAT REVIEWS. CONGRATULATIONS ON THAT.
- THANK YOU. THANK YOU SO MUCH.
- AND SO YOU WERE ON "THE OFFICE."
YOU WERE ALSO A WRITER.
WAS IT THE--DID YOU START OUT AS A WRITER,
OR WERE YOU ALWAYS...
- YEAH, WELL, I STARTED OUT AS A STAND-UP,
AND THEN ONE NIGHT GREG DANIELS,
WHO CREATED THE SHOW "THE OFFICE,"
SAW ME AND ASKED FOR A MEETING AND THOUGHT
HE WANTED WANTED WRITER-ACTORS ON THE SHOW,
SORT OF LIKE IT WAS "SNL" OR SOMETHING,
WHERE WRITERS ACT.
SO I JOINED AS BOTH AT THE SAME TIME,
AND I HAD BOTH JOBS ALL THE EIGHT YEARS THAT I WAS ON IT.
- THAT'S REALLY COOL TO WRITE.
THEN YOU CAN WRITE MORE FOR YOUR CHARACTER
AND REALLY FEATURE YOURSELF.
- WELL, I ENDED UP WRITING LESS.
I GUESS I GOT--I KIND OF THOUGHT I WOULD WRITE--
EVERYONE ELSE THOUGHT I WOULD WRITE FOR MYSELF,
AND I KIND OF THOUGHT, "WELL, WHO AM I TO WRITE FOR MYSELF?"
AND SO I ENDED UP JUST, LIKE, GOING LIKE THAT, LIKE,
ONCE PER EPISODE FOR SOME OF THE YEARS.
BUT IT WAS FUN TO HAVE INPUT ON YOUR CHARACTER
AND NOT ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THE WRITERS
WERE GONNA COME UP WITH, WHICH I LIKED.
- I THINK IT'S A REALLY GREAT IDEA.
AND MINDY WAS A WRITER ALSO, RIGHT?
- YEAH.
- AND I THINK IT'S A GOOD IDEA FOR THE ACTORS
TO BE WRITERS AS WELL.
AND THEN JOHN KRASINSKI WAS ON--
YOU WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL TOGETHER OR SOMETHING?
- JOHN KRASINSKI AND I HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER
OUR WHOLE LIVES IN THE WEIRDEST, MOST COINCIDENTAL WAY.
WE PLAYED LITTLE LEAGUE TOGETHER.
THERE'S A PICTURE IN MY HOUSE OF A LITTLE LEAGUE TEAM
THAT I WAS ON IN SIXTH GRADE,
AND I WAS SICK THAT DAY THE PHOTO WAS TAKEN,
SO JOHN IS IN THIS PHOTO THAT'S BEEN IN MY HOUSE MY WHOLE LIFE,
AND I'M NOT.
THAT'S HOW BIZARRE THE WHOLE THING IS,
BUT WE'VE KNOWN EACH OTHER FOREVER,
AND WE SHOWED UP-- THE FINAL AUDITION CALLBACK
FOR "THE OFFICE," AND THERE HE IS FOR JIM,
AND I'M THERE FOR RYAN, AND IT'S LIKE--
IT'S SO BIZARRE THAT SOMETIMES I THINK IF I EVER WOKE UP
AND THE WHOLE "OFFICE" HAD JUST BEEN A DREAM,
I'D BE LIKE, "I KNEW IT WAS A--
I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN."
LIKE, YOU KNOW WHO PLAYED JIM?
JOHN FROM HIGH SCHOOL.
YOU KNOW, IT'S THAT WEIRD.
- IT IS WEIRD. IT'S VERY STRANGE.
AND I LOVE JOHN. HE IS A GREAT GUY.
HE'S A FRIEND OF MINE,
AND HE AND EMILY ARE JUST LOVELY, AND...
SO YOU STARTED OUT, YOU SAID, AS A STAND-UP,
AND I, OF COURSE, STARTED OUT AS A STAND-UP,
SO I KNOW HOW HARD THAT IS TO-- DID YOU TOUR AND EVERYTHING?
- YEAH, YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I DID, YOU KNOW.
I HADN'T REACH ANY LEVEL LIKE YOU HAD
FOR YOUR SHOWS, BUT I-- YOU KNOW,
I WAS GETTING THERE, HOPEFULLY, YOU KNOW.
- DID YOU LIKE IT?
LIKE, DID YOU-- BECAUSE I REALLY WAS ALWAYS
SCARED TO DEATH ON STAGE.
- REALLY? - ESPECIALLY IN THE BEGINNING.
- I'M SO SURPRISED TO HEAR THAT, BECAUSE WHEN I WATCH YOU,
AND ESPECIALLY AT THE OSCARS,
WHICH I THOUGHT WAS THE MOST INCREDIBLE PERFORMANCE...
[cheers and applause]
- THANK YOU. THANK YOU.
- AND ACTUALLY, I TALKED TO MY STAND-UP FRIENDS ABOUT THIS,
BECAUSE I COULDN'T BELIEVE,
HERE YOU ARE ON THE BIGGEST STAGE IN THE WORLD.
AND YOU ARE SO CALM AND SO CENTERED.
I'VE NEVER SEEN ANYONE-- EXCEPT FOR SNOOP DOGG,
WHO DOES THIS TOO WHEN HE WALKS ON STAGE,
BUT YET SO MUCH FROM BEING SO CALM,
SO I'M VERY SURPRISED TO KNOW THAT YOU WERE NERVOUS.
- WELL, I MEAN, I'M CALM NOW, BUT WHEN I FIRST STARTED OUT--
AND THAT NIGHT I WAS VERY CALM.
I JUST WANTED TO BE PRESENT, YOU KNOW.
I WANTED TO REALLY BE THERE FOR THAT,
BUT, I MEAN, WHEN YOU START OUT,
IT IS THE SCARIEST THING IN THE WORLD TO PRESENT YOURSELF
IN FRONT OF A GROUP OF PEOPLE AND TRY TO MAKE THEM LAUGH.
- YEAH, AND I WAS TERRIBLE AT FIRST TOO,
WHICH MADE IT ONLY MORE UNCOMFORTABLE,
AND I REMEMBER ONE NIGHT--
IT WAS ACTUALLY VERY CLOSE TO HERE
AT THE HA HA CAFE IN BURBANK-- I WAS BOMBING SO BAD--
- THE HA HA CAFE. - THE HA HA CAFE.
SO YOU KNOW IT'S FUNNY.
BUT IT CERTAINLY WASN'T THE NIGHT I WAS THERE.
I WAS PERFORMING THERE, AND I WAS SO BAD
THAT THE CROWD MUST HAVE FELT SYMPATHY FOR ME,
AND I GOT--I GOT--
PROBABLY THE ONLY TIME THIS HAS EVER HAPPENED--
A HELPFUL HECKLER,
WHO STOOD UP AND SAID, "SLOW DOWN.
ASK US WHERE WE'RE FROM."
[laughter]
THAT'S HOW YOU KNOW YOU'RE BAD,
WHEN THE AUDIENCE IS TRYING TO HELP--
THE HECKLERS ARE TRYING TO HELP YOU.
- OH, THAT'S SO SWEET.
THAT REALLY HAPPENED?
SOMEBODY SAID, "ASK US WHERE WE'RE FROM"?
- ASK US WHERE WE'RE FROM, AND I ASKED WHERE SHE WAS FROM,
AND SHE WAS LIKE, "KANSAS CITY,"
AND I HAD NO COMEBACK.
[laughter]
THANKS FOR NOTHING.
- OH, NO. - YEAH, IT WAS A NIGHTMARE.
- WELL, IT ALL WORKED OUT.
- EVENTUALLY, IT WORKED OUT, YEAH.
- THAT'S THE FUNNY THING.
I MEAN, YOU KNOW, PEOPLE START OUT IN STAND-UP,
AND IT'S REALLY DIFFICULT, AND IT'S SCARY AS HELL,
AND THEN FOR SOME REASON,
WE JUST KEEP GOING BACK AND GETTING BETTER AT IT,
BUT REALLY EVER SINGLE TIME YOU GO ON STAGE,
IT'S TERRIFYING, UNTIL YOU START TO--
TO HAVE CONFIDENCE, WHICH YOU CAN'T HAVE CONFIDENCE
UNTIL PEOPLE LAUGH AT YOU, AND THEY WON'T LAUGH AT YOU--
- YEAH, YOU JUST HAVE TO DO IT. YOU JUST HAVE TO DO IT.
- BUT THIS IS A REALLY, REALLY GREAT BOOK,
AND LIKE I SAID, IT'S GETTING GREAT REVIEWS.
SO THERE ARE LONG STORIES, THERE ARE SHORT STORIES.
AND HOW LONG HAVE BEEN WORKING ON THIS?
- I WORKED ON THIS-- AFTER I LEFT "THE OFFICE,"
I DIDN'T REALLY KNOW EXACTLY WHAT TO DO NEXT.
I HAD ALL THESE IDEAS, BUT I DIDN'T KNOW
IF THEY ALL FIT TOGETHER IN A NEW TV SHOW OR WHAT.
AND SO I JUST KIND OF LIKE A CRAZY PERSON HAVING A BREAKDOWN
JUST, LIKE, WROTE ALL THESE IDEAS,
AND I DIDN'T CARE HOW LONG OR SHORT THEY WERE.
AND THEN I THOUGHT, "WELL, MAYBE I COULD MAKE THIS INTO A BOOK
"FOR PEOPLE WITH SHORT ATTENTION SPANS.
LIKE, SOME WILL BE LONG, SOME WILL BE SHORT."
I NOTICED IN YOUR BOOK TOO YOU--
- THAT'S WHAT I DID.
- YEAH, YOU HAD SOME THAT WERE SHORT-SHORT STORIES,
YOU KNOW, JUST A NICE LITTLE WORLD
THAT YOU CAN GO INTO FOR A MINUTE.
- IT'S GREAT. I MEAN, THERE ARE SO MANY.
AND SOME ARE LONGER. - SOME ARE LONG.
- THIS IS ONE OF THE SHORTEST ONES.
I THOUGHT YOU SHOULD READ THIS ONE TO PEOPLE.
THIS IS PROBABLY THE SHORTEST ONE IN--
- ONE OF THE SHORTEST, YEAH.
OH, I LOVE THIS ONE. THANK YOU.
THIS IS CALLED "IF YOU LOVE SOMETHING."
ARE WE GONNA DIM THE LIGHTS?
[laughter]
NO? I'M GETTING A NO, IT SEEMS.
"IF YOU LOVE SOMETHING."
"IF YOU LOVE SOMETHING, LET IT GO.
"IF YOU DON'T LOVE SOMETHING, DEFINITELY LET IT GO.
BASICALLY, JUST DROP EVERYTHING, WHO CARES."
[laughter and applause]
- VERY PHILOSOPHICAL.
- KIND OF A MORE BITTER... - YEAH.
- YEAH.
[laughs]
- IT'S A GREAT BOOK.
IT'S GETTING GREAT REVIEWS, DOING VERY WELL.
- THANK YOU.
- AND I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE NICE IF YOU WOULD GIVE
EVERYONE IN THE AUDIENCE ONE.
[cheers and applause]
- I WOULD LOVE TO. YEAH.
- ALL RIGHT.
WELL, YOU CAN GO PASS THEM OUT.
- WANT ME TO DO IT MYSELF? - YEAH, YEAH.
LOOK AT THAT.
THANK YOU.
- ALL RIGHT.
- SHOULD I TAKE THESE AND GIVE THEM AWAY?
THAT'S VERY COOL.
- "ONE MORE THING" IS NOW AVAILABLE
IN BOOKSTORES EVERYWHERE.
WE'LL BE BACK WITH KYM DOUGLAS.
[upbeat music]