you look uh thin i mean have you always
been this thin or i'm sick real sick
dude really i'm sorry um what's this
probably my last appearance oh no
um
uh
well no i i'm not ill um but uh i guess
is what i should have said i have to i i
i have to work at it you know my my my
body does not
happily or willfully discover you do to
stay in shape
uh i i i run a lot i really like that
that's great i'm on the mouse wheel uh
at least at least once a day right um
but what it does is it builds up a lot
of stiffness in my back in my legs um
and supposed to be hard on a person
really it is it is but uh when you've
got a 350 pound man inside of you
waiting to get out you run like hell
so if you could you would just eat
everything inside is that the deal i
would yeah i would yeah i would this
doesn't work though does it no it
doesn't my body holds on to a great deal
um
so uh so yeah so i'm i'm often stiff um
and
[Applause]
nobody likes a bragger
[Applause]
but he comes out and announces that that
he's oh boy
yes
you keep the heart rate up you're gonna
have a good libido okay
so running the running is hard on your
uh joints uh forgive me yeah and uh
and what do you do well i'm out there in
fufi la la land and and and my fufi lala
friends uh say that yoga is real good
i've heard yoga is tremendous um it
that's a strong word it's uh
it's
it's um i i started at a very early age
doing yoga uh because my father was very
big on it and i was uh still too young
to outrun him so
um so he would he'd grab me throwing me
in the car along with my sister and and
take us to
uh a a a guy who taught yoga that is a
huge national deal now this guy bikram i
don't know if you guys know who oh i
didn't know it was a guy it's from a guy
who developed that form of yoga no no
that this that was yonks ago but this
guy is uh
this is thousands of years old i i'm
told oh i thought it was the guy's name
was bikram i'm sorry
well the guy's name is the guy's name is
his name is bikram but yoga dave is old
i understand that but it's the bikram
that i have heard over and over again
there is beak yes there's bikram yoga
that is a man's name and what bikram's
hook is is that he turns up the heat so
high right in his
that if you were if you were confused
that you were in hell he makes it very
very clear
now you mentioned that you and your
sister started when you were kids
because of your dad's insistence is that
what we're looking at here yeah this is
this is proof of the story here there's
uh there's there's me
and there's justine
and um here's here's bikram looking
pleased um
that's actually bikram that's become you
see he doesn't hold a lot of water
weight because he's he's in the he's in
the hot room most yeah most of his day
um but yeah these these gals loved it i
don't know what their problem was but um
look how miserable justine is sure and
you you're not pleased with it i'm not
pleased at all i mean so yeah so
somebody call amnesty international
because
this just doesn't look right at all
i mean was it as creepy as this picture
suggests
i
can't believe it was
but i'm back on it now you're back on
the yoga i'm back on it now yeah working
for you
uh yeah it's it's limbering me out a
little bit um but uh i i don't know i
just i don't get i don't know how it
ever took off you know it's you're
you're twisting yourself into useless
shapes
for uh no clear reasons loosely called
exercise but you're really just sweating
because you're stretching stretch so
it's a it's a reach um and there's a lot
of there's a lot of swapping of fluids
there on the there's any sweats flying
everywhere there's a lot of you smell a
lot of feet there's a lot of breath
i'm i'm i like to get out there and run
i'll take the stiffness yeah you can air
yourself out in instantaneously but uh
now we had the pictures of you and your
sister when you were kids and you have a
is it a four four-year-old daughter now
i have a four-year-old daughter well
how's that that much i'm not pushing her
into yoga at all
um but it's uh it's it's good um my my
wife and i love her dearly we're going
to keep her
was was that in question for a while yes
it was
um but uh but so no so we we've still
got her i'm working on my fathering
skills uh i thought i was doing well
um i i drive her to school every day
that's great i think it's great um i
would say well i mean great but it's
it's good yeah it's good um uh but you
know well i'm out of town a lot so when
i am in town it is it is there's a
regiment there no matter what i'm gonna
drive her to school
we can count on that we've got our
little routine we split a little
breakfast bar in the morning and we
listen to music some nice little you
know disney soundtrack or whatever it is
and
uh lately though um she has uh only uh
put up with about two or three songs
from that and then wants to go right to
bieber um justin b justin bieber um and
this is my fault i i took her to the
documentary which is a great great movie
yeah here i am justin is that what it's
called
no no no it's justin bieber i don't know
what the
what it's what is it
he will suck you right in it's like a
vortex i'm looking into my own personal
addiction to justin but what i've done
is i've i've spread it to my poor
four-year-old i mean i've i've
introduced the serpent into the garden
okay
she is
way into it i i got the i got the album
too and so now we're listening to that
in the car and and she's singing about
these these heartbreaking relationships
and passionate bonds at the top of her
lungs um to like a phantom person that's
sitting next to her and i catch her in
the rearview mirror and she's just well
it's it's it's cute right a little bit
well it's cute it's cute until she says
she says daddy can you turn that down
and we need to talk
and and i and i so i turned it down and
um
and i looked i looked in the rearview
mirror i said what's what's what's going
on sweet sweet sweet girl what are you
gonna tell me and she says she says uh
she says daddy yesterday i kissed a boy
i kissed jasper
well that is that's very sweet all right
i had my first kiss at at five and so i
thought uh she's four i mean
uh she's we're in los angeles she's it's
it's advanced it's a nightmare
but i think kids do that it's just a
routine display of affection it's
nothing to worry about i hope fingers
across dave but um she she what is your
fear what is your worry the fear
followed that which was um
hey we're not going to tell mom
and and and i said i kind of smiled
thought it was charming but i i said why
and she said she says well i want to
know i want to know how it rolls out
i want to know
i want to know i want to know if this is
sticking with jasper
because is that because are you serious
yeah because old biebs is telling her
about how
you know things will blow right up in
your face
and things can blow apart in a heartbeat
and jasper could be knee-deep in the
whole class i mean he's talking about
things that uh that a four-year-old she
knows english so she understands a
concept and now she thinks that
that that love and romance could be a
world
this makes me feel a little sick because
i have a seven-year-old i don't think he
knows who justin bieber is now have i
done something wrong or have i done
something right
hard to know
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